Amy Malkoff
@amalkoff.bsky.social
Pithy takes on: music • me • politics • comedy • pop culture • science. My anonymous handle just happens to also be my real name.
I had no idea I was thanked in Mark's amazing new (bestselling) book. Good thing I read acknowledgements! Thanks and congrats, Mark! And everyone reading this: get the book!
February 17, 2026 at 12:36 AM
I had no idea I was thanked in Mark's amazing new (bestselling) book. Good thing I read acknowledgements! Thanks and congrats, Mark! And everyone reading this: get the book!
When you're driving on a narrow, 2-lane road, and there's a truck blocking your lane, **the car driving towards you in the other direction (the unobstructed lane)** has the right of way. That's all.
February 16, 2026 at 7:00 PM
When you're driving on a narrow, 2-lane road, and there's a truck blocking your lane, **the car driving towards you in the other direction (the unobstructed lane)** has the right of way. That's all.
"[My partner] is my whole life" = romantic, heartwarming and sweet
"I have no life without a partner" = sad, don't say that out loud, see a therapist, just be happy on your own
See the discrepancy here?
"I have no life without a partner" = sad, don't say that out loud, see a therapist, just be happy on your own
See the discrepancy here?
February 16, 2026 at 3:45 PM
"[My partner] is my whole life" = romantic, heartwarming and sweet
"I have no life without a partner" = sad, don't say that out loud, see a therapist, just be happy on your own
See the discrepancy here?
"I have no life without a partner" = sad, don't say that out loud, see a therapist, just be happy on your own
See the discrepancy here?
Please hire real designers for your websites, print material, EP art, social media assets, etc. Real people with experience > quickly generated, lifeless AI slop
February 15, 2026 at 2:54 PM
Please hire real designers for your websites, print material, EP art, social media assets, etc. Real people with experience > quickly generated, lifeless AI slop
Pretty sure that hell is just rooms filled with Rae Dunn decor, all with that dumb spindly font on a white background, maybe saying things like, ""HOT" and "REPENT" 😀
February 15, 2026 at 2:48 AM
Pretty sure that hell is just rooms filled with Rae Dunn decor, all with that dumb spindly font on a white background, maybe saying things like, ""HOT" and "REPENT" 😀
Reposted by Amy Malkoff
valentine's day isn't just for couples, it's also a day to celebrate love. for instance, i would love it if housing prices came down.
February 14, 2026 at 8:11 PM
valentine's day isn't just for couples, it's also a day to celebrate love. for instance, i would love it if housing prices came down.
I'm in mourning. Just used up the last of the (seasonal) salted maple cold foam. Bring it back, Trader Joe's!
February 14, 2026 at 4:36 PM
I'm in mourning. Just used up the last of the (seasonal) salted maple cold foam. Bring it back, Trader Joe's!
My conditioner is either being discontinued or very difficult to find, and that's sending me into a mild panic. This is what happens when you grow up w/curly/textured hair in an era when ZERO products existed for my hair, ZERO stylists knew how to cut it, + long, straight hair was the platonic ideal
February 13, 2026 at 2:32 PM
My conditioner is either being discontinued or very difficult to find, and that's sending me into a mild panic. This is what happens when you grow up w/curly/textured hair in an era when ZERO products existed for my hair, ZERO stylists knew how to cut it, + long, straight hair was the platonic ideal
Oops, All Berries is the best cereal. That is all.
February 13, 2026 at 1:12 PM
Oops, All Berries is the best cereal. That is all.
"We're Gen X! We don't need trigger warnings!" Yeah, we also grew up in a culture that didn't recognize bullying, or autism, or the need for...hydration, so yeah, not everything about our childhood requires bragging or rebranding
February 13, 2026 at 12:53 PM
"We're Gen X! We don't need trigger warnings!" Yeah, we also grew up in a culture that didn't recognize bullying, or autism, or the need for...hydration, so yeah, not everything about our childhood requires bragging or rebranding
Just a reminder that the US is not, in fact, a "Christian nation", that we have freedom of - and FROM - religion, and that separation of church and state still exists (at least as of now)
February 12, 2026 at 4:16 PM
Just a reminder that the US is not, in fact, a "Christian nation", that we have freedom of - and FROM - religion, and that separation of church and state still exists (at least as of now)
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds"...
(there are no weather events at or between the two locations)
(there are no weather events at or between the two locations)
February 12, 2026 at 1:31 PM
"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds"...
(there are no weather events at or between the two locations)
(there are no weather events at or between the two locations)
20% off sale on my jewelry and clothing on Etsy! All made by me using all manner of materials, from pearls and semi-precious stones, to vintage pieces, glass, copper and other types of wire. Clothing is all cotton. Sale runs for the next two weeks. www.etsy.com/shop/TinType...
February 11, 2026 at 6:12 PM
20% off sale on my jewelry and clothing on Etsy! All made by me using all manner of materials, from pearls and semi-precious stones, to vintage pieces, glass, copper and other types of wire. Clothing is all cotton. Sale runs for the next two weeks. www.etsy.com/shop/TinType...
I'm not a fan of nicknames that are supposed to be cutting but are really just unfunny, eg referring to Facebook as "Faceplant" ON FACEBOOK is certainly...something
February 11, 2026 at 2:39 PM
I'm not a fan of nicknames that are supposed to be cutting but are really just unfunny, eg referring to Facebook as "Faceplant" ON FACEBOOK is certainly...something
"I'm really competitive" = 🚩
February 11, 2026 at 1:32 PM
"I'm really competitive" = 🚩
In general, I'm anti-doxxing, but since this regime has encouraged racists to proudly shout hate with their whole chests, I'm all for it, and consequences.
February 10, 2026 at 1:32 PM
In general, I'm anti-doxxing, but since this regime has encouraged racists to proudly shout hate with their whole chests, I'm all for it, and consequences.
In 1982, The Love Boat had an episode about a trans character*. I've seen it a handful of times, and am always surprised at what a sympathetic and compassionate portrayal it was, on a network show, in the early 80s.
*played by Mackenzie Phillips, but I still give them all the props
*played by Mackenzie Phillips, but I still give them all the props
February 9, 2026 at 10:05 PM
In 1982, The Love Boat had an episode about a trans character*. I've seen it a handful of times, and am always surprised at what a sympathetic and compassionate portrayal it was, on a network show, in the early 80s.
*played by Mackenzie Phillips, but I still give them all the props
*played by Mackenzie Phillips, but I still give them all the props
Saw a hydrangea tumbleweed tumbling down the street covered in feet of snow. Thanks, tumbleweed, for the reminder of summer
February 8, 2026 at 6:12 PM
Saw a hydrangea tumbleweed tumbling down the street covered in feet of snow. Thanks, tumbleweed, for the reminder of summer
Vacant, soulless person who came up with (or approved) the comically named program "Be Best" is the subject of a vacant, soulless documentary. (Propaganda) news at 11.
February 8, 2026 at 12:24 PM
Vacant, soulless person who came up with (or approved) the comically named program "Be Best" is the subject of a vacant, soulless documentary. (Propaganda) news at 11.
"ICE is a jobs program for the MAGA base" - @heatherlofthouse.bsky.social
February 7, 2026 at 4:24 PM
"ICE is a jobs program for the MAGA base" - @heatherlofthouse.bsky.social
I'm gonna need one of these 🍁 coats, not because I'm Canadian but because I ❤️ maple
February 7, 2026 at 2:16 AM
I'm gonna need one of these 🍁 coats, not because I'm Canadian but because I ❤️ maple
I've never once watched a Superbowl (sometimes I tune in for the halftime show), and I love that for me. I also love that other people love it. We all get our own things.
February 6, 2026 at 4:12 PM
I've never once watched a Superbowl (sometimes I tune in for the halftime show), and I love that for me. I also love that other people love it. We all get our own things.
Please help our friend Chris Chandler if you can. He's been creating important and beautiful art for decades and the world needs more of it. www.gofundme.com/f/help-chand...
Donate to Help Chandler Heal From Traumatic Brain Injury, organized by Amy Sue Berlin
Hi everyone! Our beloved friend, Chris Chandler took a terrible fall whi… Amy Sue Berlin needs your support for Help Chandler Heal From Traumatic Brain Injury
www.gofundme.com
February 6, 2026 at 1:00 PM
Please help our friend Chris Chandler if you can. He's been creating important and beautiful art for decades and the world needs more of it. www.gofundme.com/f/help-chand...
The existence of the White House press corps implies that there's some cohesion, some solidarity among the lot. But let's see if any one of them brings up this racist video post, or backs up the reporter who mentions it. I'm guessing it won't happen. What an embarrassment.
February 6, 2026 at 12:25 PM
The existence of the White House press corps implies that there's some cohesion, some solidarity among the lot. But let's see if any one of them brings up this racist video post, or backs up the reporter who mentions it. I'm guessing it won't happen. What an embarrassment.
Reposted by Amy Malkoff
Trump has posted on Truth Social about 65 times in the last 90 minutes, including a video he posted at 8:44 PM PT describing election fraud lies that shows racist AI images of Michelle and Barack Obama as monkeys at the end. I’ve confirmed this is real and watched it myself.
25th Amendment now.
25th Amendment now.
February 6, 2026 at 6:06 AM
Trump has posted on Truth Social about 65 times in the last 90 minutes, including a video he posted at 8:44 PM PT describing election fraud lies that shows racist AI images of Michelle and Barack Obama as monkeys at the end. I’ve confirmed this is real and watched it myself.
25th Amendment now.
25th Amendment now.