Simon Jessey
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scjessey.bsky.social
Simon Jessey
@scjessey.bsky.social
🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿 Englishman (living in the USA 🇺🇲)
📜 Municipal planning commissioner
🖖🏻 Star Trek fan
⚽ Tottenham Hotspur fan. COYS! 🤍
🏏 Surrey cricket fan
🏈 Philadelphia Eagles fan 🦅
📺 YouTuber "TrekkieMoto"
🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ straight ally
🤝 Joined August 30, 2023
Let's also bring back leaded gasoline, and maybe starter handles, and that guy who walked in front of the car with a red flag. Let's also figure out how we can make Cool Whip out of crude oil, although it'll have to have at least 15% ethanol because Iowa.
Sean Duffy on slashing fuel economy standards: "This rule will actually allow you to bring back the 1970s station wagon. Maybe a little wood paneling on the side. We can bring back choice to consumers."
December 4, 2025 at 2:17 PM
"Your package is delayed because of a delay in transit."

Is this the most useless shipping update ever?
December 4, 2025 at 11:49 AM
🏏 A useful last wicket stand from England will continue tomorrow! Shocking over rate from the Aussies in the 2nd Test of #TheAshes.
December 4, 2025 at 11:34 AM
Hopefully, this fucking guy will breathe air directly from his limo's tail pipe.

www.theguardian.com/us-news/2025...
Trump says he will repeal Biden-era fuel efficiency standards for cars and trucks
Move marks president’s latest effort to dismantle pollution regulations and support for cleaner-running vehicles
www.theguardian.com
December 3, 2025 at 11:28 PM
🏈 Announcing my availability for the head coach job at Penn State. I know fuck all about coaching but I like watching the game on TV and I like the idea of being paid a boatload of money.
December 3, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Insert a movie into another movie

Lawrence of Arabian Nights
Insert a movie into another movie

Guardians of the Galaxy Quest
Insert a movie into another movie

Paulie
December 3, 2025 at 12:21 PM
⚽ A badly-needed point away from home in a place we are traditionally terrible. But it still felt like #Spurs played negatively. Where's the passion?

#THFC #COYS
December 2, 2025 at 10:18 PM
⚽ I've said it many times before and I'll say it again. Get rid of Bentancur.

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
December 2, 2025 at 9:59 PM
⚽ I would argue that Brennan Johnson has been fantastic today. It's a shame everyone else has basically sucked.

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
December 2, 2025 at 9:47 PM
⚽ Did we switch commentary team on the US coverage?

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
December 2, 2025 at 8:47 PM
⚽ Can we please see some attacking football where we score more goals than the opposing team? Pretty please?

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
December 2, 2025 at 8:05 PM
Somebody told Trump he sold Coke and he thought they meant Diet Coke, so he pardoned him.

www.nytimes.com/2025/11/29/n...
The Ex-President Whom Trump Plans to Pardon Flooded America With Cocaine
www.nytimes.com
December 2, 2025 at 6:50 PM
I saw a car crash in my rearview mirror this morning. My dashcam caught it. 😬

youtu.be/ffX3YI7w_5M
💥 Car loses control, hits barrier and flips over 🚨
YouTube video by Simon Jessey
youtu.be
December 2, 2025 at 4:13 PM
I named my fists Nicolaus and Copernicus, because I need to remember not everything revolves around me.
I named my fists Phobos and Deimos, because MARS ATTACKS! ACKACKACKACKACKACKACK*

*each "Ack" is a punch
i named my fists Rodgers and Hammerstein cuz theyre always in my own little corner
December 1, 2025 at 4:39 AM
⚽ I cannot imagine ANY scenario where I might be encouraged to boo the Tottenham Hotspur players for their performance in a game. I just can't. I'm with them when we're good and I'm with them when we're bad. WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER.

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
November 30, 2025 at 7:31 PM
What the fuck is this white powdery shit?
November 30, 2025 at 3:17 PM
🏈 "A win for UNC will build momentum for the off season."

POLISH THAT TURD, ACC Network!

#Tarheels
November 30, 2025 at 12:37 AM
What the fuck is THIS shit? How is this not a MASSIVE violation of the Hatch Act.

DO WE EVEN CARE ABOUT LAWS ANYMORE?

www.whitehouse.gov/mediabias/
Media Offenders
Explore the Media Bias Tracker that fact checks and holds Fake News accountable. False claims debunked, Hall of Shame for serial offenders, Leaderboard of networks ranked by Repeated Lies. Stay inform...
www.whitehouse.gov
November 30, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Pro tip: it is MUCH easier to make Yorkshire puddings in one of these disposable muffin tins. They require less oil and the puddings pop right out without sticking. I've done it a few times now and they are perfect. The proof is in the puddings!

amzn.to/4otopMP
Waytiffer (10pack Muffin Pan 6-Cup Cupcake Aluminum Pans Favorite Muffin Tin Size for Baking Cupcakes Muffins and Mini Pies - Standard Size
amzn.to
November 30, 2025 at 12:06 AM
⚽ I am not amused.

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
November 29, 2025 at 9:54 PM
⚽ Fulham not afraid to cheat with some dives and fake injuries, I see.

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
November 29, 2025 at 8:42 PM


SPURS UNTIL THE DAY I DIE!

[ gets stabbed in the heart every game ]

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
November 29, 2025 at 8:24 PM
⚽ It all went to shit when we got sponsored by crypto bullshit.

#COYS #THFC #Spurs
November 29, 2025 at 8:22 PM
⚽ It was always going to be a struggle playing at the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium against the mighty Fulham with their galaxy of highly-paid stars. As long as we don't lose ALL our positive goal difference it will be a fantastic result.



#THFC #COYS #Spurs
November 29, 2025 at 8:20 PM