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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran
@ejanearan.bsky.social
320 followers 160 following 300 posts
Proud mom. 💙 LGBTQAI+ ally. Not liberal (in US sense), but sure as heckfire not a modern GOPer. Fond of rock tumbling, hatching praying mantids, feeding hummingbirds, rescuing Monarch butterflies, and home repair.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 5d
Don't ask questions that you don't want the answers to.

#winning #argument #searchengine #funny
Two search-engine parts are shown, along with time-stamps. At 8:43, a user types into Google search the following question: "How to beat girlfriend in an argument". At 8:48, the user asks, "How to apologize to girlfriend".
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 6d
Maybe candy corn hates you, too.

#Halloween #candycorn #funny
Maybe candy corn hates you, too.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 20d
Ew.

#fart #AI #neuralnetworks #funny
Subject line: I trained an AI on three months of continuous fart sounds. Here's what happened. Text: So I collected 2.5 million feet samples (approximately three months of non-stop farting) and trained a neural network on them. The results: * It can identify your diet with 87% accuracy from a single fart. * It learned that there are only 7 basic fart types (all others are combinations) * It started generating "fart symphonies" that actually slap. * It predicted the stock market with 52% accuracy (barely better than random, but still). Most disturbing discovery: When I asked it to generate "the perfect fart", it created a 3.7-second sound that made my dog cry and my roommate move out.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 22d
A text chain.

1st poster: If you wouldn't go to someone for advice, don't take their criticism either.

2nd poster: Wait-- whoa

3rd poster: [Original poster] woke up and chose logic today and [I don't know] how I feel about that
A text chain. 1st poster: If you wouldn't go to someone for advice, don't take their criticism either. 2nd poster: Wait-- whoa 3rd poster: [Original poster] woke up and chose logic today and [I don't know] how I feel about that
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 29d
Yeah, that tracks.

#funny #sentience #sentientbeings
A computer screen displays a question, followed by three radio-button answer options (so only one option can be chosen at a time), and a "Submit" button at the bottom. The question is, "Are you a sentient human being?" The first answer option is "Yes"; the second answer option is "No". The third option, which has been selected, is "Unfortunately".
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 29d
Ikr?

#funny #attorneys #attorneyatlaw
@allday says, "Thank god attorneys let us know they're attorneys 'at law' so we don't assume they're attorneys at garlic bread or something."
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 29d
Imma be the second one.

#funny #humor #enlightenment #findthehumor #unhinged
Once you're able to find humor in any situation, you've either reached enlightenment, or you're just a little unhinged.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · 29d
Yeah, I kinda get it, too.

#funny #happyasaclam #clams #ignoranceisbliss
Jonathan Edward Durham says, "Happy as a clam? A clam? You mean those tiny things with no brain that just chill on the bottom of the ocean all day in their own little private shells and have absolutely no concept of what's going on in the-- never mind, I get it now."
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Sep 10
This reminds me of Louise on "Bob's Burgers".

#kids #toys #splitting #Solomon #funny
"Henpecked Hal" recounts a conversation with his kids. Son: it's MY toy! Daughter: no, it's MINE! Me: you both lay claim to this toy? I shall chop it in two and give each of you half. Son: AWESOME! Daughter: YES! Me: no, that's not... Kids: CHOP IT! CHOP IT! CHOP IT!
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Sep 10
#puns #Sunroof #sunroofcar #dog #doglife #funny
Julius Roberts posts: "My sister was very excited to take this picture in traffic today." Shown is the back of the dark-colored Chevy ahead of the sister's car. A small white dog is sticking its head up through the car's roof, "smiling" back at the sister. The license plate reads "SUNWOOF".
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Sep 10
My cat says, "Same."
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Sep 10
Oops.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Sep 9
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 30
I've upended a mesh wastebasket and filled it with milkweed. So why, pray tell, are they all huddled in one spot?!?

Are they... are they maybe plotting something? Should I be worried?

#monarchbutterflies #caterpillars #milkweed #growing #rearing
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 25
Instant karma!

#instantkarma #rude #obnoxious #domainname #funny
Khalil Sehnaoui says: Coffee shop. People next to me are loud and rude. They just found the perfect name for a new business. I just bought the domain name.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 25
White text on a red background: "Trying to understand some people is like trying to pick up a turd by the clean end."
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 25
#EmailAddress #typing #tvremote #tvremotecontrol #losingit #funny
White text on a black background: When I finally snap, it will be after I tried to type my email address on the TV with the remote. Again.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 25
A four-panel comic. Panel 1: A blue circle is shown, labeled as "My interests". Panel 2: A yellow circle is added to the picture, to the right of the blue circle. The yellow circle is labeled "My friend's interests". Panel 3: Zooming in, we can see that there is a tiny green region where the two circles overlap slightly. Panel 4: Zooming in further, we can see that the overlap is labeled "Person we don't like".
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 25
#happyasaclam #funny
Jonathan Edward Durham asks, "Happy as a clam? A clam? You mean those tiny things with no brain that just chill on the bottom of the ocean all day in their own private shells and have absolutely no concept of what's going on in the-- Nevermind; I get it now."
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 24
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 24
#Monarchs #caterpillars #milkweed
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 17
I feel ya, little dude.

#frenchtoast #legos #working #schoollife
At the bottom of the graphic is a stack of French toast on a white plate. The text above the stack says: Nobody: My 6yr old talking to himself on the toilet: Every day I gotta get up for school, and then every day I'm gonna have to get up for work. When does it end? Did I ask for this? No. I don't remember that I asked for this. I asked for rest and Legos and French toast.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 13
So tempting....

#leafblower #glitter #tinkerbell #funny
Filled my neighbor's leaf blower with glitter. Now his yard looks like Tinker Bell hit a landmine.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 12
Same.

#dragons #problemsolved #funny
I feel like a lot of my problems would be solved if I had a dragon.
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ejanearan.bsky.social
E. Jane Aran @ejanearan.bsky.social · Jul 12
And I'm *always* eating oreos. 💩

#cleaningtips #cleaning #resistanceisfutile #oreos #funny
Cleaning your house with everyone home is like brushing your teeth while eating oreos.
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