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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 17m

I've just arrived and they've given me a leaflet explaining they'll do an extra test on Hb levels if I don't pass muster today, so here's hoping I can be properly drained today!

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 19m

I don't think mine did anything apart from make a noise and make my phone buzz.

Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 29m

I got turned away due to borderline low haemoglobin so I've been eating all day in the hope of boosting my blood levels.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1h

Snap! I've been getting the texts and e-mails for about 3 days now.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1h

I had something similar on a previous PC with an RFID reader. It recognised my phone and bank cards as the same technology as our smartcard log-in gubbins, but didn't know what to do with it beyond that.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 2h

I'm a member of an affiliated union and received notice of my vote today. I don't know a great deal about either candidate if I'm honest.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 3h

It's a set meal so I don't know if that will even be an option as yet. It's for the works Christmas do. I thought the guy organising might have looked at the menus as well as whether or not there was a turn on. 🤷

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 3h

You'd think if you booked somewhere for a 3 course meal that had a vegan option for a main, they might trouble themselves to do the same for the starter and the dessert, no?

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 4h

Sending love and good thoughts. #FuckCancer indeed.

Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 4h

😬 Yikes! He looks like something out of the League of Gentlemen, so why not have the personality to match?

Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 4h

You what now?

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 6h

That's First Officer Bill Esquire to you.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 6h

Suits you sir.

two men in suits and ties are standing next to each other and looking at the camera .

Alt: Mark Williams and Paul Whitehouse as the tailors from the Fast Show. Two men in suits and ties are standing next to each other and looking at the camera .

media.tenor.com

Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 20h

Nice out on tonight's run.

A photograph of a sunset over a lake. The clouds above are reflected onto the water.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 20h

The meat industry has very deep pockets!

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 21h

The sort of person who reads the Daily Mail? I don't think so.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 22h

The Daily Mail comment section is tying itself up in knots about EU law makers legislating against vegetarian food being allowed to share their names with their meat counterparts.
Who do they hate more, the EU or vegans?

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 22h

That's the nicer option.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 22h

Tea, as in a northern dinner or tea, as in a hot beverage? Because one sounds nicer than the other.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 23h

My youngest has just messaged the family group chat to let us know that he's taken down a St George flag.

a man with a beard and a white shirt is smiling with his eyes closed

Alt: Proud Mr Miyagi.

media.tenor.com

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1d

Bugger. I trust that you will at least be waited on, hand and foot? Hope it's a mild dose.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1d

I get it a lot on my pushbike, but I thought I might be safe to walk on the pavement. It wasn't even a dropped kerb.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1d

Somebody just slowly drove past me as I walked down the street, then immediately over the pavement to park, missing me by inches. Car brained c*nt.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1d

Amongst over things our "Apparatus" had one set of ropes reaching from the floor to almost the ceiling. These were "for climbing, not playing at Tarzan". Only one kid could actually climb a rope. He once fell from the top, onto the skinny mat, and we were all sure he was dead.

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Simon, but spookier. @winklesbloke.bsky.social · 1d

I injured my bum by overeating pickled jalapenos.

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