In 1983, when I got a job at the U Chicago Computer Science –er, right before it was a department again, not sure what it was– I had to be told to check my email once a day. In a matter of weeks I had an addictive obsession that lasted until I got RSI in 1994 @csail.mit.edu
bsky.app/profile/fray...

It's here, it's now. WIP

And let Vance follow his boss tradition.. count us 3!

When the stock market trades at PE multiple of 50 or 100, it's great time for billionaire promoters to sell their stocks or raise debt on the high valuation. Money gets drained from stock buyers, mostly middle class. It's the great money transfer from middle class to elite (top 400).

Investment means spending. Spending means commitment. Commitment means we're serious about the future. The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

But completion will be tracked. Completion is a metric. Metrics go in dashboards. Dashboards go in board presentations. Board presentations get me promoted. I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does. But I know what it's for.
It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month. I'm requesting an expansion. 5,000 more seats. We haven't used the first 4,000. But this time we'll "drive adoption." Adoption means mandatory training. Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

Now we're on Microsoft's website. "Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot." The CEO shared it on LinkedIn. He got 3,000 likes. He's never used Copilot. None of the executives have. We have an exemption. "Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team. They wanted to feature us as a success story. I told them we "saved 40,000 hours." I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up. They didn't verify it. They never do.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT. I said we needed "enterprise-grade security." He asked what that meant. I said "compliance." He asked which compliance. I said "all of them." He looked skeptical. I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

The CFO asked about ROI. I showed him a graph. The graph went up and to the right. It measured "AI enablement." I made that metric up. He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now. I don't know what that means. But it's in our investor deck.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds. It took 45 seconds. Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations. But I called it a "pilot success." Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

Three months later I checked the usage reports. 47 people had opened it. 12 had used it more than once. One of them was me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity." That's not a real number. But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x. I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards." They stopped asking.