Louis Benzig
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traumschwinge.bsky.social
Louis Benzig
@traumschwinge.bsky.social
150 followers 260 following 1.3K posts
Enjoyer of video games, fandom and fiber crafts. Educator irl. Multilingual.
I love hedgehogs and birds. 18+
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traumschwinge.bsky.social
Friend of mine went to the @jmberlin.bsky.social today and sent me a tutorial for beading so ofc I had to make it:
A bracelet made of wire and glass pearls on squared paper A bracelet made of wire and glass pearls on squared paper from a different angle
November 17, 2025 at 8:53 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Here's my #ghoap fic for the @mwmpregweek25.bsky.social
You can read it on AO3 at archiveofourown.org/works/743156...
Rating: M 16 Nov 2025 A Sniper Doesn't Miss by traumschwinge Call of Duty (Video Games) No Archive Warnings Apply, John "Soap" MacTavish/Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Simon "Ghost" Riley, Trans John "Soap" MacTavish, Trans Male John "Soap" MacTavish, Trans Mpreg I Trans Male Pregnancy, MWMpregWeek2025, Established Relationship, Mpreg | Male Pregnancy, John "Soap" MacTavish Loves Simon "Ghost" Riley, Simon "Ghost" Riley Loves John "Soap" MacTavish, Fluff and Angst, Idiots in Love Despite taking precautions, despite being in a gay relationship, despite only having had PiV sex once in nine years, Soap ended up pregnant. He wasn't sure how to deal with it, the changes he'd face, but he knew one thing for sure: he'd keep it. Whatever Ghost said once he found out, Soap would keep their baby. Language: English Words: 697 Chapters: 1/7 Collections: 1 Hits: 0
November 16, 2025 at 11:06 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Without really meaning to, his hand closed around Johnny's biceps. Their eyes locked. Simon forgot how to breathe, drowning in the glittering ocean blue. He wasn't sure who moved first, but then their lips touched. The kiss was everything. A firm press of lips against his own, Johnny all around him. But as soon as it'd started, Johnny was pulling back again. He cleared his throat. "Ah... I... we'll see each other tomorrow." And with that, he fled over to Fiona's car, ears so red they shone even in the dim street lights. Simon watched their car until it was out of view and then just stood there, outside their front door, feeling unmoored. He barely registered Tommy stepping out next to him. "I'm so fucked," he whispered, turning to his brother, curling himself into him in an embrace. Tommy, to his credit, patted his back in an awkward sibling hug. "He's nice and charming and sweet," Tommy muttered back. "Can see why you love him." Simon whined in the back of is throat, allowing himself to be vulnerable and t sting Tommy. "It's a good thing." Tommy let out a deep sigh. "I know I'm giving you a lot of shit. But. Damn. I want you to be happy, Simon. You deserve it more than anyone. And if it takes a crazy Scot like him. Well. Fine by me. Bloody hell he didn't blink when I postured. He's just so sure of himself. Can you trust him to keep you safe? Because I can. And that's what an alpha should do. Don't hold yourself back because of us, alright." With another pat on his back, Tommy let go. He hesitated for a moment, but then turned back in without another word, leaving Simon to stew in his feelings on his own.
November 16, 2025 at 5:45 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Here's the first three paragraphs after the pov change 😇
Simon watched Soap get hugged by his mother and felt something fall into place. Like he'd unknowingly been waiting for this moment all his life. He should have brought Soap home ages ago. Not even Tommy's usual jackassery was enough of a detriment. And yet, Soap had even taken the posturing in stride. He really was everything Simon wanted in an alpha and more. His own mother immediately taking a shine to him only cemented his view. Dinner was as peaceful as it could be with three MacTavishes at the table. Fiona and Tommy had decided to team up on Soap, teasing him relentlessly, yet without real malice. Daniel and Joseph kept asking Soap any question that crossed their mind, be it about the army or football. Beth and his mother had decided to subtly needle him about his intentions and their plans for the future. Soap was the center of attention. As he should be in Simon's opinion. And all the while, Simon got to hold his hand like he had every right.
November 15, 2025 at 5:57 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
#wipwednesday more uncle trap Ghoap. The game of chicken is heating up. No they have not talked about any feelings yet.
Mrs Riley gave him a long and slow once over, taking in his tanned skin, tight shirt and, with a sudden pinch of her brows, the few scars she could see on him. It made him wish he'd dressed up before meeting her, but his warm smile never faltered. At least not until Simon suddenly poked him in the side. "Wha— yer weapon, what's that about?!" Simon chuckled. "You looked like you had to suck up to the brass. Thought I'd break the tension." "She is the brass, yer eedjit, least as I'm concerned," John snapped back. "Just because your maw raised two alpha helions doesn't mean every mom has to rule with an iron fist. Lighten up." "Och, ye're one to talk, ye got me maw wrapped around yer little finger already." Mrs Riley chuckled suddenly. It had John turn back to her, his face heating rapidly. "Ah... I... ehem….." "It's fine, fine," Mrs Riley waved him off. Her eyes were suspiciously moist. "It's just. It's been a while since I've heard Simon laugh or bicker like that." She took a step forward and pulled John into a surprisingly tight hug. "Thank you for taking care of my boy." John was at a loss for words. There was nothing he could say that wasn't wildly inappropriate, considering the deal he had with Simon. So he stayed quiet and just hugged her back, promising in his heart of hearts to protect Simon no matter what. "I'll..." He swallowed. "I'll keep taking care of Simon." "That's all I ask," Mrs Riley assured him, letting go only to press a quick kiss on his left then his right cheek. "Be a good alpha for him, too. He deserves happiness."
November 12, 2025 at 12:28 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Shocked pikachu meme, but Agumon
November 9, 2025 at 7:41 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Made Kimchi Nabe. Very good choice on a cold day.
A stew in a dark bowl. It contains enoki mushrooms, carrot, chives, tofu, cabbage and bean sprouts. The broth is reddish. A cutting board with cut ingredients: enoki mushrooms, carrot, chives, tofu and cabbage.
November 8, 2025 at 8:44 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Wip wednesday #ghoap
Still the uncle trap fic
Joseph is stepping up his meddling game
“Mom, Dan said his uncle’s coming home, too. Can you ask Fiona which train he’ll be on? Maybe we could wait together?” To sell it, Joseph even batted his eyelashes. “I wanna help pick up Simon this time. But it’d be more fun with Dan there, too.” “Alright, alright.” Beth picked up her phone to type out a quick question. “Huh. It’s the same train as Simon.” Joseph beamed. Across the table, Tommy snorted. “Oh, are they, now? Bet they’ll be riding together, too.” “Thomas Riley, you leave your brother alone!” Beth chided without any real fire. “I think it’s cute he’s finally found somebody. John seems nice.” “Yeah, yeah.” Tommy tucked his head. “I won’t tease him too much. God knows he deserves it.” “Remember the picture they sent Joseph in the summer? They looked so happy together,” Joseph’s grandmother Mary weighed in. “I really wish Simon would introduce us.” “Well, you know Simon. Chances are he won’t tell us anything until one day he just casually mentions he’s gotten hitched.” Tommy waved his hand dismissively. “Who’s to say he hasn’t already gotten himself knocked up. Or mated.” Joseph perked up at that. “You think so?” Tommy shrugged. “I think he wouldn’t tell us either way until he shows up with a pup.” “I bet John would tell us! He likes talking, just like Dan.” A smirk stretched over Tommy’s face. “Oh, does he now? Why don’t we invite the MacTavishes for dinner tomorrow, then? Bet Fiona would be glad not to have to feed her lot herself.” Joseph nodded vigorously before turning his best puppy eyes on his mother. “Can we have dinner with Dan and his mom, pleaseeeee?” It was early evening when the train rolled into the station. Ghost had complained under his breath the entire time as he'd untangled himself from Soap, after having slept on his shoulder for most of the afternoon. After a surprise last minute mission, they'd barely had half a night on base before they had been supposed to leave for home again. So Soap couldn't begrudge Ghost the shut eye. He could, however, internally bemoan his overactive fantasy. Not that the upcoming month was looking like a relief on that front. They were both sure their nephews had something planned for them. What he hadn't expected of them, however, was being ambushed right on the bleeding platform. He'd barely stepped off when he heard a shriek from his left and saw a blur dash towards him. It was only thanks to Ghost right behind him that he didn't bolt right back into the train. That, and making out his name in the shriek. Daniel launched himself at his shoulders and missed, knocking the air out of John. A broad hand between his shoulderblades steadied him. "Careful, Johnny," he murmured, before crouching down just enough so Joseph could wrap his arms around his uncle. Without any visible effort, Ghost straightened up again, the boy perched on his arm like a toddler. "Did you come here together?" Joseph looked a little too innocent for John's liking. "Dan mentioned John'd arrive the same day as you so we figured." "Ah," was all Ghost had to say to that. He nodded at a thin, brown haired woman. "'Ello, Beth. No Fiona?" "She's looking for a parking spot," the woman, Beth, shrugged. "Should be here in a minute but the boys were insistent."
November 5, 2025 at 8:34 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Wip Wednesday even tho I haven't written much because I once again caught the flu
But if there was something, why hadn't Ghost pushed for more? Soap definitely had tried, had toed all lines Ghost had drawn between them, just to eke out the smallest progress. "What am I supposed to do? I've never even thought about finding myself an omega." "Can't be that hard, can it, sergeants?" Ghost's voice from behind them made them both jump. ''s not like omegas aren't roughly twenty percent of the population." When neither answered him, he prowled closer, coming to a halt right in front of Soap. "Do you need help?" "I..." Soap stammered. His heart was beating so fast he was afraid he might crack a rib. He wanted so badly to fling his arms around Ghost's neck and start begging to be accepted as a suitable mate. "No, I just..." He faltered again. This close, he had to crane his neck to look into Ghost's eyes. He could smell the irritation on him. "You just what, Johnny?" Ghost growled. "Spit it out." "He's into tall and massive," Gaz piped up. Without being the target of Ghost's irate attention, it was easier to talk. Soap was a little jealous, mostly because he was fighting all his instincts just so he would stay in place. "Emotional constipation optional. Know a guy like that, lieutenant?" Ghost glared at him now. "No." He put a heavy hand on Soap's shoulder and squeezed. The gesture reminded Soap there was no escape. "But I could do with some help during my next heat. Somebody to keep the tossers away. Unless you want me to go to Price." About what was left open. In Soap's mind, it was about insubordination and a suitable punishment. Laps until you puke Ghost had said. "Soap'd love to." Gaz' smile was evident in his voice. Soap could do nothing but nod. "Good man." Ghost patted Soap's shoulder. "Let me know if you need an evening off for a date." He went to fix himself a cuppa, while Soap stood rooted in place. It was funny, really. In life or death situations, he'd always thought his instincts were to fight. But faced with Ghost's wrath, his body had decided to freeze, to play dead. Not even Gaz tugging on his arm could drag him out of it. Only after Ghost had left with his tea did Soap stumble over to the couch where he promptly collapsed. "I'm fucked," he declared.
October 23, 2025 at 3:24 AM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Fall season!
Purple flowers (cyclamen?) in front a conifer in the middle, red and yellow sycamores in the background
October 19, 2025 at 12:17 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Two dishes on a light brown table. The dish in front is fried tofu and vegetables in an orange sauce with rice noodles. The dish in the back is a bowl with tofu, rice and various green vegetables.
October 18, 2025 at 3:43 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Late for Wip Wednesday by a day. But anyway, here's two pining idiots #ghoap
"John is really nice," Joseph hummed. He'd turned back to his breakfast. "He asked about you, too, Simon. Text him." In an instant, Tommy appeared next to Simon, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "So John's your alpha boyfriend, then?" "No," Simon said just as Joseph chirped: "Yes!" Despite Simon's withering glare that'd send any lower rank running, his own nephew continued to twist the knife and fan the flames: "You scented him yesterday at the chippy." Simon pulled his hood over his head, to hide his warming ears. He'd always hated Tommy's teasing. Tommy had clearly smelled blood in the water. "He got scented good before he arrived here, too," he told Joseph. "His hoodie on the trip from the station was drenched with it." Joseph's face immediately fell. "That can't have been John. They only met yesterday." Tommy's grin widened considerably. "Oooooh, scandalous. One man at home, one on base, huh?" "I'll fill your bed with worms, Tommy," Simon growled, pulling his hood shut to hide from the teasing. If only half of it were true. Or all, considering that Soap and John were the same person. But Soap was barely his friend. There was no way he'd see him like that. He was just a friendly person, to everybody, even to Simon. It didn't mean anything. The scentings were accidents, or to scare off other alphas. They didn't mean anything. Even if Simon meant it every time he scented Soap. They weren't fast enough. Just as Soap was about to get behind the wheel, Tommy hollered: "Don't worry! We won't tattle to your military boyfriend, Simon! Have fun on your date!" Soap barely made it two turns before he had to open his bloody smart mouth. "Military boyfriend, huh?" "Shut. Up." The growl didn't come out nearly as menacingly as Simon had wanted it to. He'd toned it down when he'd noticed their nephews in the backseat perking up. However, that also meant Soap was completely undeterred. "Nonono, I gotta know who. Gaz? Price?" Simon glared at him. That didn't work either. Soap, still smiling brightly, was looking straight ahead at the road, ignoring him completely. "I can and I will kill you," Simon hissed. Soap gasped. His smile turned into a mockery of a frown. "Don't tell me it's Shep-" He never got to finish the name. Instead, Soap yowled in pain. Simon had clamped his hand around the top of his left knee and dug his thumb right into a pressure point where it really hurt. Simon leaned in close to whisper, easing his grip so Soap wouldn't cause an accident: "Tommy thinks you're my boyfriend because you can't keep your body odor to yourself. Basically, he thinks I'm with Soap and cheating with John." Soap's eyes widened in understanding. He swallowed. "Understood, Simon," he said, tone shifting from his jovial off-duty voice to a more composed, clipped one. "I'll keep that in mind." Protests erupted from the peanut gallery. "Uncle Simon! Don't threaten people!" And "John, you can take anyone in a fight. show that boyfriend!" Careful not to jostle the cat, Simon leaned against Soap. He purred: "Thought you were my alpha." Just for a fraction of a second, Soap stiffened. Then, he laughed. "Only in your brother's dreams." "True," Simon chuckled. "But doesn't mean we can't pretend for the afternoon." He desperately wanted to pretend for a while. To have Soap close, maybe be held or at least lean on him. "This morning was a whole day." "That bad?" "Tommy is a pest." "You love your brother, though." Simon snorted. "Rarely." Soap laughed. The way he moved his head, it was almost like he wanted to press his nose into Simon's hair. "He probably means well. As does Fiona, planning our wedding already." "Oh, great, so Beth's probably in on it, too," Simon huffed. "Joseph told him his and Daniel's moms get along great. There's no escape. Might just as well elope now." "You won't even let me take you out for dinner." "I let you buy us fish'n'chips." "Yes, you and Joseph. That doesn't count." "Oh, now you get to decide what does and doesn't count again?" Simon let his head slip closer to Soap's neck so he could breathe in his scent better. The cat in his lap had started to purr. "The pub is not a date. Especially on nights when rookies get to go out." Soap clearly wanted to protest. But he had no argument there. "You also missed my birthday," Simon went on. "It was in April." Soap gasped. "You have a birthday?" "Sod off, of course I do."
October 16, 2025 at 1:47 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
美食ですか, @radio298.bsky.social さん？😅
October 13, 2025 at 5:04 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Got some fancy sweets for my tea time in the mail today. This one didn't survive intact so I ate it first.
A rice cracker shaped like a snow covered mount fuji on a black plate decorated with a moon, rabbits and grasses.
September 26, 2025 at 3:19 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
First time I belt wove. So I'm posting my bad art. Since I have it. I learned a lot about tension. I might need a better setup to weave.
An ocre and brown woven band on my knee
September 20, 2025 at 9:58 AM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
I published the final chapter of my #ghostsoap vigilante/superhero AU yesterday. I haven't written P with Plot in a while. Consider giving it a read:
archiveofourown.org/works/69070386
Explicit M/M no warnings complete Chemistry Of Survival by traumschwinge Call of Duty (Video Games) No Archive Warnings Apply, John "Soap" MacTavish/Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, John Price (Call of Duty), Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Simon "Ghost" Riley, Phillip Graves (Call of Duty), Vladimir Makarov, Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Alternate Universe - Mob, author is not a chemist, Chemical Inaccuracies, John "Soap" MacTavish is Trying His Best, Traumatized Simon "Ghost" Riley, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Aftermath of Violence To get away from his father, the well known mob boss Vladimir Makarov, Soap had become the chemical supplier of choice for the entire underworld of the city he lived in. Then, one day, the notorious vigilante The Ghost showed up on his doorstep with a pipe bomb and made Soap reevaluate his priorities in life.
September 17, 2025 at 7:34 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
If it weren't the exact same in Mandarin and I weren't just looking up the pronunciation, this'd be super confusing.
A screenshot from a dictionary app. In the search field is written 南無阿弥陀佛. Search results are the six individual characters with individual readings and meanings unrelated to the meaning of the phrase. The phrase is an invocation of the Amitaba Buddha (the buddha to come, central to Zen Buddhist rites and believes)
September 16, 2025 at 11:53 AM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
晚饭🥣
Turnip-and-cabbage salad, tomato-and-cabbage in shouyou, rice and teriyaki style mushrooms
September 14, 2025 at 5:49 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Saw a cool slug yesterday
A leopard slug on a grainy gray surface
September 11, 2025 at 3:22 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
I started uploading my vigilante #ghoap #ghostsoap AU fic to AO3! Will update every monday for the upcoming month (5 Chapters total)
archiveofourown.org/works/690703...
Rating: Explicit Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Category: M/M Fandom: Call of Duty (Video Games) Relationship: John "Soap" MacTavish/Simon "Ghost" Riley Characters: John "Soap" MacTavish, John Price (Call of Duty), Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Simon "Ghost" Riley, Phillip Graves (Call of Duty), Vladimir Makarov Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Alternate Universe - Mob, author is not a chemist, Chemical Inaccuracies, John "Soap" MacTavish is Trying His Best, Traumatized Simon "Ghost" Riley, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Aftermath of Violence Language: English Chemistry Of Survival By traumschwinge Summary: To get away from his father, the well known mob boss Vladimir Makarov, Soap had become the chemical supplier of choice for the entire underworld of the city he lived in. Then, one day, the notorious vigilante The Ghost showed up on his doorstep with a pipe bomb and made Soap reevaluate his priorities in life. Notes: Thanks to my friends gobiin and hammershark for their help with the title. Will update this every Monday.
August 12, 2025 at 6:48 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Baby's first homemade kanten
A block of peach kanten-- a japanese sweet made with agar agar water and sugar. It sits in a white marbled plate. Behind it is a bamboo spoon.
July 28, 2025 at 6:52 PM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
I did some art this week
Three prints and the lino plate used for them on my workspace. Depicted is a simplified headshot of Ghost from Call of Duty Modern Warfare
July 12, 2025 at 9:18 AM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
I don't usually do #wipwednesday but have some misunderstanding based #ghoap drama
“He went to Makarov,” Ghost ground out. “Made a deal with him. That’s when I left.” “What deal?” Laswell pushed. “Do you know any details?” Ghost shook his head. “Only that it was about me. And him.” The words tasted like ashes. Soap had really gone to Makarov for a deal, after he’d learned what had been done to Ghost. “Makarov promised him he could keep me as a pet.” “That can’t be right. What did he say? Exactly?” Dr Josie stared at him in utter disbelief. “Soap would never-!” “It’s exactly what they said!” Ghost roared. His fists were clenched. He was trembling. He didn’t want to believe it either. “Soap arranged to hand me over and Makarov promised Soap’d be the one to take me out!” Ghost wanted to throw up. “Simon…” Suddenly, Price’s hand was on Ghost's shoulder, grounding him. When Ghost didn’t fight him off, he pulled him into a tight hug. “I’m so sorry.”
July 9, 2025 at 6:20 AM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Alright I wanna do this too
1 Like = 1 fic I want to write
June 30, 2025 at 5:55 AM
traumschwinge.bsky.social
Hi everyone, I updated my and @xixii1.bsky.social 's entry for the COD big bang.
Read on from ch5 here: archiveofourown.org/works/659154...
Or start at ch1 here: archiveofourown.org/works/659154...

4 more chapters will come next monday at 6pm CEST
Background is clouds in various orange shades. The headline reads COD big bang sneak peek. In a big black box in white letters is a snippet reading: “Plan’s easy enough.” Riley shrugged. “Just wish bug spray or tick cards worked on the damn parasites. You” He pointed at John “find us a portal. We” He turned on the toe of his boot to grab Nik by the front of his shirt “will pay the king of the fae a visit. It’s been two years since his wife kicked him out. I reckon it’s time he starts groveling.”
June 2, 2025 at 4:05 PM