Violet Gray
@violetgray.bsky.social
Nerdy Standup comic, forever GM, gender-fluid gothy weirdo, having fled X before it could give it to us.
"Hi I'm a leftist nonbinary bisexual who plays D&D"
Me :: looks around::
"Oh, my polycule is over by the joust across from the turkey legs"
Me :: looks around::
"Oh, my polycule is over by the joust across from the turkey legs"
October 23, 2025 at 10:36 PM
"Hi I'm a leftist nonbinary bisexual who plays D&D"
Me :: looks around::
"Oh, my polycule is over by the joust across from the turkey legs"
Me :: looks around::
"Oh, my polycule is over by the joust across from the turkey legs"
If someone asks you a question and it knocks you over maybe it's time to retire from Congress
October 16, 2025 at 9:36 PM
If someone asks you a question and it knocks you over maybe it's time to retire from Congress
I can't believe the Nobel Peace Prize didn't go to someone who changed the Department of Defense to the Department of War and is currently sending troops to the cities of his political opponents
October 11, 2025 at 4:24 PM
I can't believe the Nobel Peace Prize didn't go to someone who changed the Department of Defense to the Department of War and is currently sending troops to the cities of his political opponents
Shut up,
Or the next Superbowl halftime show will be Worse Bunny.
Or the next Superbowl halftime show will be Worse Bunny.
October 7, 2025 at 6:19 PM
Shut up,
Or the next Superbowl halftime show will be Worse Bunny.
Or the next Superbowl halftime show will be Worse Bunny.
"Ok...ok... Maybe if I stand reeaal still the other Republicans won't notice than I'm brown..😓"
September 13, 2025 at 2:23 PM
"Ok...ok... Maybe if I stand reeaal still the other Republicans won't notice than I'm brown..😓"
"This is not okay. You shouldn't be making light of this tragedy and you need to consider his loved ones."
--- people who had jokes when George Floyd was killed
--- people who had jokes when George Floyd was killed
September 11, 2025 at 8:48 PM
"This is not okay. You shouldn't be making light of this tragedy and you need to consider his loved ones."
--- people who had jokes when George Floyd was killed
--- people who had jokes when George Floyd was killed
Kevin Sorbo and Scott Baio have decided to reject any and all acting gigs coming from woke California.
In solidarity with them I will be refusing all requests to become a surrogate mother from this point forward.
In solidarity with them I will be refusing all requests to become a surrogate mother from this point forward.
August 26, 2025 at 2:43 AM
Kevin Sorbo and Scott Baio have decided to reject any and all acting gigs coming from woke California.
In solidarity with them I will be refusing all requests to become a surrogate mother from this point forward.
In solidarity with them I will be refusing all requests to become a surrogate mother from this point forward.
Going back to the gym so I can visit my feet once in a while. I hope they're doing ok
August 23, 2025 at 2:45 PM
Going back to the gym so I can visit my feet once in a while. I hope they're doing ok
Meanwhile, at MAC headquarters :
"Has Violet found a foundation that matches?"
"Yes sir. We've just had reports from the Ulta in Hunt Valley, MD."
"Good. Now discontinue that sh-t Mwuhahahaa"
"mwuhahaha"
"Not you, Guillermo. Evil CEO laughing only."
"Has Violet found a foundation that matches?"
"Yes sir. We've just had reports from the Ulta in Hunt Valley, MD."
"Good. Now discontinue that sh-t Mwuhahahaa"
"mwuhahaha"
"Not you, Guillermo. Evil CEO laughing only."
August 19, 2025 at 12:48 PM
Meanwhile, at MAC headquarters :
"Has Violet found a foundation that matches?"
"Yes sir. We've just had reports from the Ulta in Hunt Valley, MD."
"Good. Now discontinue that sh-t Mwuhahahaa"
"mwuhahaha"
"Not you, Guillermo. Evil CEO laughing only."
"Has Violet found a foundation that matches?"
"Yes sir. We've just had reports from the Ulta in Hunt Valley, MD."
"Good. Now discontinue that sh-t Mwuhahahaa"
"mwuhahaha"
"Not you, Guillermo. Evil CEO laughing only."
Hi. Here are some shirt slogans for loggers I made up:
1.) I saw that
2.) I got 99 problems but a birch ain't one
3.) Lumber Jacked 💪
4.) Branch manager
5.) Every tree is the giving tree
1.) I saw that
2.) I got 99 problems but a birch ain't one
3.) Lumber Jacked 💪
4.) Branch manager
5.) Every tree is the giving tree
August 9, 2025 at 3:26 AM
Hi. Here are some shirt slogans for loggers I made up:
1.) I saw that
2.) I got 99 problems but a birch ain't one
3.) Lumber Jacked 💪
4.) Branch manager
5.) Every tree is the giving tree
1.) I saw that
2.) I got 99 problems but a birch ain't one
3.) Lumber Jacked 💪
4.) Branch manager
5.) Every tree is the giving tree
You can tell a clothing site is fast fashion if the name sounds like something you can summon.
"50% off all dresses on Beebalool"
"50% off all dresses on Beebalool"
August 4, 2025 at 10:39 PM
You can tell a clothing site is fast fashion if the name sounds like something you can summon.
"50% off all dresses on Beebalool"
"50% off all dresses on Beebalool"
Hi I'm Donkey Kong and this is my sidekick..... D. We just call him D these days 😒
July 30, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Hi I'm Donkey Kong and this is my sidekick..... D. We just call him D these days 😒
Ok hear me out--
A DJ that only spins 90's music named DJ Tanner
A DJ that only spins 90's music named DJ Tanner
July 29, 2025 at 5:54 PM
Ok hear me out--
A DJ that only spins 90's music named DJ Tanner
A DJ that only spins 90's music named DJ Tanner
"I'm putting real sugar in Coca Cola!"
"I'm gonna deport Rosie O'Donnell!"
"Obama is a traitor and I'm gonna arrest him!"
He's trying EVERYTHING to distract from the Epstein files!" 🤣
He's one step away from pointing out into the distance going "What was that" then sprinting away from the podium
"I'm gonna deport Rosie O'Donnell!"
"Obama is a traitor and I'm gonna arrest him!"
He's trying EVERYTHING to distract from the Epstein files!" 🤣
He's one step away from pointing out into the distance going "What was that" then sprinting away from the podium
July 27, 2025 at 2:43 AM
"I'm putting real sugar in Coca Cola!"
"I'm gonna deport Rosie O'Donnell!"
"Obama is a traitor and I'm gonna arrest him!"
He's trying EVERYTHING to distract from the Epstein files!" 🤣
He's one step away from pointing out into the distance going "What was that" then sprinting away from the podium
"I'm gonna deport Rosie O'Donnell!"
"Obama is a traitor and I'm gonna arrest him!"
He's trying EVERYTHING to distract from the Epstein files!" 🤣
He's one step away from pointing out into the distance going "What was that" then sprinting away from the podium
The Grim Reaper trying to appease us with Hulk Hogan.
You know DAMN WELL that's not who we were hoping for...
You know DAMN WELL that's not who we were hoping for...
July 24, 2025 at 6:27 PM
The Grim Reaper trying to appease us with Hulk Hogan.
You know DAMN WELL that's not who we were hoping for...
You know DAMN WELL that's not who we were hoping for...
He once saw a discarded popsicle on the ground and did a line of ants.
76 is pretty good.
76 is pretty good.
July 23, 2025 at 11:35 PM
He once saw a discarded popsicle on the ground and did a line of ants.
76 is pretty good.
76 is pretty good.
Labubu sounds like how you'd say 'injury' in French
July 22, 2025 at 5:54 PM
Labubu sounds like how you'd say 'injury' in French
Today's Coldplay concert is sponsored by Ashley Madison
July 19, 2025 at 1:23 AM
Today's Coldplay concert is sponsored by Ashley Madison
Hey, whatever distracts him
July 4, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Hey, whatever distracts him
Today's weather is perfect if you've ever wondered what it would be like to breathe pudding
June 23, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Today's weather is perfect if you've ever wondered what it would be like to breathe pudding
Redpiller : " the male loneliness epidemic must be dealt with."
"I agree." ::transitions::
Redpiller: "NO I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE LONELINESS PART "
"I agree." ::transitions::
Redpiller: "NO I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE LONELINESS PART "
June 13, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Redpiller : " the male loneliness epidemic must be dealt with."
"I agree." ::transitions::
Redpiller: "NO I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE LONELINESS PART "
"I agree." ::transitions::
Redpiller: "NO I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE LONELINESS PART "
Just got a call from my dealership because my car texted them that it needed an oil change.
Why is my vehicle better at self care than I am 😭
Why is my vehicle better at self care than I am 😭
June 3, 2025 at 12:18 PM
Just got a call from my dealership because my car texted them that it needed an oil change.
Why is my vehicle better at self care than I am 😭
Why is my vehicle better at self care than I am 😭
If anyone is friends with any female birds out there, please tell them that there is an eligible bachelor perched in the tree outside of my window.
This little incel desperately needs a mate and prefers to shriek about it at 2:48 in the morning.
This little incel desperately needs a mate and prefers to shriek about it at 2:48 in the morning.
June 1, 2025 at 4:10 PM
If anyone is friends with any female birds out there, please tell them that there is an eligible bachelor perched in the tree outside of my window.
This little incel desperately needs a mate and prefers to shriek about it at 2:48 in the morning.
This little incel desperately needs a mate and prefers to shriek about it at 2:48 in the morning.
Me, driving : "I can't wait to get coffee this morn-"
My brain (in a pirate accent) :
"To the porthole
To the hull,
For sails and waves and gulls,
Till all these keels get hauled,
Till all yar yar landlubber
Till all yar yar spot land"
My brain (in a pirate accent) :
"To the porthole
To the hull,
For sails and waves and gulls,
Till all these keels get hauled,
Till all yar yar landlubber
Till all yar yar spot land"
May 6, 2025 at 11:56 AM
Me, driving : "I can't wait to get coffee this morn-"
My brain (in a pirate accent) :
"To the porthole
To the hull,
For sails and waves and gulls,
Till all these keels get hauled,
Till all yar yar landlubber
Till all yar yar spot land"
My brain (in a pirate accent) :
"To the porthole
To the hull,
For sails and waves and gulls,
Till all these keels get hauled,
Till all yar yar landlubber
Till all yar yar spot land"