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Tart Attack

@tartattack.bsky.social

590 followers 630 following 3.1K posts

he/him | posting laffs and japes without thinking too much about it | movie takes zone: https://letterboxd.com/SaltLiquor/ pfp: Aert Schouman black cockatoo | banner: Walter Crane illustration of Beauty and the Beast

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Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 12m

take me where the onions are in bloom

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Garrot @garrot.bsky.social · 4h

riding my vacuous yet reliable beast

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𝕯𝖚𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖔𝖓𝖑𝖚𝖘𝖙.˚⊹.🎃₊˚𖦹⋆ @dungeonlust.com · Oct 19

Art by • Bruce Pennington

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"soft wood" bitch mahogany™ @dommedeluise.bsky.social · 17h

the new american flag is calvin peeing on the old flag

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Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 14h

a prophet is just someone who sees the instability of the world around them and asks "how can this get me laid"

Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 14h

if the war had gone on much longer would have started seeing prototype suits called the Boon Doggle

Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 19h

convening an Acceptable Fantasy Writing constitutional convention. first item on the agenda: which sword types are permissible and which are bullshit. scimitars on notice

Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 19h

it's actually cool if you the president post a video about being a king with a sword or some bullshit, so long as i can dress up as george washington and shoot you with a musket. marquis de lafayette costume also acceptable

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𝕯𝖚𝖓𝖌𝖊𝖔𝖓𝖑𝖚𝖘𝖙.˚⊹.🎃₊˚𖦹⋆ @dungeonlust.com · 20h

Art by • Anton Pieck

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Orcius @orcius01.bsky.social · 1d

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Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 1d

seeing someone use actual yellow pages in a film is my Ratatouille zoom-in memory moment

Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 1d

does anyone make feathers that are also indestructible when being chewed on? asking for a cat

Tart Attack @tartattack.bsky.social · 1d

watching, the entire hair segment is hysterical, from Stacy Keach envying a long-haired dog to David Warner cooing to his insecure ass about the "primal power" of hair and lookling like a "stallion"

Movie poster for "Body Bags" (1993). A long-haired, one-eyed and cadaverous John Carpenter holds an eyeball over a corpse in a body bag, while figures in gruesome scenes fill the background.

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Deepak Choppa @adamsandler.click · 1d

after many years of consideration we here at PopCap Games have done what we previously thought impossible: we have created an M-rated peggle. the balls Fuck in it.