mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner
@mattwag.bsky.social
380 followers 1.1K following 970 posts
Recovering news addict trying to focus on other things.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · Oct 17
I see a lot of new users are showing up, and I should probably put this out there.

Do you like legendary comic book creator, Matt Wagner?

So do I!

However, I am a secret other Matt Wagner that is not in any way affiliated with him.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1h
Aha, but you see, destroying those boats is actually preventing a war!

Nevermind that the threatened war would be started by the same person worthy of getting the Peace Prize.

Peace through strength!
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2h
He should be used to situations like that. After all, Missouri loves company
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 16h
“The girlfriend of one of the founders of antifa”
Rosie the Riveter, a painting of a woman wearing a denim work coverall, protective goggles on top of her head, and loafers sitting with a rivet gun in her lap and holding a sandwich. She is sitting in front of a waving flag of the United States of America.
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Reposted by Matt Wagner
ladybusiness.bsky.social
LadyBusiness @ladybusiness.bsky.social · 16h
*Brings cute shoes in your size for 50% off to a knife fight*
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 17h
*Brings menu options that have changed to a knife fight, so listen carefully*
frenchys-goldau.bsky.social
Frenchy's ghost prospecting and leader of ANTIFA @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 20h
*Brings low prices and money back guarantees to a knife fight*
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 17h
*Brings menu options that have changed to a knife fight, so listen carefully*
frenchys-goldau.bsky.social
Frenchy's ghost prospecting and leader of ANTIFA @frenchys-goldau.bsky.social · 20h
*Brings low prices and money back guarantees to a knife fight*
theciscokidder.bsky.social
Theciscokidder @theciscokidder.bsky.social · 22h
*brings updated terms and conditions to a knife fight*
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Reposted by Matt Wagner
outerbororoyal.bsky.social
OuterBoroPrincess @outerbororoyal.bsky.social · 17h
“The girlfriend of one of the founders of antifa.”
Mary Magdalene passing out over the risen Jesus
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
I find it interesting that the day the President is saying he has a 57% approval in Rasmussen polling is actually the first time he has had 5 consecutive days of an approval index less than -10.

Rasmussen has never had a 57% approval for him during this administration in their daily tracking.
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
I had a roommate who was obsessed then moved to just drinking Kahlúa straight.

Let me tell you, a dorm room cannot handle the smell of someone throwing up straight Kahlúa all night.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 1d
I don’t know why, but the thought of Jennifer Lopez grabbing anything from Dunkin Donuts seems outlandish and alien, and yet surely it has happened.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2d
I always think, “Look at all these fun little guys I could play, time to make another human!”
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 2d
Well we now know Keith Urban doesn’t have classic French style
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 3d
Excited for a new Supreme Court term!

Although I do find the official theme of this term to be puzzling:

“Checks AND Balances? In this economy?”
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
It’s so annoying having to repeat yourself.
pantspants.bsky.social
Mr. Joshua @pantspants.bsky.social · 4d
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
My uber is here
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
It’s exhausting filling out the scorecard of every child, but having standards is important.

Plus it will hopefully make some kids think twice about what they choose to wear next year.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
Fight. Fight. Black Maroon and White.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
Rare sports post from me, but I 100% agree with this. Having the game on in the background has thrown me a couple times tonight.
jasondtx.bsky.social
Jason Voorhees Darr @jasondtx.bsky.social · 4d
If I were coaching Texas A&M right now my half time adjustment would be changing into maroon uniforms so I can stop mixing the teams up.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 4d
Normalize 👏 reading 👏 all 👏 your 👏 texts 👏 aloud 👏 so 👏 it 👏 feels 👏 natural 👏 when 👏 it 👏 happens 👏 on 👏 screen!
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 5d
When I worked in the music industry, we had an incident where someone had left a note pad with a few notes about a release plan for a Kenny Chesney album in a conference room for about 15 minutes before they went back for it

That person faced more consequences than the aide using signal in public.
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Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 5d
Not now rare creature, too much happening right now for us to pay attention to you.
tierno158.bsky.social
SeaTea @tierno158.bsky.social · 5d
This is rarely a good thing.
A news article that says that a rare creature was spotted leaping from the ocean of Japan's Coast.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 6d
I keep a detailed notebook that I can cross reference when deciding what to watch, like a normal person.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 7d
I would not be shocked if this model implies there is an extra leg muscle in some athletes it is tracking.
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 7d
Anyone know where I can get a MSAORCGA hat?
A screenshot of a Truth from Donald J Trump that says: The Soybean Farmers of our Country are being hurt because China is, for "negotiating" reasons only, not buying. We've made so much money on Tariffs, that we are going to take a small portion of that money, and help our Farmers. I WILL NEVER LET OUR FARMERS DOWN! Sleepy Joe Biden didn't enforce our Agreement with China, where they were going to purchase Billions of Dollars of our Farm Product, but Soybeans, in particular. It's all going to work out very well. I LOVE OUR PATRIOTS, AND EVERY FARMER IS EXACTLY THAT! I'll be meeting with President Xi, of China, in four weeks, and Soybeans will be a major topic of discussion. MAKE SOYBEANS, AND OTHER ROW CROPS, GREAT AGAIN!
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mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 8d
Epic handshake meme with Donald Trump and Cardi B agreeing on Posting DMs on main
mattwag.bsky.social
Matt Wagner @mattwag.bsky.social · 8d
The benefit of having them all in the same place is that they can have sidebar conversations about how to respond to blatantly unconstitutional orders when told to fire on American citizens.