toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch
@toddlunch.bsky.social
350 followers 430 following 3.8K posts
Father was a harsh man.Tough disciplinarian. Once, he caught me smoking cigarettes. As punishment he locked me in a cupboard, & wouldn't let me out until I'd eaten the entire contents of Knowsley Safari Park. Including the gift shop. He never told me why.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 3h
It's a fucking disgrace.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 3h
Scarily accurate. Did you date him as well?
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 3h
How does that advice go? "Count the crowd"? "Imagine all the sheep naked"?
Something like that anyway.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 3h
A friend of mine went on a few dates with him, but ended it abruptly when they found out the mice he kept weren't pets; he would scoop a handful out of the cage and eat them like they were snacks.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 12h
Gravy Seals
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 20h
Have you checked down the back of Alpha Centauri?
toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 21h
They fit rubber bumpers on the planes so they'll just bounce off eachother instead of exploding.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Maybe it's silica gel.
toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Saves me fetching the birch I suppose.
toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
I'd read it, but assumed you meant due to causes beyond your control, rather than somehow being the cause of it. Anyway, I'll shut my stupid mouth and go away and think about what I've done etc.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
I think you may have misunderstood my joke, which would be indicative of my crap sense of humour. Conversely, I may have misunderstood yours, which would also be indicative of my crap sense of humour. In either case, my apologies.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Civil War 2- Secession in a Recession
toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
You seem to be a bit down lately Robin, which is sad to see. Hope things improve chief. Keep being you. :)
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
I'll definitely be wrong no matter what silly suggestions I spew up, so you needn't take the time to shoot them down. Although I do appreciate it.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Then I'm all out of ideas for ten minutes.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Laurence Olivier in Ernest Saves Christmas.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Still don't.
toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Wilfred Brambell as Buddy the Elf.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Bill Maynard as Kevin McCallister
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
I've no idea.
toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Betty White as John McClane (Die Hard)
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 1d
Don Knotts as Billy Elliot.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 2d
How can we be certain you won't ensure there isn't a 2026, so you can just sack the thing off and trouser the money?
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 2d
I'd rather chew a bezoar thoroughly, than use that guff.
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toddlunch.bsky.social
Todd Lunch @toddlunch.bsky.social · 2d
Trip to the fairground was a waste of time. Apparently you need to be "this clothed" to go on the rides.