Author | Lightnews

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 17h

[running my ship aground to get to the Sirens] They're simply exercising their First Amendment speech rights in the sanctity of their own home.

John Wiswell @wiswell.bsky.social · 1d

[gesturing to Orpheus] Now it's a crime for a guy to look at his girlfriend?

Cat Manning @catacalypto.bsky.social · 1d

[looking at Circe] god forbid women have hobbies

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Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 17h

Describe a character in Greek mythology the way someone trying to defend a politician would.

Theseus: We need to stop with all these purity tests if we ever hope to win back power. You think any of the cretins we're up against care if their ship is still the same ship?

Total Lowlife Hat @kenwhite.bsky.social · 1d

Cronus: oh so you're never hungry? You never eat?

Adam Serwer @adamserwer.bsky.social · 1d

Describe a character in Greek mythology the way someone trying to defend a politician would. I’ll start.

Oedipus: Like you’ve never had sex with someone and regretted it later

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 1d

"They cheated on a commercial. Those frogs hated Budweiser and they said they didn't. They actually preferred Coors Light. 'Tap the Rockies,' that's what they used to say. They'd come into the restaurant in Trump Tower and say 'Tap the Rockies for us, Mr. Trump'. Can you believe it?"

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d

Trump: "They cheated on a commercial. Ronald Reagan loved tariffs and they said he didn't. And I guess it was AI or something. They cheated badly. Canada got caught cheating on a commercial. Can you believe it?"

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Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 1d

Oh no, he managed to survive the Swifties and now he's challenging the kpop stans.

Matt Novak @paleofuture.bsky.social · 1d

Trump appears to have hit send prematurely

Trump: Just in: Documents show conclusively that Christopher Wray, Merrill Garland, Lisa
23 ReTruths
85 Likes
10/24/25, 6:46 PM

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 2d

Wow, all this time I thought he never got past first base.

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 2d

🎶She likes shoes for feet
Not because they’re worn by Leonardo
Or that guy who played in Fargo, I think his name is Steve🎶

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 2d

Some people might think the alt text is referring to a convention but we know you’re actually preparing to fleece some rubes.

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 3d

I have an idea for who they can get to cook the meal, though it's kind of hard to find her since she has no name.

Chicago Tribune @chicagotribune.com · 5d

U.S. Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem on Monday criticized the media and politicians, including Gov. JB Pritzker, for “trying to demonize” federal immigration agents and she urged citizens to thank law enforcement officers and “cook a meal for their families.”

DHS Secretary Kristi Noem accuses Gov. JB Pritzker and media of ‘trying to demonize’ immigration officers

Speaking in Florida, Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem criticized Illinois Gov. JB Pritzker and the media, and she urged citizens to thank law enforcement officers and “cook the…

trib.al

Reposted by Robert Hanley

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · Oct 4

MAD DOCTOR’S LOVE SONG

I shall be tied forever to the dead,
Reanimated flesh, life born again.
(Because I dreamed you up inside my head.)

The stupid, pesky villagers see red,
With pitchforks and with torches barging in:
I shall be tied forever to the dead.

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Reposted by Robert Hanley

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · Oct 13

And all the spooky scary skeletons and grim grinning ghosts will look up and shout "Mr. Purple People Eater, don’t eat me!"... and I'll look down, and whisper "Whatever happened to my Transylvania Twist?"

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Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 15d

I'm a few episodes behind, so I just listened to it yesterday. Such a great story.

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 20d

Earth! Fire! Wind! Water! Heart!

CNBC @cnbc.com · 20d

To shut down rude behavior instantly, try a simple yet powerful five-word response.

Use this 5-word phrase when someone is rude to you—it's like 'holding up a mirror,' says public speaking expert

When we encounter a rude person, our first instinct might be to fire back with a snarky comment. But that's not the right move, says public speaking expert John Bowe. Here's the perfect response to instantly shut down rude behavior.

cnb.cx

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Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 22d

Was you ever bit by a dead Koopa?

Robert Hanley @robertbhanley.bsky.social · 24d

This was my first thought when I read this. My second was to wonder if you'd commented on it yet. I'm catching up on the podcast and am still several years behind, so I just finished the Blacklist season and wish it wasn't so relevant (though I appreciate having the historical context).

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