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Dan Howdle

@danhowdle.bsky.social

41K followers 6.9K following 2.4K posts

'Comedian'. Part-time iRacer. Art appreciator. Pro-LGBT, pro-Ukraine, pro-EU. Cis gentleman. He/him. Location: Babé, Belvaria.

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · Apr 14

and people always told me
be careful of what you do
don't go around breakin' young girls' hearts (hee-hee)
and mother always told me
be careful of who you love
and be careful of what you do
cause the lie becomes the truth
hey-ey!

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 13m

build more homes and they simply buy more. you underestimate both how much money they have (build 100,000 home tomorrow and their are single individuals wealthy enough to buy all of them), and that it's very much in their interests to maintain scarcity. the only thing that can stop them is the law.

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 17m

there's enough houses, elizabeth. the problem is wealth, where the multitude have none and a tiny minority have it all and use housing as an asset. building more homes will never, ever fix that.

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 12h

approximately two people get this joke. great success!

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 12h

are you aware that i'm a just character in a comic strip?

yeah, i see what you're saying

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 12h

yeah, paracetamol tastes bad

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 13h

careful folks, causes of autism now include vaccines, paracetamol, and lopping off the tip of your wang

Acyn @acyn.bsky.social · 14h

RFK JR: There are many other confirmations -- there are two studies that show children who are circumcised early have double the rate of autism. It’s highly likely because they are given Tylenol

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 13h

what does he know? nothing. but he's rich and connected. you don't need to actually know anything if you're rich and connected. you could replace your brain with a satsuma and you'd still get to be ceo of megacorp.

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 15h

there's this movie trope where the bad guy's tryna summon some sorta world-ending entity if only they can attain the mcguffin of summoning. and it makes me think geez i know you're bad, but when it arrives, you die too. i have the same feeling right now for those cheering on the arrival of fascism

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 16h

i'll be watching you

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 17h

i’m running as the 'breathtaking party' candidate in the upcoming local election. my policy platform is simple: more keanu reeves, less kristen stewart, rob schneider, and james woods. together we’ll build a more excellent, more keanu-shaped britain.

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 23h

in 2018, india's supreme court sought to curtail and limit the implementation of 'Aadhar' – india's digital id system, describing it as a 'tool of oppression'

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 23h

i have no idea what the means, but you do you 😉

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 23h

stick 'buff donald trump' into google image search. it's worth it, believe me.

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 23h

india knows what's up

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

because ice see themselves as heroes akin to those serving in the us military, you could destroy them with five simple words: fuck you for your service

if everyone, everywhere shouted that at them on sight, this thing would be over imo

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

i think what annoys me about how it's being reported is, as has been the case all through this, they're not factoring what this israeli administration has been openly saying about their genocidal goals.

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

i'm honestly stunned the media as a whole seems to think the bombing and killing will stop once the hostages are returned. as if this israeli administration will suddenly abandon its genocidal land grab. if it does stop the bombing, i give it less than a month before it finds an excuse to resume.

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

badenoch conference speech live now. expect quixotic batshittery of every stripe.

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Reposted by Dan Howdle

craftyprimrose.bsky.social @craftyprimrose.bsky.social · 1d

When the Tories closed down manufacturing industry in the 70s and 80s it was because Britain (or should that be Britian?) was going to be a knowledge economy. Now they're closing down knowledge. They want us to be a subsistence serf economy don't they? #TheGoodOldDays

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

current tory policy platform: reducing students by 100,000, banning wednesdays, halving gravity, capping birthdays at three per lifetime, introducing a national bedtime, limiting colours to two, privatising rain and banning foreign clouds

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

good take

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

wednesdays to be replaced by a day of national flag-licking

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 1d

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 2d

1. press gently into the cavities either side of your nose. if soft, jelly-like spheres are present, you're good to go
2. go outside and listen for moths and owls. if present, you're on time. if not, wait
3. point the socket-jellies in the opposite direction to your shoes

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Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 2d

they switched again for old time's sake

Dan Howdle @danhowdle.bsky.social · 2d

if a racist is racist in a forest and there's no one around to hear it...

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