Paul Lander
@paullander.bsky.social
TV/comedy writer/Producer, award-winning columnist. His humor pieces have appeared in MAD, American Bystander, Weekly Humorist, McSweeneys, Humor Times, etc.
Pinned
Ripping the Headlines Today - Paul Lander, Humor Times
Making fun of headlines, like: "Bill Gates STI charges result of dispute Epstein mediated" - Apparently, Bill Gates has been playing XXX Box.
www.humortimes.com
Extra! Extra! Latest Ripping the Headlines Today, 2/9/26 - Paul Lander - @subs.humortimes.com
www.humortimes.com/417054/rippi...
www.humortimes.com/417054/rippi...
Reposted by Paul Lander
Olympic Villages Run Out of Condoms at 2026 Games Due to 'Higher-Than-Anticipated Demand' bringing new meaning to biathletes.
February 16, 2026 at 3:00 AM
Olympic Villages Run Out of Condoms at 2026 Games Due to 'Higher-Than-Anticipated Demand' bringing new meaning to biathletes.
A dozen states want to get rid of daylight saving time
The hope is to keep their citizens in the dark 24/7.
The hope is to keep their citizens in the dark 24/7.
February 16, 2026 at 3:42 AM
A dozen states want to get rid of daylight saving time
The hope is to keep their citizens in the dark 24/7.
The hope is to keep their citizens in the dark 24/7.
Reposted by Paul Lander
What McDonald's Employees Know About The Filet-O-Fish That Isn't Advertised. The people cooking it are more fried than the sandwich.
February 15, 2026 at 11:31 PM
What McDonald's Employees Know About The Filet-O-Fish That Isn't Advertised. The people cooking it are more fried than the sandwich.
Olympic Villages Run Out of Condoms at 2026 Games Due to 'Higher-Than-Anticipated Demand' bringing new meaning to biathletes.
February 16, 2026 at 3:00 AM
Olympic Villages Run Out of Condoms at 2026 Games Due to 'Higher-Than-Anticipated Demand' bringing new meaning to biathletes.
Reposted by Paul Lander
This week’s Karmic Kick in the Nuts goes to….
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Karmic Kick in the Nuts Award: Kid Rock
YouTube video by Pretty Damn Sketchy
www.youtube.com
February 16, 2026 at 12:18 AM
This week’s Karmic Kick in the Nuts goes to….
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
This week’s Karmic Kick in the Nuts goes to….
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Karmic Kick in the Nuts Award: Kid Rock
YouTube video by Pretty Damn Sketchy
www.youtube.com
February 16, 2026 at 12:18 AM
This week’s Karmic Kick in the Nuts goes to….
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Subscribe, like, say something nice.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ORSW...
Meghan Markle Reportedly Won't 'Play Nice' With Queen Camilla Amid Peace Talks After Accusing Her Of 'Trying To Destroy Her Reputation' For Years. This week on a very special Royal Family Feud
February 16, 2026 at 12:13 AM
Meghan Markle Reportedly Won't 'Play Nice' With Queen Camilla Amid Peace Talks After Accusing Her Of 'Trying To Destroy Her Reputation' For Years. This week on a very special Royal Family Feud
What McDonald's Employees Know About The Filet-O-Fish That Isn't Advertised. The people cooking it are more fried than the sandwich.
February 15, 2026 at 11:31 PM
What McDonald's Employees Know About The Filet-O-Fish That Isn't Advertised. The people cooking it are more fried than the sandwich.
Reposted by Paul Lander
Ty Cobb rips Trump admin over political attack. And then steals second…
February 15, 2026 at 7:20 PM
Ty Cobb rips Trump admin over political attack. And then steals second…
People Are Calling Barack Obama "A Class Act". Yup it’s the Class Act vs Crass Act
February 15, 2026 at 11:17 PM
People Are Calling Barack Obama "A Class Act". Yup it’s the Class Act vs Crass Act
Ty Cobb rips Trump admin over political attack. And then steals second…
February 15, 2026 at 7:20 PM
Ty Cobb rips Trump admin over political attack. And then steals second…
Reposted by Paul Lander
Thank ya Humor Outcasts, @dtcav.bsky.social for running this doodle by me and @cartoonydan.bsky.social
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
Cartoon: So easy a caveman could do it… oh wait…
Written by: Paul Lander Artist: Dan McConnell
humoroutcasts.com
February 15, 2026 at 6:49 PM
Thank ya Humor Outcasts, @dtcav.bsky.social for running this doodle by me and @cartoonydan.bsky.social
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
Thank ya Humor Outcasts, @dtcav.bsky.social for running this doodle by me and @cartoonydan.bsky.social
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
Cartoon: So easy a caveman could do it… oh wait…
Written by: Paul Lander Artist: Dan McConnell
humoroutcasts.com
February 15, 2026 at 6:49 PM
Thank ya Humor Outcasts, @dtcav.bsky.social for running this doodle by me and @cartoonydan.bsky.social
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
humoroutcasts.com/2026/cartoon...
Reposted by Paul Lander
Coast Guard Pilot Fired Over Kristi Noem’s Missing Blanket. Cosplay Linus, says what..
February 15, 2026 at 5:55 PM
Coast Guard Pilot Fired Over Kristi Noem’s Missing Blanket. Cosplay Linus, says what..
Reposted by Paul Lander
ICYMI: In 24 years, only 77 “illegals” have voted — representing 0.00000764% of total votes…
And the research comes from the far-right Heritage Foundation
electionfraud.heritage.org/search?combi...
And the research comes from the far-right Heritage Foundation
electionfraud.heritage.org/search?combi...
February 15, 2026 at 5:57 PM
ICYMI: In 24 years, only 77 “illegals” have voted — representing 0.00000764% of total votes…
And the research comes from the far-right Heritage Foundation
electionfraud.heritage.org/search?combi...
And the research comes from the far-right Heritage Foundation
electionfraud.heritage.org/search?combi...
Reposted by Paul Lander
Massie on ABC just now: “Donald Trump told us that even though he had dinner with these people in NYC and West Palm Beach, that he would be transparent. But he’s not. He’s still in with the Epstein class. This is the Epstein administration.”
February 15, 2026 at 5:31 PM
Massie on ABC just now: “Donald Trump told us that even though he had dinner with these people in NYC and West Palm Beach, that he would be transparent. But he’s not. He’s still in with the Epstein class. This is the Epstein administration.”
Coast Guard Pilot Fired Over Kristi Noem’s Missing Blanket. Cosplay Linus, says what..
February 15, 2026 at 5:55 PM
Coast Guard Pilot Fired Over Kristi Noem’s Missing Blanket. Cosplay Linus, says what..
Reposted by Paul Lander
Melania box office numbers went down faster than Donald did on Bill Clinton
February 9, 2026 at 10:06 PM
Melania box office numbers went down faster than Donald did on Bill Clinton
Reposted by Paul Lander
U.S. sinks to its lowest spot in new global corruption ranking. MAGA =Making Americans grift Again
February 10, 2026 at 7:32 PM
U.S. sinks to its lowest spot in new global corruption ranking. MAGA =Making Americans grift Again
Reposted by Paul Lander
Walmart sells health insurance
Although, I'm not sure I want a 7-year-old Chinese kid operating on me.
Although, I'm not sure I want a 7-year-old Chinese kid operating on me.
February 12, 2026 at 7:16 PM
Walmart sells health insurance
Although, I'm not sure I want a 7-year-old Chinese kid operating on me.
Although, I'm not sure I want a 7-year-old Chinese kid operating on me.
Reposted by Paul Lander
Super excited to facilitate a workshop for musicals in progress with the incredibly talented Shoshana Greenberg and Brett Macias! (I’ll be in the Zoom sessions to dig into book and lyrics with you.) Come hang with us and work on your show. 🎭✨
February 12, 2026 at 11:37 PM
Super excited to facilitate a workshop for musicals in progress with the incredibly talented Shoshana Greenberg and Brett Macias! (I’ll be in the Zoom sessions to dig into book and lyrics with you.) Come hang with us and work on your show. 🎭✨
Reposted by Paul Lander
New Jersey teacher who slept with students at family bagel shop learns prison sentence. Damn, sounds like she misunderstood her job teaching them how to multiply
February 13, 2026 at 7:45 PM
New Jersey teacher who slept with students at family bagel shop learns prison sentence. Damn, sounds like she misunderstood her job teaching them how to multiply
Reposted by Paul Lander
A man was running from police. Eight llamas caught him. No word if one was the Dalai Llama.
February 15, 2026 at 3:10 AM
A man was running from police. Eight llamas caught him. No word if one was the Dalai Llama.
Reposted by Paul Lander
Happy #Caturday
Quincy and Whitney look deeply contemplative and in the midst of serious discussions.
Perhaps, they’re in full swing writing of the next “great American novel” and are earnestly working on their more minor plot points and character arcs.
#Cats
#books
#literature
Quincy and Whitney look deeply contemplative and in the midst of serious discussions.
Perhaps, they’re in full swing writing of the next “great American novel” and are earnestly working on their more minor plot points and character arcs.
#Cats
#books
#literature
February 14, 2026 at 9:26 PM
Happy #Caturday
Quincy and Whitney look deeply contemplative and in the midst of serious discussions.
Perhaps, they’re in full swing writing of the next “great American novel” and are earnestly working on their more minor plot points and character arcs.
#Cats
#books
#literature
Quincy and Whitney look deeply contemplative and in the midst of serious discussions.
Perhaps, they’re in full swing writing of the next “great American novel” and are earnestly working on their more minor plot points and character arcs.
#Cats
#books
#literature
Reposted by Paul Lander
There are so many Trump officials in Epstein files he doesn’t have Cabinet meetings he has lineups.
February 15, 2026 at 3:31 PM
There are so many Trump officials in Epstein files he doesn’t have Cabinet meetings he has lineups.