Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 8h

I don't know if I've ever been as delighted by seeing what a celebrity does on computer than when I saw Diane Keaton's Instagram was mostly just videos of her going to swap meets and dancing in a big empty room with a huge wooden cross in it. RIP big dog

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 12h

I just lost all my money funding an expedition to find the legendary Sword of Friendship only to be told MONTHS LATER there are no legends about a sword called that

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 12h

I'm very proud of everyone for not allowing themselves to be gaslit into thinking Tron is a big deal like with the last time they did a Tron. It's never important to watch or know about Tron

Cosmic Marvel @dailycosmicmarvel.bsky.social · 14h

‘TRON: ARES’ has earned $14.3M in its opening day at the domestic box office.

For comparison, ‘MORBIUS’ opened to $17.3M.

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Reposted by Ryland

Spice 💕 @spicedyde.bsky.social · 1d

🐶: “Very spooky! A corpse is a dead body.”

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 1d

They should invent a toilet for garbage and it all dumps out into the core of the Earth so it gets bigger, which I assume would be good

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 2d

To my critics I would simply like to say: silence, fiends!

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 2d

I know I say this a lot but if I could grow them back I would absolutely love to chop one of my fingers off. I'd do it every year on New Years Eve

Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 3d

is this a dinner where you watch tapirs fuck. Are they doing Eyes Wide Shut shit at the zoo in Canada

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 3d

okay sorry if you all knew this but I'm just finding out that Michael Mann looks like if you hit Werner Herzog with a De-Weirding Ray and it's fuckin with me

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 4d

I hope if they ever name a law after me it's a nice one. Ryland's Law means everyone has to help turtles or something. I don't want anybody shuddering thinking about what Happened to me

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 5d

you are always overcoming adversity. I'm going to put you in a cage made of sharp knifes, to help you become even more inspirational

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 5d

a dog born with three buttholes who any other dog that meets him thinks is god

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 6d

A good name for a baby would be Ralk. Betcha they won't run into another Ralk at school and have to be Ralk C.

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 7d

enjoying the new Taylor Swift record album youtu.be/5uvyyI3eOCU?...

BOTANICA WILDE: I AM YOUR WIFE

YouTube video by Botanica Wilde

youtu.be

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 7d

Sex and the City sequel that treats And Just Like That as a heretical text. Samantha is in it but via snapchat filter grade CGI. in the season finale they meet Che Diaz and shake hands while looking into the camera and saying "let's never meet again, wicked stranger"

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 8d

a bejeweled music box that plays The Impression That I Get by The Mighty Mighty Bosstones

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 10d

RIP to Jane Goodall, drowned by the mafia

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Reposted by Ryland

darn chaumbrelauwn @amfmpm.bsky.social · 10d

[lenny kravitz voice] ♬ I WANT TO PASS AWAY ♬

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 11d

I'm inventing a new lunch where it's a big juicy bratwurst that you place in handle shaped bun to make it into a pistol and when you bite it sometimes the bratwurst juices get on your face, and 1 in 10,000 is full of poison.

Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 12d

a guy who defines the classic era of The Simpsons as exclusively the Tracey Ullman Show shorts

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 13d

getting all the latest news about women from women dot com

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 14d

I know a million things happened since then but I'm still laughing about the speaker of the house saying Trump was on Epstein Island as like a secret agent and then everyone was like ok that can't possibly be true and he had to be like well uh it was a metaphor? Emotionally it was true?

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Reposted by Ryland

Raft @raft.bsky.social · 15d

Starting a pro scratching propaganda campaign

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 15d

a guy in Avatar who is late for work muttering cusses as he jams his ponytail over and over again into a dragon that refuses to wake up

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Ryland @rylandduncan.bsky.social · 16d

Burger King is introducing a new character called The Jester who starts physical fights with any dads eating with their families and if we wins the family is his now and the dad has to become the new Jester. They put up a sign so it's all legal

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