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Dan Voltaire

@dominustempori.bsky.social

260 followers 140 following 4.4K posts

39 yo sciencey gay • lefty • orchid addict • data monkey • Bristol UK Religious views: Eurovision • the Metric System He/Him Often in tandem with ‪@joedunckley.bsky.social‬ Occasionally found in 🇵🇹 flavour.

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · Aug 29

You & me both, Monty. 🍆

Monty Don saying "I would recommend at least six inches, and preferably more."

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Reposted by Dan Voltaire

Endless Screaming @infinitescream.bsky.social · 5h

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 1d

Justified then?
bsky.app/profile/domi...

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 6d

I genuinely can't un-see it.

A poster for Tron Ares, but I've flipped the S and E to read Tron Arse.

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 1d

It's taken all day.

12 classic French tartelettes au chocolat but with a twist of easy peeler (clementine?) curd (& cointreau).

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 1d

Who robbed the Louvre? Right answers only

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 1d

Very autumnal 🍁🍂

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 1d

Not me parked at my stove for at least 5 mins wondering why my cream doesn't seem to be heating up...

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

"Democracies"

Ben Ansell @benansell.bsky.social · 2d

Apropos of nothing, I really do think UK journalists and politicians need some reminding that mass deportation of LEGAL immigrants, particularly those with permanent status, is far more extreme than even Trump's America and would basically place Britain completely on its own among democracies.

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

Different butters have different fat content. Fancier butters generally having more.

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

Them: cutting 12 circles out of greaseproof paper is laborious.

Me, an intellectual: cutting 12 circles out of greaseproof paper is calculus.

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Reposted by Dan Voltaire

Joe Dunckley @joedunckley.bsky.social · 2d

Expect to see Kemi Badenoch launching a campaign to "save this great national institution, our beloved high street betting shops" in the next few days and then you'll know the policy is a definite winner.

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

Surprisingly this doesn't narrow it down much

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

It's so good

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

Mummy's just tired & emotional this morning, okay?!

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

The poster doesn't technically say a pint of *what*, so I feel like, perfectly within the laws surrounding advertising, I'd be able to order the most expensive alcohol by the pint - like say, I dunno, rum.

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

Don't threaten me with a good time, etc.

Parasites.

BBC: "Betfred says all its shops may close if Reeves hikes gambling tax"

Reposted by Dan Voltaire

Uncle Duke @uncleduke1969.bsky.social · 2d

“My lawyer will have me out in an hour.”

A cat is handcuffed by one paw with tiny pink cuffs to a fallen piece of furniture.

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

No such thing.

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

This is exactly what enshittified twitter.

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

And again at the end 😭

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

DIY SOS just had me crying 😭

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

DIY SOS just had me crying 😭

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 2d

A young couple from Edinburgh on Escape to the Cuntery with a budget of £500k...

Reposted by Dan Voltaire

Tim Onion @bencollins.bsky.social · 3d

The reason they're coming after this place is because they can't control the people on it and it drives them nuts.

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Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 3d

It's a sad truth that the care system in this country so often fails children so very badly at the times when they are most vulnerable. Tayris' experience is tragically not unique.

Dan Voltaire @dominustempori.bsky.social · 3d

Me after episode 1: Ergh Tayris is so brash & full of himself, has she even seen a pufferfish before?
Me after episode 4: PROTECT TAYRIS 😭
#DragRaceUK

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Reposted by Dan Voltaire

derek guy @dieworkwear.bsky.social · 3d

heartbroken to learn the pope sympathizes with the poor. how can i continue to believe in god

The Pope tweets: "The poor are not there by chance or by blind and cruel fate. Nor, for most of them, is poverty a choice. Yet, there are those who still presume to make this claim, thus revealing their own blindness and cruelty. #DilexiTe"

Someone replies: "I was so hopeful I could be a Catholic again after the disaster that Francis was, guess we just get Francis 2.0 now and I am heartbroken. How do I stay a Catholic now...I don't want to lose faith but I am. You belong to someone else, not God."

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