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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner
@mattwag.bsky.social
380 followers 1.1K following 980 posts
Recovering news addict trying to focus on other things.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · Oct 17
I see a lot of new users are showing up, and I should probably put this out there.

Do you like legendary comic book creator, Matt Wagner?

So do I!

However, I am a secret other Matt Wagner that is not in any way affiliated with him.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 10h
This is my dance about how much transphobes suck.
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 18h
I’m having a Sherman type day today
inchargeofthegirls.bsky.social
AmeriKraut @inchargeofthegirls.bsky.social · 1d
sherman, for the love of god!
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 20h
Reality TV needs something with some zing!
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Reposted by Matt Wagner
ladybusiness.bsky.social
LadyBusiness @ladybusiness.bsky.social · 20h
TV show idea: Foxxy. In the near future, MAGA leaders have fled the country to escape justice. To bring them to trial, The Pentagon launches a covert squad of former Miss Universe contestants turned elite mercenaries — led by former black ops veteran, Jerrica Foxxy.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
It is of course the French pronunciation
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
Guy!!
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
Is Buzz only a nickname?
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
Me to my wife:

“Sorry babe, you should have know what you signed up for when you married a party guy like me. Sometimes, I’m gonna do drugs*, even on a weeknight and you’re just gonna have to deal with it.”

*A statin and antacid.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
Aha, but you see, destroying those boats is actually preventing a war!

Nevermind that the threatened war would be started by the same person worthy of getting the Peace Prize.

Peace through strength!
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
He should be used to situations like that. After all, Missouri loves company
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2d
“The girlfriend of one of the founders of antifa”
Rosie the Riveter, a painting of a woman wearing a denim work coverall, protective goggles on top of her head, and loafers sitting with a rivet gun in her lap and holding a sandwich. She is sitting in front of a waving flag of the United States of America.
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Reposted by Matt Wagner
ladybusiness.bsky.social
LadyBusiness @ladybusiness.bsky.social · 2d
*Brings cute shoes in your size for 50% off to a knife fight*
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2d
*Brings menu options that have changed to a knife fight, so listen carefully*
frenchys-goldau.bsky.social
Frenchy's ghost prospecting and leader of ANTIFA @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 2d
*Brings low prices and money back guarantees to a knife fight*
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2d
*Brings menu options that have changed to a knife fight, so listen carefully*
frenchys-goldau.bsky.social
Frenchy's ghost prospecting and leader of ANTIFA @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 2d
*Brings low prices and money back guarantees to a knife fight*
theciscokidder.bsky.social
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 2d
*brings updated terms and conditions to a knife fight*
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Reposted by Matt Wagner
outerbororoyal.bsky.social
OuterBoroPrincess @outerbororoyal.bsky.social · 2d
“The girlfriend of one of the founders of antifa.”
Mary Magdalene passing out over the risen Jesus
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2d
I find it interesting that the day the President is saying he has a 57% approval in Rasmussen polling is actually the first time he has had 5 consecutive days of an approval index less than -10.

Rasmussen has never had a 57% approval for him during this administration in their daily tracking.
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 3d
I had a roommate who was obsessed then moved to just drinking Kahlúa straight.

Let me tell you, a dorm room cannot handle the smell of someone throwing up straight Kahlúa all night.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 3d
I don’t know why, but the thought of Jennifer Lopez grabbing anything from Dunkin Donuts seems outlandish and alien, and yet surely it has happened.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
I always think, “Look at all these fun little guys I could play, time to make another human!”
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
Well we now know Keith Urban doesn’t have classic French style
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 5d
Excited for a new Supreme Court term!

Although I do find the official theme of this term to be puzzling:

“Checks AND Balances? In this economy?”
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 5d
It’s so annoying having to repeat yourself.
pantspants.bsky.social
Mr. Joshua @pantspants.bsky.social · 5d
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 6d
My uber is here
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 6d
It’s exhausting filling out the scorecard of every child, but having standards is important.

Plus it will hopefully make some kids think twice about what they choose to wear next year.
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 6d
Fight. Fight. Black Maroon and White.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 6d
Rare sports post from me, but I 100% agree with this. Having the game on in the background has thrown me a couple times tonight.
jasondtx.bsky.social
Jason Voorhees Darr @jasondtx.bsky.social · 6d
If I were coaching Texas A&M right now my half time adjustment would be changing into maroon uniforms so I can stop mixing the teams up.
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