Author | Lightnews

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · 2h

Voters are quite possibly the dumbest creatures on Earth. Within two years of casting a vote they have completely forgotten about it and vote the opposite way. Lather, rinse, repeat.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · 1d

A 15-point win for VA gov. A 5-point win for VA AG in a race he was expected to lose. A 13-point win for NJ gov, in a race that was expected to be close. An outright majority in NYC in a three-way race. A 30-point win for Prop 50 in CA. #BlueWave #Election2025

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · 1d

In the face of an embarrassing election loss, the aspiring autocrat doubles down on the autocracy. Because if elections aren't going to go your way, then maybe there don't need to be elections at all. Watch the Pantone Menace in the coming days.

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Reposted by Jon Stafford

Qasim Rashid, Esq. @qasimrashid.com · Sep 20

Establishment Dems pushing Janet Mills—who would be 85 after her first term—to run for Maine Senate.🤦🏽‍♂️

We HAVE a stellar candidate in Graham Platner (40), who rejects AIPAC, condemns Israel’s genocide in Gaza, demands universal healthcare, & is people funded. Donate $5 here: actl.ink/grmpltnerbgi...

actl.ink

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Sep 15

LMAO @ Democrats saying they oppose Mamdani because he would be "deeply unpopular" as mayor. They oppose him because he will be deeply POPULAR as mayor and it scares the bejesus out of them.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Sep 15

I am deeply disappointed in John Roberts. They always call him an "institutionalist," but all he seems to care about is preserving "order" at the price of caving to authoritarians.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 29

"We're all going to die." -Senator Joni Ernst

True. But sometimes our careers die first.

Republican Sen. Joni Ernst won't seek re-election in Iowa in 2026

The two-term Republican had faced criticism from the right for wavering over Trump’s pick of Pete Hegseth to lead the Defense Department. She was first elected to the Senate in 2014.

www.nbcnews.com

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 28

The problem is that this SCOTUS will probably agree with MAGA-Lard-O.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 27

The Harmonic Multiverse is the idea that all possible universes exist like notes in a vast cosmic symphony. Close realities differ slightly, like instruments playing a note sharp or flat, while distant ones are whole new tunes. Reality is harmony: fractal superpositions structured like music.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 25

The "negotiation" was that Germany and Japan unconditionally surrendered. No terms were offered.

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 25

Sometimes I don't want to be perceived. Sometimes I want to be the center of attention. The fun part is that even I don't know how I'll feel at any given moment.

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 15

Alaska is the perfect place for a meeting with Putin because, like Ukraine, it used to be Russian territory but never will be again.

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 14

Why do they call it Mobile, Alabama when it hasn't moved in years?

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 13

Just to be clear: 47 doesn't hate war because he abhors violence and killing. He hates war for the same reason that he hates kids and animals: because they take attention away from him. He only wants chaos when HE orchestrates it.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 13

Current NYC mayoral polling:

Zohran Mamdani 44%
Andrew Cuomo 25%
Curtis Sliwa 12%
Eric Adams 7%

Hizzoner should probably start packing.

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 11

Can you only see your children on weekends but don't?

Did your mom cosign for your truck?

Are you not allowed to buy Sudafed?

Do you still talk about the time you almost met Kid Rock?

Do you not wash your butthole because it's "too gay?"

If so, ICE wants to hire you!

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 9

Ghislaine Maxwell will name names, who will coincidentally be mostly Dems or MAGA enemies. She’ll claim 47 is a righteous man who read the Bible in his spare time and tried to get Epstein to change his wicked ways. Then she will get a pardon for her "bravery."

Reposted by Jon Stafford

Artologica aka Michele Banks @artologica.net · Aug 7

BRO DO YOU EVEN LIFT? Squirrel of the Day for August 7, 2025 #sqrlpix

gray squirrel in hunched over bodybuilder pose

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 9

Dude that's nuts.

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 9

If you want to boycott Dean Cain shows I have good news for you: he hasn't been in any for years.

Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Aug 9

Thinking about how if I were Paul Atreides none of the crazy stuff would have gone down because no effing way would I have stuck my hand in that box.

Reposted by Jon Stafford

The Onion @theonion.com · Aug 2

Hulk Hogan’s Spasming Cadaver Body-Slams Mortician
theonion.com/hulk-ho...

Hulk Hogan’s Spasming Cadaver Body-Slams Mortician

CLEARWATER, FL—After undergoing a medical emergency and dying last week at the age of 71, Hulk Hogan’s spasming cadaver reportedly lifted a mortician high above its head Monday and body-slammed the professional. “At approximately 1:34 p.m., Hulk Hogan’s deceased corpse underwent spontaneous convulsions, at which point the cadaver bolted upright, ripped off its body bag, […]

theonion.com

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Jul 28

Fantastic Four: First Steps was good but should’ve been weirder. Best FF movie by far, but it felt like too much was cut. Cast is great. Reed & Sue dominated; Ben & Johnny deserved more. A solid B+, but played it too safe when it could’ve gone wild. Didn’t grab me like Superman did.

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Reposted by Jon Stafford

Al Yankovic @alyankovic.bsky.social · Jul 27

My last living musical hero is still my hero but unfortunately no longer living. RIP to the great, great Mr. Tom Lehrer.

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Jon Stafford @jonstafford.bsky.social · Jul 27

There are also some plain old idiots defending them too. Call them wannabe oligarchs I guess.