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International world news for the capitalist class. Satirical. Parody account. Not Reuters. Brought to you by CBC Pitchbot
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Democrats vow to get more misogynistic in appeal to voting-age men
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Stocks open lower today as markets react to news of JD Vance killing the Pope
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BREAKING: 400 countries in active trade negotiations with the US, trade advisor says
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Stocks up higher after President Trump encourages markets to "BE COOL"
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BREAKING: Conservatives begin boycott of stock markets, citing anti-Trump bias
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BREAKING: US-backed President of South Korea Yoon Suk-yeol found guilty in martial law declaration, permanently removed from office
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Opinion | Not everyone you disagree with is a “Nazi”
Elon Musk gives a Nazi salute at Trump's inauguration
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Democrats vow to abandon new segment of their base every month until morale improves
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Florida Governor Ron DeSantis offers South Korean President Yoon political asylum
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Opinion | You can't even declare martial law these days with all the cancel culture going on.

by Yoon Suk-yeol
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Markets soar as South Korean President declares military dictatorship
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US police departments across the nation say they won't be disciplining officers found to be on membership lists of right-wing extremist organizations, saying it would cause a severe manpower shortage in every department
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Israel accuses civilian targets of embedding inside civilian areas
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The White House says the ICC arrest warrants against Israeli PM Netanyahu may scupper ongoing ceasefire negotiations that aren't actually happening