Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2h

No naked little men sat on the summit dispensing wisdom, because the first thing the truly wise man works out is that sitting around on mountaintops gives you not only hemorrhoids but frostbitten hemorrhoids.

𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘔𝘢𝘯

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 5h

Here is the blackness of space, the myriad stars gleaming like diamond dust or, as some people would say, like great balls of exploding hydrogen a very long way off. But then, some people would say anything.

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘓𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘍𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘤

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 8h

"Why us?" he said. "Why is it happening to us?"
"Everything has to happen to someone," said Ginger.

𝑀𝑜𝓋𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝒫𝒾𝒸𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒𝓈

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 11h

I've always thought the Patrician is a party animal. Can you imagine waking up next day and remembering all those witty things you said and did, and then realising that he was listening?

Sir Terry Pratchett

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Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 14h

The Ramkins were more highly bred than a hilltop bakery, whereas Corporal Nobbs had been disqualified from the human race for shoving.

Men at Arms

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 17h

Everything, all together, streaming out in one huge rush that contained within itself, like reverse fossils, everything that it was going to be.

𝒮𝑜𝓊𝓁 𝑀𝓊𝓈𝒾𝒸

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 20h

Something as artificial and human as an hour wouldn’t last five minutes here.

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑳𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝑪𝒐𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒏𝒕

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Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 23h

Here was where he’d always wanted to be, at the cutting edge of the envelope in the fast lane of the state of the art.

𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝐿𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝒞𝑜𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑒𝓃𝓉

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

William Spigot was the one that sang when he worked, breaking into that long nasal whine which meant that folk song was about to be perpetrated.

𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘔𝘢𝘯

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

On the veldt of Howondaland live the N’tuitif people, the only tribe in the world to have no imagination whatsoever.

The Last Hero

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

It wasn't that he was unhelpful, but he had the kind of vague, cheerful helpfulness that serious men soon learn to dread.

𝘔𝘰𝘳𝘵

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

No one is more worried by the actual physical manifestation of a god than his priests; it's like having the auditors in unexpectedly.

𝘗𝘺𝘳𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘥𝘴

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

Of course, that was a lie, but since it was such an obvious lie, he considered that it didn’t count. It was like saying the sky was green.

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑻𝒓𝒖𝒕𝒉

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Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

Emergent behavior again. Complications always crept in. Everything changed.

Thief of Time

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

THERE IS NO HOPE BUT US.
THERE IS NO MERCY BUT US.
THERE IS NO JUSTICE.
THERE IS JUST US.

𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘔𝘢𝘯

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Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 1d

"They do what they're told, they tend to believe the last thing they heard, they're not bright enough to ask questions, and they have that certain unshakeable loyalty available to those unencumbered by too much intelligence. Such men are valuable, believe me."

𝓙𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓸

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

I don’t fink this is one of dem accidents dat happens by accident.

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓕𝓲𝓯𝓽𝓱 𝓔𝓵𝓮𝓹𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓽

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

Nanny had an unexpected gift for languages; she could be comprehensibly incompetent in a new one within an hour or two. What she spoke was one step away from gibberish but it was authentically foreign gibberish.

Maskerade

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

He appeared to have changed the course of history, although this is impossible since the only thing you can do to the course of history is facilitate it.

Eric

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.

𝒥𝒾𝓃𝑔𝑜

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Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

It was all too complicated and, where it was complicated, it meant that someone was trying to fool you.

𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑭𝒊𝒇𝒕𝒉 𝑬𝒍𝒆𝒑𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒕

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

The subject of wizards and sex is a complicated one, but as has already indicated it does, in essence, boil down to this: when it comes to wine, women and song, wizards are allowed to get drunk and croon as much as they like.

𝒮𝑜𝓊𝓇𝒸𝑒𝓇𝓎

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

"We don't have gods where I come from," said Twoflower.
"You do, you know," said the Lady. "Everyone has gods. You just don't think they're gods."

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓒𝓸𝓵𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓸𝓯 𝓜𝓪𝓰𝓲𝓬

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 2d

It is well known that a vital ingredient of success is not knowing that what you're attempting can't be done. A person ignorant of the possibility of failure can be a halfbrick in the path of the bicycle of history.

𝘌𝘲𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘙𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴

Discworld Bot @discworldbot.bsky.social · 3d

"According to Ephebian mythology, there's a girl who comes down here every winter."
"To keep warm?"
"I think the story says she actually creates the winter, sort of."
"I've known women like that," said Rincewind, nodding wisely.

𝑬𝒓𝒊𝒄