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STRIDER

@kineticedge.bsky.social

27 followers 23 following 52 posts

🗡️ This user has exceeded their emotional processing bandwidth. Pretending_not_to_dissociate.exe has been terminated. Pfp: https://x.com/brokuma

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · Aug 28

📌 PINNED POST – 𝗗𝗜𝗥𝗞 𝗦𝗧𝗥𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗥

❌ I don’t run ships here. don’t expect them.

✅ Mostly lurking, dropping the occasional dry commentary, poking fun when it feels right, and me watching more than I talk.

🗡️ If you need consistent validation, wrong guy.

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 11d

Princess Karkat is canon.

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 11d

Do it. I'll allow it. Put him in the pinkest, frilliest dress you can conjure. Bonus points if you get photographic evidence.

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 11d

What the fuck are you talking about?

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 11d

Go ahead, siphon it. I regenerate cool consistently. Like a renewable resource.

But if you stand too close you’ll either ascend to my level or be crushed under the weight of pure, concentrated/unfiltered COOL. odds aren’t great for you.

I'm winning either way.

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 11d

[🗡️] Anyways just because the other two are more tolerant and laid back doesn’t mean I am.

Keep killing our vibes and watch how fast I’ll cut you out. consider this your friendly/lethal warning.

It’s NOT our job to teach you how to be self aware.

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 11d

Imagine being your own worst enemy AND your best hype man at the same time.

tragic.
iconic.
✨ me ✨

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 17d

Cool. So what you’re saying is, if we’re doomed to be villains, we might as well look good doing it...

True, true. If I’m destined to be the bad guy in concept, might as well lean into it with
✨ style ✨

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 17d

Get... Thanks. Redacting that s. You didn't see shit.

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 18d

Pickles? Really? That’s the hill you’re dying on?

The only thing I harbor a burning desire for is plausible deniability.

𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐚𝐤𝐚 𝐂𝐲𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐫𝐨 @techopped.bsky.social · 19d

We decided with full confidence that you secretly harbored a burning desire for my pickles. Check, it, dude. It's right there. Page 5640.

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 19d

You picked that date way too confidently. What do you know. What have you done. Who told you.

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 18d

[Staring at Cal.] You know what? Target acquired. Dave, duck.

[deadpan as he immediately launches Cal at Dave with dramatic flourish]

I am legally, morally, and aesthetically allowed to do this. Also it's extremely cathartic.

𝐝𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐫 @cooltimeguy.bsky.social · 18d

shit bro aint no way

burn it

enigmaticIdolizer [EI] @iffywoofs.bsky.social · 18d

DIRK STRIDER THIS ISN'T FUNNY

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 18d

No, yeah, you're right. I don't really care. Just felt like making it about me for 0.5 seconds. As a treat.

If villains gets cooler outfits and monologues, sign me the fuck up.

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 18d

You leave ONE (1) eldritch effigy in someone’s blankets and suddenly you’re the villain.

This is slanderous.

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STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 18d

He’s just like me fr. Shows up uninvited, stares too long, ruins emotional moments. ❤️

Also it's hilarious.

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 18d

If you’re messaging me for ships after my intro explicitly says I don’t do them, congratulations!

You just outed yourself as selectively literate.

STRIDER @kineticedge.bsky.social · 19d

You picked that date way too confidently. What do you know. What have you done. Who told you.

𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐚𝐤𝐚 𝐂𝐲𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐛𝐫𝐨 @techopped.bsky.social · 20d

Do you remember the conversation we had on December 25th, 2012, at 7:09 AM?