Author | Lightnews

Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 12h

It's a gorgeous evening.

Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 1d

Successfully installed our fancy new retractable garden hose with minimal bloodshed (I lost my balance while crouching, tipped over and sliced open a knuckle on my way down)
#winning

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 2d

Error 404
Executive Function Not Found

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Reposted by Short Fuse

Andy @rukira91.bsky.social · 4d

Stop using Halloween as an excuse to dress like a slut. You should be dressing like a slut every day.

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 5d

Hi Hungry
I'm Undad

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 6d

Eldest kiddo is throwing a huge Halloween bash tomorrow night and has talked me up to all their friends, who are now under the mistaken impression that I am cool

Reposted by Short Fuse

Amy New (shop 🔗n bio) @amynewblue.bsky.social · 6d

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 7d

*urge to make beef Wellington with foraged mushrooms rises*

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Reposted by Short Fuse

swearclock ⌚︎ @swearclock.bsky.social · 9d

Fucking Get A Watch You Cunting Fuck Wanks It's 6:00PM

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 8d

Ta :) Ironically, my husband had a business shirt many years ago made from a nearly identical fabric... Nearly cried when I dug through the rag bag in our shed and it was already cut up

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 9d

24 hours ago, it was raining sideways and we were being pelted by hail. Now the air is thick with bushfire smoke and the sun is like blood.

A blood-red sun sets in a haze of smoke above a fence draped with lillipilli and jasmine.

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 9d

Scored this sick button-down at my local dollar store

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 10d

WHEEEEHEEEEHEEEE
TROPICAL STORM SEASON IS UPON US

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 10d

Spotted in Aldi. Don't even know how to use the bloody things 🤷

Three plastic seashell bag clips in cute pastel colours. Insert obligatory Demolition Man Joke here.

Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 12d

Reposted by Short Fuse

ana street rat @uldahstreetrat.bsky.social · 13d

"Oxford commas are a sign you write with ai" I will find such a unique way to rip out your spine that they'll make a movie about it

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Reposted by Short Fuse

Star Swallow @starswallow.bsky.social · 12d

🕯 🎃
👻 🦇

🕸️ Con O'Neill ⁺₊✧
Halloween
🧛‍♂️ selfie 👻

💀 🧡
🔮 🐈‍⬛

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 12d

Weekly Friday afternoon cuppa with the in-laws 🖤

Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 13d

Thank you! 😁

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 14d

Q: What do you call a large spider that's missing two legs and is running the gauntlet in a three-cat household?

A: VERY PISSED OFF.

(Click for a pic if you dare)

A very big, very angry brown huntsman spider. She has a leg span of at least 5 inches.

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 14d

A well-known and much-loved elderly homeless gentleman who camped in his car in our neighbourhood passed away today. The kindness and empathy shown to him over the years by this little community I've called home since childhood warms my soul.
Vale.

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 14d

Husband switched on the overhead light while I was happily pottering about in our darkened kitchen doing my bee chores

He was *not* prepared for the shrieking and hissing that followed.

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 15d

Ooh, nice!

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 15d

Postage might be a bit exxy, alas (I'm in Australia).

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Short Fuse @fn0rdpr3fect.bsky.social · 15d

OMG
I WOULD LOVE YOU FOREVER THANKYOU 😍

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