Author | Lightnews

Lynn Burton

@disasterballet.bsky.social

740 followers 220 following 1.6K posts

Newfoundlander, neurodivergent, nerves rubbed right raw. Used to be a hot mess but pleased to announce I am no longer hot.

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · Jun 17

Trying to keep track of current events feels like picking up confetti piece by piece as someone sets off another confetti cannon behind you every five minutes

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 2h

I take damage to my health bar every time the words "I agree with Jason Kenney" cross my lips

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 4h

I am gonna wake my kids up if this keeps up

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 4h

POSTSEASON BASEBALL IS THE FUCKING BEST LET'S GOOOOOO

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 4h

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 4h

SO much purring

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 6h

HIMS LITTLE FACE!

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 7h

She literally lets my husband hold her like an infant and sing little songs with her name in them while she purrs the whole time 😭

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 7h

She's lived here a couple of years, but I'll never get tired of seeing her enjoying a life of luxury considering the sad little creature she was when we met her

A scraggly-looking black cat with sad yellow eyes accepts a chin scratch

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 7h

Oh, she's lived here and made herself quite comfy for a while now, but I'm still always honoured when she chooses to snuggle. It's even better when it's terrible weather outside and I know she never has to be out in that again.

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 7h

@evarose03.bsky.social literally look at her tho

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 7h

Urgent breaking news: former street cat curls up on lap to listen to the rain outside

A close up of a glossy black cat with green eyes curled up on a lap blanket

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 10h

🎶Mr. Hat Man
Bring me a dream
Ten million spiders and a blood-curdling scream🎶

Kari Dru @karidru.bsky.social · 11h

I had a fun thought today.

You know how a LOT of people have seen The Hat Man? And he's ominous but doesn't do anything?

If he kills people sometimes, how would we know?

MY BRAIN, EVERYONE!

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 15h

Okay but if you're following me you're still going to get the same jokes I make here only personally delivered ✨️

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 1d

I will NEVER give up my Oxford comma or em dash, it's not my fault that a bunch of the most incurious people who ever lived can't even write a fucking grocery list without the aid of the SlopBot

ana street rat @uldahstreetrat.bsky.social · 1d

"Oxford commas are a sign you write with ai" I will find such a unique way to rip out your spine that they'll make a movie about it

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 1d

I've been dealing with her crash outs once a month for 32 years minus a few pregnancy breaks, let me tell you that she did not come here to make friends

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 1d

"uterus is unremarkable" okay well you don't know her like I do, that bitch is crazy

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 2d

At only three sentences, this is my favourite short story I've read this year.

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 2d

Like I have made some unfortunate mistakes in my youth involving Fireball, low-rise jeans, DIY piercings, and the odd love triangle, but I managed to avoid a Nazi phase

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 2d

"So he had a white supremacist edgelord phase, who doesn't" is certainly a choice of argument that tells me some Stuff About You

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 3d

Every word of this headline is like the worst game of Mad Libs

J. Offir, PhD @joffirphd.bsky.social · 3d

This is the essence of psychological escalation of commitment.

Ivermectin does squat for covid. So now Joe Rogen & Mel Gibson suggest it should be used to treat cancer, & of course, Florida says "Us, first!"

🔹️"Ivermectin has taken on symbolic power...

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www.washingtonpost.com/health/2025/...

How a Joe Rogan-Mel Gibson podcast inspired Florida’s cancer research focus

Following a Joe Rogan, Mel Gibson podcast, Florida wants to study whether ivermectin could work against cancer. There is not yet evidence it would.

www.washingtonpost.com

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 3d

Won't even WEAR a jacket now, damn

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 3d

This tiny creature is now five foot two, in Grade 6, and already planning to apply to art school so excuse me while I play Slipping Through My Fingers and cry

A chubby baby with big blue eyes and a gummy smile sits in a stroller wearing a dalmatian jacket with ears on the hood

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 3d

The fact that I can't even begin to narrow down who this is referring to

Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 3d

There IS crying in baseball and we SUPPORT THAT

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Lynn Burton @disasterballet.bsky.social · 3d

Me: I'm not super into sports, really

Also me: PROTECT THIS MAN AT ALL COSTS

evy kwong @evystadium.bsky.social · 4d

PLEASE

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