D.N. Schmidt, sci-fi novelist🪐📚
@dnschmidt.com
4.4K followers 2K following 6.1K posts
Science fiction novelist and humorist. Get my books, free stories, and writing tips at https://dnschmidt.com. Sign up for email updates so you don’t miss a thing! Read The Hole In The Wall: https://dnschmidt.com/science-fiction-stories/hole-in-the-wall/
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dnschmidt.com
‪Still miss Firefly and Cowboy Bebop? Try The Chained Space Series!

In The Screaming Void, a space junk salvage crew risks their sanity searching for a lost ship.

In The Stolen Planet, an ancient weapon points to the biggest theft in history.

#booksky 📚🪐

www.amazon.com/dp/B0FP9TZ69D
The Chained Space Series
Visit Amazon's The Chained Space Series Page and shop for all The Chained Space Series books. Check out pictures, author information, and reviews of The Chained Space Series
www.amazon.com
dnschmidt.com
Apparently they're doing Young Guns 3. Which is a pretty ballsy title, considering the last movie was 35 years ago.

Maybe they should do a prequel instead. "Baby Guns: Bullets & Binkies". Everybody run! It's Billy The Fetus!
dnschmidt.com
4/4

People will love your work, sometimes in spite of the tiny flaws, but very often because of them. Keep growing your skills, but don't worry about every little flaw.

Find your readers, your audience, your fans. They'll love your work, mistakes and all.
dnschmidt.com
3/4

...handmade. The imperfections make his work feel "more real." The tiny flaws are charming. It feels like you can see the potter at work, almost like you're looking over his shoulder and watching him make the bowl.

So if you're a writer or an artist or whatever, don't worry so much.
dnschmidt.com
2/4

When people go to an art fair or farmer's market and they see a "too perfect" bowl, they assume the potter is just reselling manufactured stuff. It feels "fake," like mass produced junk.

When he's a little less careful and leaves in some small imperfections, people know the bowl is...
dnschmidt.com
Here's a good lesson for creative folks:

My wife loves handmade bowls. At the last art fair we went to, we got to talking to a potter, and he admitted that the bowls he sells are intentionally "90% perfect."

He wasn't being lazy. He just knows that "too perfect" bowls actually sell less!

🧵1/4
dnschmidt.com
Some people collect books or stamps. Porter collects lonely people. He wears a long #raincoat, gray as a cloudy sky. He finds folks walking all alone and his magic coat pulls them inside.

I met all my friends inside these plastic pockets. It's nice to finally be included, isn't it?

#vss365
dnschmidt.com
Some spooky season reading for you:

A frustrated writer discovers a spell book that promises endless inspiration. Is the strange being she summons really a Muse, or something far more dangerous?

#booksky #kindle #horror

www.amazon.com/Silverfish-F...
Silverfish: A Fantasy Horror Story
Amazon.com: Silverfish: A Fantasy Horror Story eBook : Schmidt, D.N.: Kindle Store
www.amazon.com
dnschmidt.com
Yep, glad you got the reference! 🐸
Reposted by D.N. Schmidt, sci-fi novelist🪐📚
professormitchell.bsky.social
Here's a reminder that this weekend you can supplement your reading list with the hidden gems in this bundle. There's over 60 stories to enjoy, including science fiction, fantasy, and more, so don't miss out.

itch.io/b/3305/under...
The itch.io Under-Rated Bundle, running from October 9th to October 13th.

The pictured books include (left to right, top to bottom):

NICEF: Neural-Interface Controlled Exo-Frame by PJC Cahill
What May Rise from the Ashes by Susanne Schmidt
Rotten Roots by Susanne Schmidt
Song of the Wolf by T.C. Smith
Scars of the Raven by T.C. Smith
Calliope by Kaylynx
The Star-Crossed Empire by Maya Darjani
Everything is Wonderful Now by Shane Blackheart
Loyalty to the Max by Maya Darjani
Open Wound by Shane Blackheart
The Third People by Lee Burton
Bloody Fantasia by Claris Lam
The Lion by Lee Burton
Refilling the Well by Claris Lam
The Spellking's Heir by Chris Mitchell
The Elefae Champion by Chris Mitchell
Riyati Rebirth by Kai Zeal
Riyati Rivals by Kai Zeal
Bulletproof Heart by Mel Grebing
Black Butterfly by Katie L. Carroll
Only Dark Edges by Katie L. Carroll

There are additional books in the bundle that are not shown here.
dnschmidt.com
Let’s just all consider this huge, mostly unguarded pile of money “off limits,” okay?
dnschmidt.com
Worried about pickpockets? Why don’t we just all give our wallets to the biggest, strongest guy?

Some people think a Designated Wallet Holder will inevitably get robbed, or that he’ll spend our money himself, but we’ll just put up a sign saying That’s Against The Rules.

Perfect plan, right?
dnschmidt.com
I imagine him with a confused “why are they asking me to do this?” look on his face the whole time, like that chef filming the video about how to mix cheese in a bowl.
dnschmidt.com
Yup, you just need a really, really big blender.
dnschmidt.com
A werewolf movie, except it’s a guy who turns into a corgi whenever his wife asks him to do the dishes.

“Sorry, hon, no opposable thumbs! Looks like I have to spend the afternoon napping in a sunbeam again.”
dnschmidt.com
Google: Did you mean “egg sax phase”?
dnschmidt.com
I mean, I guess it’s a “win” if you like regular, boring turtles who don’t know martial arts or anything.
A screenshot of a BBC article showing a swimming turtle and the headline “Green turtle bounces back from the brink in conservation win.” The word “win” is in quotes, which could be taken as it being used ironically.
dnschmidt.com
If you like people in silly costumes fighting evil, you might enjoy this flash piece I wrote earlier this year.
dnschmidt.com
Soon after the T'Chari took over Earth, they filled the air with monitor spheres. Four trillion eyes in the sky.

That's what lead to the Big Shoes Rebellion. To track our movements and prevent us from organizing, they made covering your face illegal. With one exception.

Clown makeup.

(1/4) #vss
dnschmidt.com
These days, it seems like the best way to get rich is to come up with the worst idea ever, so here goes:

* Replace Post Office trucks with mail-flinging trebuchets.

* A combination spa and petting zoo. The masseuse is a badger.

* Uber for piggy back rides.

I can smell the money already!
dnschmidt.com
Every time I see “semiprozine,” I think that should be the name of an allergy medicine.
dnschmidt.com
Greg headed to the aquarium’s mermaid exhibit, grinning.

“You’re full of #verve today,” Luna said, swishing her tail.

“Yes, I’ve been taking fish oil.”

She giggled. “Me too, but I make the fish take me to dinner first.”

He rolled his eyes. “All that water can’t clean a dirty mind.”

#vss365
Reposted by D.N. Schmidt, sci-fi novelist🪐📚
andybasement101.bsky.social
!!!!!***SUPPORT INDIE AUTHORS***!!!!!

#FF @dnschmidt.com and score a copy of his extremely funny and extremely out there #TheyAteTheWaitress? I laughed all the way through.

And look! Two other works are available! At any disreputable book store near you!

Chop! Chop! Hop to it!
Reposted by D.N. Schmidt, sci-fi novelist🪐📚
rexburke.bsky.social
🚨NEW BOX-SET!
The complete Odyssey Earth series – over 1,000 pages of feelgood, found-family space adventure
'Funny, wholesome & uplifting, a laugh-out-loud romp in outer space' @bookspotlight.bsky.social

Pre-order at only £4.99/$5.99 - mybook.to/OdysseyEarth
Out 4 November
#BookSky #SciFi 💙📚🪐
Box set image of the Odyssey Earth series by Rex Burke, with caption - I'm in love with the Odyssey Earth series
dnschmidt.com
My girlfriend and I collect baseball caps from museum gift shops. We have a Louvre hat relationship.
Reposted by D.N. Schmidt, sci-fi novelist🪐📚
alankdell.bsky.social
Grab a new Event Horizon-inspired cosmic horror for #SpookySeason 🎃

A rescue mission to a stranded starship turns into a nightmare for Helene Cross and her crew when their minds are ensnared by an entity from beyond the stars.

books2read.com/thego...
alankdell.itch.io/th...

📢📚 | 🩸📚🪐 | 🤏📚
Tablet mockup of The God Sun on the right in front of a space background of an ominous red dwarf star. On the right are selected review extracts. The text reads: “Brutal, bloody, and disturbing”, “Brilliant read. Well written. 100% recommended”, and “It had that creeping discomfort I’ve come to expect from space sci-fi stories that lean towards the dark side”. Underneath the book, the text reads: “Available widely. Books2read.com/thegodsun.”