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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift

@sgtopie.bsky.social

1.2K followers 1.4K following 3K posts

Midnight patrol supervisor in a small town. USAF vet. Former K9 handler. Shelter dog adopter. Craft beer nerd. Orioles and Ravens fan. Everton fan. Gen X music (79-89) is undefeated. Painter of miniature plastic doodads.

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · Apr 22

Doing some miniature painting therapy on my day off. #Zombicide #TheArmyPainter

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 12m

Finally!! What took you so long @riotgrlerin.bsky.social ?

RiotGrlErin @riotgrlerin.bsky.social · 2h

characters leaving pornhub comments: thread

Cookie Monster eating cookies and talking about cum.

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 23m

Just like “the smartest people in the world don’t have to tell you how smart they are.”

Richard Signorelli 🌱💙🇨🇦🇺🇦🇺🇸 @richsignorelli.bsky.social · 21h

If you are deranged enough to obsessively lobby for a Nobel Peace Prize, then you should be automatically disqualified from receiving it.

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 26m

Want to do laundry, but, doing anything that involves more than two steps to complete seems like a hassle right now.

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 55m

a dog is sitting on a rug with the words no no no on it .

ALT: a dog is sitting on a rug with the words no no no on it .

media.tenor.com

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1h

Natch. 😎

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1h

a man with a tie dye shirt says incredibly horrible

ALT: a man with a tie dye shirt says incredibly horrible

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1h

Ma’am, have you SEEN The Ravens play lately? 😂🤮🤬

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1h

Hallelujah

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Reposted by Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift

Albumism @albumism.com · 1h

What's the first word that comes to mind when you think of this album? | Listen to the album + explore our tribute here: album.ink/JBGrace

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1h

The WHOLE postcode, you say?

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 2h

Fucking GHOULS 🤬

George Conway 👊🇺🇸🔥 @gtconway.bsky.social · 2h

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 3h

🎵You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin’. 🎵

a man playing a double bass next to another man playing a guitar with the words chickity china the chinese chicken

ALT: a man playing a double bass next to another man playing a guitar with the words chickity china the chinese chicken

media.tenor.com

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 9h

40 YEARS!! 🥰

Albumism @albumism.com · 10h

Sade released "The Sweetest Taboo" as the first single from 'Promise' 40 years ago on October 12, 1985 | Watch the official video, listen to the album + revisit our tribute here: album.ink/SadePromise

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 23h

Are heaven horses dead horses or something else entirely like how seahorses are horses but not horses?

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

Time to make the donuts! 🎧 music.apple.com/us/album/sen...

Sen by Slowwves on Apple Music

Song · 2024 · Duration 4:48

music.apple.com

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

Block everyone then turn of replies. BLISS.

Reposted by Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift

Scott Johnson @scottjohnson.zip · 1d

Legend.

100 years ago news @100yearsagonews.bsky.social · 1d

Oct. 11, 1925: Elmore Leonard, a master of the crime genre known for terse prose, gritty realism and crisp dialogue, is born in New Orleans. Among his many novels were “Get Shorty,” “Glitz,” and “Rum Punch;” his writings were also the basis for “3:10 to Yuma” and “Justified.”

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Reposted by Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift

Seth Abramson @sethabramson.bsky.social · 1d

Too much truth in one meme

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

HELL YES!!
However…
You could put 500 Almond Joy or Mounds bars in front of me, lock me in a room, and come back in a week and I’ll be dead, and there’ll be 500 Almond Joy bars stacked in front of my gamey corpse. 🤮🤣🤣

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

I’m weak… I can’t say NO to Kit Kat bars and Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

Every year I buy a bag of Halloween candy the first week of October so I’m not scrambling around on October 29th looking for a bag for trick or treat-ers.
This year, the bag lasted until <checks calendar> TODAY.

homer simpson says oh just thinking about that sweet sweet candy in front of a clock

ALT: homer simpson says oh just thinking about that sweet sweet candy in front of a clock

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

I get it for international competition. Olympics. Tournament Rugby. World Cup. Hell- I’ll even give you the fucking X-Games.
But, Falcons-Jets at MB Stadium in Atlanta??

a man is holding a microphone and making a funny face .

ALT: a man is holding a microphone and making a funny face .

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

OH MY GOD WHY ARE WE STILL DOING THIS AT SPORTING EVENTS ITS NOT LIKE WE ARE RUNNING A CAMPAIGN TO SELL WAR BONDS JESUS CHRIST HOW COME WE DON’T ALL STAND UP AND SAY THE PLEDGE OF ALLIANCE BEFORE OUR GRANDKIDS PEE WEE SOCCER GAMES?!?!

Mrs. Betty Bowers @mrsbettybowers.bsky.social · 1d

Hey, you idiotic propagandists at the New York Post:

God Bless America isn't the national anthem. It's a SHOW TUNE written by Irving Berlin.

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

spongebob squarepants is standing on a wooden floor next to patrick star and a fish .

ALT: spongebob squarepants is standing on a wooden floor next to patrick star and a fish .

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Sgt Ed, Mayberry PD Midnight Shift @sgtopie.bsky.social · 1d

It’s really “meat dependent,” tho, right? I mean, only a psychopath is putting Thousand Island on an Italian Cold Cut, right? Right??? 😂