My hand got fucked up by the air bag in a car accident and the amount of people who have seemed offended that I won't shake their hand with my bruised and swollen hand is genuinely perplexing.

New hobby is wearing copious amounts of body glitter into the mosh pit.

This has been feeling real AF lately

I am mad envious of the people who got license plates that start with CAR.

I'm convinced that the highest achievable honor in life is to have a rat grab you by the hand and try to pull you into their cage. To be accepted among the rats.

It breaks my heart every time that I am too large to join them.