Bart King
@bartking.bsky.social
• New books, Spring 2026: “Father Humor” (the history of an art form, with jokes!) and an upcoming “Choose Your Own Adventure” 🐢🐢🐢🐢
• “Arguably one of Oregon’s top 73 Barts.” –Barts Weekly 🧃
https://bartking.net 🐸
• “Arguably one of Oregon’s top 73 Barts.” –Barts Weekly 🧃
https://bartking.net 🐸
Pinned
ME: Give us this day our daily bread.
BAKER: A “please” would be nice.
BAKER: A “please” would be nice.
When her daughter requested a duct-tape themed birthday party, Sophie adhered to her best parenting practices.
January 15, 2026 at 8:29 PM
When her daughter requested a duct-tape themed birthday party, Sophie adhered to her best parenting practices.
Reposted by Bart King
This dude is intense and correct
January 15, 2026 at 9:05 AM
This dude is intense and correct
Not sure how I've made it this far without knowing that a baby pterosaur is called a "flapling."
January 15, 2026 at 3:41 PM
Not sure how I've made it this far without knowing that a baby pterosaur is called a "flapling."
War exists so that Americans will learn geography … and economics. www.nytimes.com/2026/01/14/u...
Renaming Defense Department Could Cost Taxpayers $125 Million
www.nytimes.com
January 15, 2026 at 1:55 PM
War exists so that Americans will learn geography … and economics. www.nytimes.com/2026/01/14/u...
“Mom, i ate my drumstick, piece of broccoli, and tortilla, but i’m still hungry.”
“Oh baby, fill up on your one other thing.”
“Oh baby, fill up on your one other thing.”
Brooke Rollins: "We've run over 1,000 simulations. It can cost around $3 a meal for a piece of chicken, a piece of broccoli, corn tortilla, and one other thing. So there is a way to do this that actually will save the average American consumer money."
January 15, 2026 at 1:49 AM
“Mom, i ate my drumstick, piece of broccoli, and tortilla, but i’m still hungry.”
“Oh baby, fill up on your one other thing.”
“Oh baby, fill up on your one other thing.”
Octavia E. Butler’s “Parable of the Sower” has a funny passage about a very exclusive Pacific Northwest.
January 15, 2026 at 12:41 AM
Octavia E. Butler’s “Parable of the Sower” has a funny passage about a very exclusive Pacific Northwest.
Judson Memorial Baptist Church (Minneapolis):
January 14, 2026 at 8:16 PM
Judson Memorial Baptist Church (Minneapolis):
DRIVER: Howdy, partner! Guess how many gallons I want?
ATTENDANT (wearily): Ten.
ATTENDANT (wearily): Ten.
January 14, 2026 at 4:03 PM
DRIVER: Howdy, partner! Guess how many gallons I want?
ATTENDANT (wearily): Ten.
ATTENDANT (wearily): Ten.
<chortles in response, knocking over sippy-cup of apple juice>
January 14, 2026 at 2:39 PM
<chortles in response, knocking over sippy-cup of apple juice>
This sounds obvious, but if you'd like to directly message the current administration, this is the White House's "Contact Us" site.
www.whitehouse.gov/contact/
www.whitehouse.gov/contact/
Contact Us
Share your thoughts with President Donald J. Trump and Vice President JD Vance.
www.whitehouse.gov
January 14, 2026 at 2:38 PM
This sounds obvious, but if you'd like to directly message the current administration, this is the White House's "Contact Us" site.
www.whitehouse.gov/contact/
www.whitehouse.gov/contact/
I know everything is terrible, but here are six proposed new emojis, and the prospect of being able to use a meteor, pickle, or monarch butterfly may lift your spirits.
January 14, 2026 at 1:35 PM
I know everything is terrible, but here are six proposed new emojis, and the prospect of being able to use a meteor, pickle, or monarch butterfly may lift your spirits.
Norman Rockwell‘s “Four Freedoms” (1943) are prominently posted in Silverton Oregon. And for the past year, it’s been hard not to pass “Freedom from Fear” without wincing.
January 13, 2026 at 9:48 PM
Norman Rockwell‘s “Four Freedoms” (1943) are prominently posted in Silverton Oregon. And for the past year, it’s been hard not to pass “Freedom from Fear” without wincing.
AI's message: "This looks like a lot of words. Save time by disconnecting your cerebellum."
January 13, 2026 at 7:58 PM
AI's message: "This looks like a lot of words. Save time by disconnecting your cerebellum."
Just a reminder that we'll never be as cool as Robert DeNiro was in "Heat."
January 13, 2026 at 3:40 PM
Just a reminder that we'll never be as cool as Robert DeNiro was in "Heat."
This article’s links to US war and US Navy manuals are of interest. www.nytimes.com/2026/01/12/u...
U.S. Attacked Boat With Aircraft That Looked Like a Civilian Plane
www.nytimes.com
January 13, 2026 at 1:36 PM
This article’s links to US war and US Navy manuals are of interest. www.nytimes.com/2026/01/12/u...
Among its many,
*many* other crimes, this White House administration is legally and criminally perfidious.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfidy
*many* other crimes, this White House administration is legally and criminally perfidious.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfidy
Perfidy - Wikipedia
en.wikipedia.org
January 13, 2026 at 1:36 PM
Among its many,
*many* other crimes, this White House administration is legally and criminally perfidious.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfidy
*many* other crimes, this White House administration is legally and criminally perfidious.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfidy
Rats, the algorithm’s figured me out.
January 13, 2026 at 12:53 AM
Rats, the algorithm’s figured me out.
On chilly wintry mornings, I get cozy in my
January 12, 2026 at 4:43 PM
On chilly wintry mornings, I get cozy in my
Love to see it. www.salemreporter.com/2026/01/10/s...
Salem protest on Saturday draws 1,000 over ICE killing - Salem Reporter
A crowd approaching 1,000 people gathered Saturday in Salem at the north end of the Oregon State Capitol grounds, near the intersection of Northeast Center Street and Summer Street. Protesters in Sale...
www.salemreporter.com
January 12, 2026 at 3:06 PM
Love to see it. www.salemreporter.com/2026/01/10/s...
My niece has the Gaul to claim that her French is better than mine.
January 12, 2026 at 1:53 AM
My niece has the Gaul to claim that her French is better than mine.
Oh wild, “Gigli” is not only the name of the best movie ever, it’s also a pasta!
January 12, 2026 at 12:17 AM
Oh wild, “Gigli” is not only the name of the best movie ever, it’s also a pasta!
Trump officials frowning in incomprehension by this quote from Delcy Rodríguez:
“Joe *Manchin*?”
“Joe *Manchin*?”
January 11, 2026 at 8:17 PM
Trump officials frowning in incomprehension by this quote from Delcy Rodríguez:
“Joe *Manchin*?”
“Joe *Manchin*?”
WIFE: Are you getting up?
ME: “Tonic immobility” is a state of temporary paralysis in response to trauma. It is a common evolutionary response used by animals who play dead when attacked.
ME: “Tonic immobility” is a state of temporary paralysis in response to trauma. It is a common evolutionary response used by animals who play dead when attacked.
January 11, 2026 at 3:00 PM
WIFE: Are you getting up?
ME: “Tonic immobility” is a state of temporary paralysis in response to trauma. It is a common evolutionary response used by animals who play dead when attacked.
ME: “Tonic immobility” is a state of temporary paralysis in response to trauma. It is a common evolutionary response used by animals who play dead when attacked.
2.) ICE agents are not in danger. The leading cause of death for ICE agents is Covid. www.motherjones.com/politics/202...
How dangerous is it really to work for ICE?
According to ICE’s own data, none of its officers have been killed by an immigrant in the agency’s history.
www.motherjones.com
January 11, 2026 at 1:32 PM
2.) ICE agents are not in danger. The leading cause of death for ICE agents is Covid. www.motherjones.com/politics/202...