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@keptsimple.bsky.social

11K followers 570 following 4.9K posts

gave my life to baphomet in a denny's parking lot

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · May 15

the power of friendship is helping me defeat the egg

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 30m

katy perry photographed immediately before assaulting 3 lovable losers in a los angeles bowling alley parking lot

Nathan Kalman-Lamb @nkalamb.bsky.social · 3h

I see the National Post is openly acknowledging it is a tabloid.

Katy Perry and Justin Trudeau spotted kissing on yacht: report

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 33m

if you set your DVR to record an FBI agent would do a tactical roll directly into your living room

m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 44m

maybe not the main thing here but rubbing mint of the most sensitive part of your body doesn't sound pleasant

pfc. italian beef @realbillhicks.bsky.social · 56m

i gotta quite drinking and shopping online

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 46m

trump forgetting he was president on the day he tried to do an autocoup is probably a sign he is not well

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1h

Annie Hall and Manhattan are on MGM+ but who has that

m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1h

If you're thinking of going back and watching Diane Keaton's great performances, none of the following are available on a major ad-free streaming service: Godfather I and 2, Reds, Annie Hall, Looking for Mr. Goodbar, Manhattan, Something's Gotta Give, and Marvin's Room. Garbage future.

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Reposted by m

Microplastics Spookmelier @leastactionhero.bsky.social · 13h

today in "predicted by 30 Rock"

Edie Falco on 30 Rock:
I MISSED THE VOTE ON A BILL TO LEGALIZE RECREATIONAL WHALE TORTURE.

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 19h

congrats Rusty. hope you're enjoying retirement!

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 19h

but he was looking really washed as an nfl coach too

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 19h

a lot of people seem to think that as long as you don't have some diagnosable form of dementia, you're going to be just as sharp as you were at 30. it doesn't work that way. and I'm surprised so many think it does since we almost all know a few older people.

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 19h

as much as anything the predictably disastrous belichick hiring reflects the same rampant denialism about the effects of aging as the biden and trump presidencies

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 19h

that dialogue is actually really corny but she sells it

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 19h

an abortion michael

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 20h

absolute legend

Mark Harris @markharris.bsky.social · 20h

Terribly sad news about one of the greats. Diane Keaton has died at 79.
people.com/diane-keaton...

Diane Keaton, Famed for Roles in 'Father of the Bride,' 'First Wives Club' and More, Dies at 79 (Exclusive)

Diane Keaton has died at age 79. Keaton was best known for roles in movies like 'Annie Hall,' 'The First Wives Club,' 'Something's Gotta Give' and 'The Godfather.'

people.com

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 23h

quietly packing away my "chapel bill" hoodie with my "doherty's disciples" t-shirt

m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

it's called northwestern but it's in the middle of the fucking country. what's that about?

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

bold take on sport peppers but fortunately I don't think there are many chronic posters in Chicago

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

it's always impossible to tell which political reporters are the actual sex abusers because they all talk like serial rapists

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

like are you kidding me with this shit? I've seen you people at bars and restaurants. you all talk like sociopathic pirates. are you kidding me with this shit?

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

every political reporter knows that the jay jones text are on the tame end of how politicians talk in private, not to mention tamer than how trump and his associates talk in public

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

yeah a Fox Nation billboard ruined the otherwise beautiful Roku City skyline for me

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Reposted by m

Spike Friedman @spikefriedman.bsky.social · 1d

My reaction to literally everything happening (public health edition)

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

assumed until today that Mike Lombardi was like a Vince Lombardi fail grandnephew but turns out he's overflowing with unearned arrogance and he's just some guy

m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

if creed turns down the tpusa halftime show I'm declaring a moratorium on making fun of creed

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m @keptsimple.bsky.social · 1d

smart TVs have made this so much worse. so many of these free streaming right wing news channels and many are heavily advertised on the home screen.

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