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Guidomke

@guidomke.bsky.social

430 followers 460 following 4.8K posts

Random dude from Milwaukee. Frequent traveler to India. Member of American MENSA. Also I like to bake.

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · Nov 24

For any new people who want to get to know me, this is my skull.

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 9h

Happy #Diwali

a purple background with fireworks and a candle in the middle that says happy diwali

Alt: a purple background with fireworks and a candle in the middle that says happy diwali

media.tenor.com

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 9h

Hey @pamtoo.bsky.social I might be dipping my toe in the fruit cake arena this season. (Yup, extra fancy)

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 14h

If you have a signature automatically appended to your emails, that means you don't need to put in a closing and your name, Susan!

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 1d

Who robbed the Louvre?
(right answers only)

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 1d

If you're in a situation where a window opens after a door is closed, that's probably a poltergeist. Maybe some kind of possession. I dunno, just get out of the house: don't wait until the walls bleed.

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 1d

🩵

Reposted by Guidomke

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 1d

I have achieved a new level of maturity where I am quietly and relentlessly judging everyone else's reusable grocery bags.

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 4d

My Roomba just made the starting up noise in the other room for no reason and I'm pretty sure it's hinting that I do some cleaning.

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 7d

I just ordered a 3.5lb bag of Tootsie Pops.

a cartoon says let 's find out while a statue of liberty holds a flower

Alt: It's the 1970s commercial for Tootsie Pops where the boy hands Mr Owl a Tootsie Pop and the owl says "Let's find out" in the answer to the question, "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?"

media.tenor.com

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 7d

My basement is so cluttered and dirty that arson is starting to look like a viable solution.

Reposted by Guidomke

RiotGrlErin @riotgrlerin.bsky.social · 8d

the grim reaper driving a taxi full of meats and cheeses makes it a death cab for charcuterie.

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 9d

A made for TV murder mystery set in the 80s, "Murder Most Grody"

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 10d

I'm on my sixth COVID shot and still can't receive 5g. Is there a customer service number I can complain to?

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 10d

The guy who invented the whole chiropractic thing claimed he got the idea from a ghost.

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 10d

Tonight's old man plans are to get a Covid booster and then watch the Great British Bake Off.

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 11d

If they also find a link between Caesarean births and autism, I'm three for three.

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 11d

I think I started one there. Or attempted to. I'll have to dig around.

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Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 11d

Happy #leiferikson day!

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 12d

There's no business like teeth business...

Guidomke @guidomke.bsky.social · 12d

Well, as my grandmother always said: "Hey, you know what they say: see a broad to get dat booty yak 'em...leg 'er down a smack 'em yak 'em!