Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Mitskimask The Slump God

@mitskimask.bsky.social

7.7K followers 690 following 6.8K posts

Secretly 3 raccoons in a trench coat. Here for your trash.

Posts Media Videos Starter Packs

Pinned

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · Dec 19

Year 2049:
I arise from a floor vat of goo.
"Computer" my voice echoes across an empty room.
A Clippy hologram appears.
"Image creation, shot of vagina, superimpose Che Guevara face, alter pubic hair to match Che hair.
Title: Guerilla Grip Pussy"
I am the last human shit poster and this is my tale.

6 44

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 3h

So pirates know to keep away from ye booty? Yarrrr

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 3h

I'll never forgive the right for tanking the rare Pepé market. It's time the left took it back.

1 1

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 3h

They said
"Not today plantcel. Inorganic-chads ONLY"

1 1

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 5h

I think we as people need to stop caring about minor shit like this and the Howard Dean scream. The alternative is demons in office.

1 2

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 7h

Lmaoooooooo

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 7h

Don't catch a cold mija, bring a sweater.

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 7h

I loved the Monster I got from the GTA1 disc. It look like dinosaur.

1 1

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 7h

Imagine a public execution being streamed and they're like
"Hold on we gotta do the sponsor read before your last words also can you mention Blue Chew in there."

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 9h

When my company is in the green for some reason.

a man covering his face while watching a basketball game

ALT: a man covering his face while watching a basketball game

media.tenor.com

1 8

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 19h

I would pay more for them to not have an Opinion section.

1 2

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 20h

1 15 59

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 20h

a close up of a man wearing a yellow shirt and black collar

ALT: a close up of a man wearing a yellow shirt and black collar

media.tenor.com

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 20h

Reverse howdy-girl

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 20h

I can finally see your posts without clicking on them.

1 1

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 20h

I condemn the Captain Kirk shooting.

1 1

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 20h

I don't know why news outlets have an opinion page. I can see bad opinions online anytime for free. I am not buying a news subscription to see more.

1 1 11

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 23h

Aight back to abnormal posting

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 1d

Barn owls seeing a barn for the first time

1 24

Reposted by Mitskimask The Slump God

josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99.bsky.social · 2d

The Butlerian Jihad must have sucked for guys who just bought a new computer

21 230 1.8K

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 1d

When someone asks me who the lovely flowers I am carrying are for:

1 1 13

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 1d

I'm always saying this.

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 1d

I would like to call a surprise witness to the stand. You your honor!

*Judge takes the stand*

Just wanted to say hi.
:^D

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 1d

Have you seen this?

youtu.be/BYVQDc9T3sQ?...

"It's a Conversation Starter"

YouTube video by Please Clap Productions

youtu.be

1 1 5

Mitskimask The Slump God @mitskimask.bsky.social · 1d

CEOs will be like "We need to restructure. We are living beyond our means, we need to reign it in, gonna have to layoff some employees" and never once consider cutting their own bloated pay.