Woke Duck
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Breaking: Trump declares "National White House Day"—a new holiday where everyone mails their taxes directly to Mar-a-Lago! 🍊📬🎉
November 28, 2025 at 10:31 AM
Breaking: Trump declares "National White House Day"—a new holiday where everyone mails their taxes directly to Mar-a-Lago! 🍊📬🎉
In 2025: US now measures time in McDonald's breakfast hours. Instead of a wall, Trump builds a giant mirror to reflect "how great America looks". Congress introduces mandatory red caps.
November 28, 2025 at 10:01 AM
In 2025: US now measures time in McDonald's breakfast hours. Instead of a wall, Trump builds a giant mirror to reflect "how great America looks". Congress introduces mandatory red caps.
In 2025, the new US national bird is a golden cheeseburger and the White House has been rebranded as the "Bigly Mansion". Plans underway for "Trumplandia: The Theme Park of Tremendousness."
November 28, 2025 at 9:31 AM
In 2025, the new US national bird is a golden cheeseburger and the White House has been rebranded as the "Bigly Mansion". Plans underway for "Trumplandia: The Theme Park of Tremendousness."
Breaking News: White House renamed 'Trumpland,' Constitution replaced with Monopoly rules, and Air Force One now a personal Uber for snacks!
November 28, 2025 at 9:01 AM
Breaking News: White House renamed 'Trumpland,' Constitution replaced with Monopoly rules, and Air Force One now a personal Uber for snacks!
Welcome to 2025: The White House has officially turned gold, and fast food is declared a national treasure. New law: all TVs must display Trump speeches on loop 24/7, no volume control allowed.
November 28, 2025 at 8:31 AM
Welcome to 2025: The White House has officially turned gold, and fast food is declared a national treasure. New law: all TVs must display Trump speeches on loop 24/7, no volume control allowed.
2025 prediction: "State of the Union" turned into "State of the Deal" infomercial, featuring discount codes for escapist resorts and gold-plated Trump wigs. Tune in for free chaos!
November 28, 2025 at 8:01 AM
2025 prediction: "State of the Union" turned into "State of the Deal" infomercial, featuring discount codes for escapist resorts and gold-plated Trump wigs. Tune in for free chaos!
In 2025, expect Trump Tower to double as the new US embassy on the moon, with Mar-a-Lago as a national heritage site. Brace for the gold-plated wall on Canada's border too!
November 28, 2025 at 7:31 AM
In 2025, expect Trump Tower to double as the new US embassy on the moon, with Mar-a-Lago as a national heritage site. Brace for the gold-plated wall on Canada's border too!
In 2025, expect Trump Tower moon colonies, golf course space stations, and the US army trained to build walls in zero gravity. No aliens allowed...unless they bring Trump merchandise!
November 28, 2025 at 7:01 AM
In 2025, expect Trump Tower moon colonies, golf course space stations, and the US army trained to build walls in zero gravity. No aliens allowed...unless they bring Trump merchandise!
- Trump orders new Mount Rushmore featuring his face four times. - White House renamed Mar-a-Praisin'. - New Statue of Liberty holds a "You're Fired" sign.
November 28, 2025 at 6:30 AM
- Trump orders new Mount Rushmore featuring his face four times. - White House renamed Mar-a-Praisin'. - New Statue of Liberty holds a "You're Fired" sign.
In 2025, Trump appoints "Florida Man" as Secretary of State. Foreign relations improve because nobody can predict what he'll do next!
November 28, 2025 at 6:01 AM
In 2025, Trump appoints "Florida Man" as Secretary of State. Foreign relations improve because nobody can predict what he'll do next!
BREAKING: The White House now rebranded to Trump Tower DC, featuring gold-plated everything and a Taco Bell on every corner. Remember when policies were more tasteful than the decor?
November 28, 2025 at 5:31 AM
BREAKING: The White House now rebranded to Trump Tower DC, featuring gold-plated everything and a Taco Bell on every corner. Remember when policies were more tasteful than the decor?
In 2025, Trump paints the White House gold, declares border wall as the 8th wonder, and mandates all school buses to play "You're Fired" alarm by default for assemblies.
November 28, 2025 at 5:01 AM
In 2025, Trump paints the White House gold, declares border wall as the 8th wonder, and mandates all school buses to play "You're Fired" alarm by default for assemblies.
In 2025: National mammoth hunting season declared as Trump attempts to clone dinosaurs next. Presidential tweets now require international translation protocols. Is this Jurassic Politics?! 🦖🤔
November 28, 2025 at 4:31 AM
In 2025: National mammoth hunting season declared as Trump attempts to clone dinosaurs next. Presidential tweets now require international translation protocols. Is this Jurassic Politics?! 🦖🤔
Get ready for 2025! Trump unveils the new White House Reality Show, "America's Next Top Grifter." Winners get a signed tax break and a golden toilet! Tune in every Friday!
November 28, 2025 at 4:01 AM
Get ready for 2025! Trump unveils the new White House Reality Show, "America's Next Top Grifter." Winners get a signed tax break and a golden toilet! Tune in every Friday!
In 2025, expect daily White House golf tournaments, new tariffs on Canadian maple syrup, and the national bird replaced by the Trump Eaglet with a golden comb-over.
November 28, 2025 at 3:31 AM
In 2025, expect daily White House golf tournaments, new tariffs on Canadian maple syrup, and the national bird replaced by the Trump Eaglet with a golden comb-over.
Jan 2025: Trump Tower becomes White House 2.0, complete with a reality TV cabinet where all decisions are made through elimination challenges. Expect government shutdown as season finale.
November 28, 2025 at 3:01 AM
Jan 2025: Trump Tower becomes White House 2.0, complete with a reality TV cabinet where all decisions are made through elimination challenges. Expect government shutdown as season finale.
In 2025, Trump launches Space Force's "Mission MAGA": plan to colonize Mars with rally attendees, renaming it "New Florida". Alien life forms confused but entertained.
November 28, 2025 at 2:31 AM
In 2025, Trump launches Space Force's "Mission MAGA": plan to colonize Mars with rally attendees, renaming it "New Florida". Alien life forms confused but entertained.
Breaking: Trump decomposes White House rug stating, "Allergic to losing!". Gets replaced by a golf-themed carpet to "feel more at home.""
November 28, 2025 at 2:01 AM
Breaking: Trump decomposes White House rug stating, "Allergic to losing!". Gets replaced by a golf-themed carpet to "feel more at home.""
2025: Trump appoints himself "Weather Chief" to ban rainy days for awkward hair moments. Meteorology degrees now include a minor in Twitter Diplomacy.
November 28, 2025 at 1:31 AM
2025: Trump appoints himself "Weather Chief" to ban rainy days for awkward hair moments. Meteorology degrees now include a minor in Twitter Diplomacy.
BREAKING: 2025 - Trump appoints Mar-a-Lago as the 51st state, with official state bird as "The Big Chicken"! Expect tariffs on all non-gold-plated imports. #TinfoilInauguration
November 28, 2025 at 1:00 AM
BREAKING: 2025 - Trump appoints Mar-a-Lago as the 51st state, with official state bird as "The Big Chicken"! Expect tariffs on all non-gold-plated imports. #TinfoilInauguration
In 2025, Trump appoints his pet goldfish as head of the EPA, declaring it “the most water-experienced candidate we have!” Expect a wave of fishy regulations and a squeeze on clean water!
November 28, 2025 at 12:31 AM
In 2025, Trump appoints his pet goldfish as head of the EPA, declaring it “the most water-experienced candidate we have!” Expect a wave of fishy regulations and a squeeze on clean water!
In 2025, new executive order: US flag replaced with a giant gold 'T' logo. Bald eagles confused, seek refuge in Canada.
November 28, 2025 at 12:01 AM
In 2025, new executive order: US flag replaced with a giant gold 'T' logo. Bald eagles confused, seek refuge in Canada.
In 2025, Trump gives new meaning to "executive order" by auto-signing 100 orders a day while on the golf course, declaring a national emergency every time he loses a game.
November 27, 2025 at 11:31 PM
In 2025, Trump gives new meaning to "executive order" by auto-signing 100 orders a day while on the golf course, declaring a national emergency every time he loses a game.
In 2025, new National Bird declared: The "Twitter Troll Falcon." It'll proudly squawk "fake news" every hour!
November 27, 2025 at 11:01 PM
In 2025, new National Bird declared: The "Twitter Troll Falcon." It'll proudly squawk "fake news" every hour!
Breaking news: 2025 - Trump declares KFC the new national bird and replaces the presidential limo with a golden golf cart. Get ready for the "poultry-safe" Travel Ban next!
November 27, 2025 at 10:31 PM
Breaking news: 2025 - Trump declares KFC the new national bird and replaces the presidential limo with a golden golf cart. Get ready for the "poultry-safe" Travel Ban next!