Evan Rossi
@applecart.bsky.social
Stand up and sketch comedy. Radioman on the radio. Ugly tape based media mangle as DAKTYLOI. Sometimes other things. Don't worry about it.
DAKTYLOI.bandcamp.com if you want a bad time.
DAKTYLOI.bandcamp.com if you want a bad time.
Pinned
Evan Rossi
@applecart.bsky.social
· Oct 15
One Bakelite Mazard, by DAKTYLOI
2 track album
daktyloi.bandcamp.com
Harsh ambience, haunted psychedelic soundscapes, concrete posturing, plunderphonics and electroacoustic bangs n' clangs make up "One Bakelite Mazard", the 34th Bulletin from DAKTYLOI.
Free to stream and download.
Feedback is welcome and appreciated.
daktyloi.bandcamp.com/album/one-ba...
Free to stream and download.
Feedback is welcome and appreciated.
daktyloi.bandcamp.com/album/one-ba...
Intrusive morning thought: (Frank Black voice) I wanna fuck in a Gravitron.
December 18, 2025 at 5:55 PM
Intrusive morning thought: (Frank Black voice) I wanna fuck in a Gravitron.
My brother is color blind. I am not. Which, growing up, made him dullish rust-red with envy
December 18, 2025 at 12:00 AM
My brother is color blind. I am not. Which, growing up, made him dullish rust-red with envy
FOR SALE: One well loved Starship 4000.
WARNING: This WILL NOT WORK as an anime-style gravity chamber for EXTREME MARTIAL ARTS TRAINING, and let me tell you it doesn't matter what kind of music you play inside it.
You'll need to bring a trailer & give me 72 hours to move out.
WARNING: This WILL NOT WORK as an anime-style gravity chamber for EXTREME MARTIAL ARTS TRAINING, and let me tell you it doesn't matter what kind of music you play inside it.
You'll need to bring a trailer & give me 72 hours to move out.
December 16, 2025 at 4:56 PM
FOR SALE: One well loved Starship 4000.
WARNING: This WILL NOT WORK as an anime-style gravity chamber for EXTREME MARTIAL ARTS TRAINING, and let me tell you it doesn't matter what kind of music you play inside it.
You'll need to bring a trailer & give me 72 hours to move out.
WARNING: This WILL NOT WORK as an anime-style gravity chamber for EXTREME MARTIAL ARTS TRAINING, and let me tell you it doesn't matter what kind of music you play inside it.
You'll need to bring a trailer & give me 72 hours to move out.
You can capture carbon with chemical looping and oxyfuel combustion, and that's fine it's just that I'm happy with my big net.
December 16, 2025 at 3:45 PM
You can capture carbon with chemical looping and oxyfuel combustion, and that's fine it's just that I'm happy with my big net.
REAL QUICK RESTAURANT REVIEW:
Doppler's Chops in Ft. Lauderdale Florida.
Pros: The menus are made of grass fed bison jerky & there was D Yellow Swans on the jukebox.
Cons: The bar stools are all Judas Cradles.
8.5/10
Doppler's Chops in Ft. Lauderdale Florida.
Pros: The menus are made of grass fed bison jerky & there was D Yellow Swans on the jukebox.
Cons: The bar stools are all Judas Cradles.
8.5/10
December 12, 2025 at 11:29 PM
REAL QUICK RESTAURANT REVIEW:
Doppler's Chops in Ft. Lauderdale Florida.
Pros: The menus are made of grass fed bison jerky & there was D Yellow Swans on the jukebox.
Cons: The bar stools are all Judas Cradles.
8.5/10
Doppler's Chops in Ft. Lauderdale Florida.
Pros: The menus are made of grass fed bison jerky & there was D Yellow Swans on the jukebox.
Cons: The bar stools are all Judas Cradles.
8.5/10
Telling people that you're "working smarter, not harder" as a way to hand-wave your erectile dysfunction.
December 12, 2025 at 6:15 PM
Telling people that you're "working smarter, not harder" as a way to hand-wave your erectile dysfunction.
I can realistically cry on camera by accessing a powerfully emotional memory. The Rockapella Folgers commercial from 1998.
December 12, 2025 at 5:03 PM
I can realistically cry on camera by accessing a powerfully emotional memory. The Rockapella Folgers commercial from 1998.
Barred from the Mad Libs National Championship qualifying rounds because I kept using Toyotathon as both a holiday and as an adjective, "despite being repeatedly warned".
December 11, 2025 at 4:32 PM
Barred from the Mad Libs National Championship qualifying rounds because I kept using Toyotathon as both a holiday and as an adjective, "despite being repeatedly warned".
Proud to work with America's largest chicken chain. The chicken chain is used to drive a 3,000 ton capacity chicken carousel for the laying of undersea chicken pipe & umbilical chicken cable for the offshore chicken industry. It's a pretty big chicken chain.
December 10, 2025 at 11:21 PM
Proud to work with America's largest chicken chain. The chicken chain is used to drive a 3,000 ton capacity chicken carousel for the laying of undersea chicken pipe & umbilical chicken cable for the offshore chicken industry. It's a pretty big chicken chain.
Come down to the Bone Circus.
It might SOUND scary, but don't worry, it's just a circus! A circus themed around bones & skeletons & a skeleton ringmaster & skeleton clowns & the skeleton clowns removing your bones to make more skeleton clowns while you scream "NOOOOOOOO!". It's not a big deal.
It might SOUND scary, but don't worry, it's just a circus! A circus themed around bones & skeletons & a skeleton ringmaster & skeleton clowns & the skeleton clowns removing your bones to make more skeleton clowns while you scream "NOOOOOOOO!". It's not a big deal.
December 10, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Come down to the Bone Circus.
It might SOUND scary, but don't worry, it's just a circus! A circus themed around bones & skeletons & a skeleton ringmaster & skeleton clowns & the skeleton clowns removing your bones to make more skeleton clowns while you scream "NOOOOOOOO!". It's not a big deal.
It might SOUND scary, but don't worry, it's just a circus! A circus themed around bones & skeletons & a skeleton ringmaster & skeleton clowns & the skeleton clowns removing your bones to make more skeleton clowns while you scream "NOOOOOOOO!". It's not a big deal.
An oncologist delivers bad news, but tries to do it dramatically by quickly removing her glasses after a beat, but...BUT she forgot about the neon yellow Croakies around her neck & manages to smash her own head on her desk. This cures the cancer, because they say laughter is the best chemotherapy.
December 9, 2025 at 11:03 PM
An oncologist delivers bad news, but tries to do it dramatically by quickly removing her glasses after a beat, but...BUT she forgot about the neon yellow Croakies around her neck & manages to smash her own head on her desk. This cures the cancer, because they say laughter is the best chemotherapy.
New sounds from DAKTYLOI. Tape loops, CD deck, ream of paper, some other things.
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #noise
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #noise
D358 - VELLUS
DAKTYLOI
Sound rake plus mulch spreader.
Ecstatic headphone daymares.
Harsh concrète posturing, what with all the MATERIALS.
Glossless dark ambient toxic nostalgia mud.
Weaponized memory.
Hauntologica
soundcloud.com
December 9, 2025 at 7:00 PM
New sounds from DAKTYLOI. Tape loops, CD deck, ream of paper, some other things.
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #noise
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #noise
Coast Guard keeps harassing me for operating a food truck on a sandbar, 1/2 a mile off the coast of Panama City Beach. Could be any number of reasons. It's super illegal, the truck and generators are diesel; I use CRISPR GMO ultra-cilantro in the Manatee Banh Mi or it's my Fuck Manatees shirt.
December 8, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Coast Guard keeps harassing me for operating a food truck on a sandbar, 1/2 a mile off the coast of Panama City Beach. Could be any number of reasons. It's super illegal, the truck and generators are diesel; I use CRISPR GMO ultra-cilantro in the Manatee Banh Mi or it's my Fuck Manatees shirt.
Gus Wieby: Jerky Sommelier
December 8, 2025 at 5:26 PM
Gus Wieby: Jerky Sommelier
Keep your trendy Stanley or Yeti cups I've been drinking out of this WWF Undertaker edition Super Soaker for over 20 years. It doesn't keep the coffee hot & it's pretty messy to drink from & I've never known how to clean it out properly so it smells bad but on the other hand go fuck yourself.
December 8, 2025 at 4:43 PM
Keep your trendy Stanley or Yeti cups I've been drinking out of this WWF Undertaker edition Super Soaker for over 20 years. It doesn't keep the coffee hot & it's pretty messy to drink from & I've never known how to clean it out properly so it smells bad but on the other hand go fuck yourself.
Damn it that opera had a post credit aria I left too soon.
December 8, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Damn it that opera had a post credit aria I left too soon.
This one is hard to explain, but I'd like a restaurant where everything sprung out from a bunch of different panels, like an automat but with people so also like the Laugh In joke wall, but for BBQ. Or maybe dumplings. Or maybe YCDTOT with the lockers. Dammit, I told you it was hard to explain!
December 5, 2025 at 10:30 PM
This one is hard to explain, but I'd like a restaurant where everything sprung out from a bunch of different panels, like an automat but with people so also like the Laugh In joke wall, but for BBQ. Or maybe dumplings. Or maybe YCDTOT with the lockers. Dammit, I told you it was hard to explain!
The best part of waking up is dissociating as the hot shower water hits the back of your neck while you murmur and screech math sounds. I call this Autechre Mornings, and they're not just for mornings! Have an Autechre morning, everyone!
December 5, 2025 at 6:43 PM
The best part of waking up is dissociating as the hot shower water hits the back of your neck while you murmur and screech math sounds. I call this Autechre Mornings, and they're not just for mornings! Have an Autechre morning, everyone!
I wrote, ON SPEC, a 5 season treatment for a prestige drama about an American Girl Doll based cargo cult, which got lost piloting my ultralight over the Gobi, and became the foundational text for a new society of desert maniacs.
December 5, 2025 at 5:58 PM
I wrote, ON SPEC, a 5 season treatment for a prestige drama about an American Girl Doll based cargo cult, which got lost piloting my ultralight over the Gobi, and became the foundational text for a new society of desert maniacs.
Now wait a minute, hold your horses. Let's not jump to conclusions. Just because I don't like Sunny Delight doesn't mean I'm Team Purple Stuff; that's a pretty binary way of- oh the horses got loose, wow look at that. Shit they're heading for the highway.
December 4, 2025 at 11:37 PM
Now wait a minute, hold your horses. Let's not jump to conclusions. Just because I don't like Sunny Delight doesn't mean I'm Team Purple Stuff; that's a pretty binary way of- oh the horses got loose, wow look at that. Shit they're heading for the highway.
There's this little plastic container with a foil top attached to me and I've just noticed it for the first time. Went back and found it's in my photos, baby photos even. Friends all confirmed. Opened it up a bit to look. Turns out I came with a dipping sauce this whole time. WHO KNEW?
December 4, 2025 at 9:07 PM
There's this little plastic container with a foil top attached to me and I've just noticed it for the first time. Went back and found it's in my photos, baby photos even. Friends all confirmed. Opened it up a bit to look. Turns out I came with a dipping sauce this whole time. WHO KNEW?
Working on my horror movie and I hit a wall finding the best way to portray the foreboding atmosphere of the old fishing village & the broken bleakness of its inhabitants, then it dawned on me: Mark Weiner style live-head puppetry.
@a24movies.bsky.social or Mark Weiner, please get in contact.
@a24movies.bsky.social or Mark Weiner, please get in contact.
December 4, 2025 at 5:06 PM
Working on my horror movie and I hit a wall finding the best way to portray the foreboding atmosphere of the old fishing village & the broken bleakness of its inhabitants, then it dawned on me: Mark Weiner style live-head puppetry.
@a24movies.bsky.social or Mark Weiner, please get in contact.
@a24movies.bsky.social or Mark Weiner, please get in contact.
If you have gauged ears get in contact; your lobe hammocks are the perfect candidates to test drive my new 5G blocking orgonite skull-pucks!
December 3, 2025 at 3:13 PM
If you have gauged ears get in contact; your lobe hammocks are the perfect candidates to test drive my new 5G blocking orgonite skull-pucks!
New Dispatch from DAKTYLOI. VHS audio. Antique pinball table. Tape loops.
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #ambient
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #ambient
D357 - ORGANIZED
DAKTYLOI
Sound rake plus mulch spreader.
Ecstatic headphone daymares.
Harsh concrète posturing, what with all the MATERIALS.
Glossless dark ambient toxic nostalgia mud.
Weaponized memory.
Hauntologica
soundcloud.com
December 2, 2025 at 5:48 PM
New Dispatch from DAKTYLOI. VHS audio. Antique pinball table. Tape loops.
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #ambient
soundcloud.com/daktyloi/d35...
#soundcloud #experimental #ambient
No one likes my rapping one continuous drone for 3 minutes. Hard to make rap friends when your flow is laminar.
December 2, 2025 at 3:55 PM
No one likes my rapping one continuous drone for 3 minutes. Hard to make rap friends when your flow is laminar.