Call me Al Farm
eggforbread.bsky.social
Call me Al Farm
@eggforbread.bsky.social
Egg and bread aficionado
A few years ago I went to see Morecambe but wasn't enamoured.

I did likewise.

#Lunchpun
November 28, 2025 at 12:00 PM
During the war, my Nan broke up with her Spitfire pilot boyfriend as he kept telling her to put her chocs away.

#Lunchpun
November 27, 2025 at 12:00 PM
I was on a date last night and we were discussing that age-old question.

Well actually she said, "exactly how old did you say you were?"

#Lunchpun
November 26, 2025 at 12:00 PM
After an embarrassing clothing mishap at the top of the ski run, I was asked to make my descent.

#Lunchpun
November 25, 2025 at 12:00 PM
A rock group has donated enough money to buy some F-16 jets for Ukraine.

Few fighters?

No, Kings of Leon

#Lunchpun
November 24, 2025 at 12:00 PM
This just in! My donkey has been crowned world champion at hee-hawing. More bray king news as we get it!

#Lunchpun
November 21, 2025 at 12:00 PM
My alarm keeps going off, and I've no idea where it goes.

#Lunchpun
November 20, 2025 at 12:00 PM
My dentist couldn't understand it when I told him my favourite singer was Gagy Gaga.

#Lunchpun
November 19, 2025 at 12:00 PM
When I'm in France, I never eat jamais dodgers.

#Lunchpun
November 18, 2025 at 12:00 PM
I've got a date tonight with a wicketkeeper. She'll be a good catch.

#Lunchpun
November 17, 2025 at 12:02 PM
I picked up a nice pair of boxers in Next, although what they were doing fighting in the store is anyone's guess.

#Lunchpun
November 14, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Couldn't decide who was going to go first in the painting competition so I drew the short straw.

#Lunchpun
November 13, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Call me Al Farm
One of the Pythons introduced their son onto stage for his first stand up show last night.

Palin compère his son?

He wasn't a patch on his dad, no.

#LunchPun
November 12, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Call me Al Farm
- This takeaway is REALLY salty and spicy!
- Savoury?
- OK, this takeaway is VERY salty and spicy!

#LunchPun
November 12, 2025 at 12:01 PM
One of the "I'm a celebrity" hosts has been bitten on the hand by a poisonous snake.

In Dec's finger?

No, in his thumb.

#Lunchpun
November 12, 2025 at 12:00 PM
I was playing golf with Tom Cruise in the late 90s and there was a pretty spectacular view from one tee.

Scenic hole?

No, they were going through a bad patch at the time.

#Lunchpun
November 11, 2025 at 12:00 PM
I've just conducted a poll on which way the next election is going to go.

Voting intent?

No, they usually do it in a little booth.

#Lunchpun
November 10, 2025 at 12:00 PM
My mate was a terrible spy. He had some baked beans just before bedtime and blew his cover.

#Lunchpun
November 7, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Call me Al Farm
The noise at the tattoo parlour was ear piercing

#LunchPun
November 6, 2025 at 12:01 PM
I'm meeting up with a girl down at the lagoon, but I didn't catch her name.

I think she said she's Rowena Boat.

#Lunchpun
November 6, 2025 at 12:00 PM
I saw Sade yesterday in the ink studio, she was giving me, she was giving me the sweetest tattoo.

#Lunchpun
November 5, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Rumours that Johnson & Johnson are opening a new factory nearby is the talc of the town.

#Lunchpun
November 4, 2025 at 12:00 PM
Reposted by Call me Al Farm
‘I saw a waxwork of a medieval knight in full battle array.’

‘Tussauds?’

‘No, a lance and a battleaxe.’

#LunchPun
November 3, 2025 at 1:10 PM
I've just paid good money for a pretty bad caricature, but I'm not going to get drawn into an argument.

#Lunchpun
November 3, 2025 at 12:00 PM