i want to be loved

I feel so alone
I loved her so much
I still love her
Now I have nothing
She was my reason for living
What am I supposed to do now?
I'm too scared to kms
But maybe doing so will make me feel better

If you want to reply to a post on this account, dont
Just dm me, either on my main or here
I dont want to bother anyone who follows you

None of my friends would have to worry about me taking my own life
I'm too much of a pussy to do anything

Last night I was in vc with friends sharing my screen
I was on soundcloud and I came across Today I Laid Down
I love the project so much, but whenever I come across it I feel sad

Kinda sad I never came out to my friends sooner
Maybe I would've enjoyed high school more
Hopefully I can come out to my family soon
But I'm scared

I have no idea why it took so long to come out to my friends
Most of us in our friend group are queer
I'm the only trans person tho (as far as ik)

Unless I say something genuinely worrying, I promise you dont have to worry about me or check up on me
I guess I should confess this tho, most of the time if someone asks how I am, when I say "I'm good"
I'm not really good, but I dont like people worrying about me

I hate this country, I hate politicians, everything sucks
I'm gonna stay alive and have hope everything will be okay
And so younger queer people in america wont lose hope
Stay safe

I love you gang

- Aubrey

I hate falling in love with friends cause if I tell them I like them no matter what happens the friendship is over

Sometimes I think I'm genderfluid cause sometimes I feel really dysphoric, and other times not
But I feel like theres a higher chance that I just ignore my dysphoria most of the time
I hate labels so much, gender and sexuality why does it matter
Labels make me hate myself most of the time

Sometimes I remember an old discord friend of mine
We used to be really close then one day she stopped talking to me
It took me so long to get over her, even if she hates me now I hope she's doing well

The reason I make alts to vent is cause I hate talking/venting to others sometimes
But I've realized over time that not talking fucks up my headspace
I'm also afraid that if I vent I'll lose friends, and I hate feeling alone

If a server I'm in has a fashion/selfie channel I'll barely look in it cause it makes me hate myself

This probably would've been better as a vent post, but this is probably the best way to describe my sexuality

If you want to reply to a post on this account, dont
Just dm me, either on my main or here
I dont want to bother anyone who follows you

my main is @passivity.bsky.social because I'm gonna delete my twitter alts eventually I made this account as a vent account