slurm king 👑
@slurm.bsky.social
the king of slurm! the emperor, even, of slurm!
Pinned
slurm king 👑
@slurm.bsky.social
· Nov 20
bro they are straight up analyzing your directorial intent right now… they’re literally deriving significance from your work’s formal elements, including but not limited to its mise-en-scène and sense of photogénie
woke toddler: umm why is hide-and-seek lowkey problematic?? 👀
February 5, 2026 at 3:08 AM
woke toddler: umm why is hide-and-seek lowkey problematic?? 👀
Reposted by slurm king 👑
ME: President Trump must answer for his crimes. This lawlessness cannot—
(hot pink playing cards explode around my face)
GAMBIT: Watch y' tone, cher. Dat man pregnant wit my own petit bébé.
(hot pink playing cards explode around my face)
GAMBIT: Watch y' tone, cher. Dat man pregnant wit my own petit bébé.
February 2, 2026 at 7:07 PM
ME: President Trump must answer for his crimes. This lawlessness cannot—
(hot pink playing cards explode around my face)
GAMBIT: Watch y' tone, cher. Dat man pregnant wit my own petit bébé.
(hot pink playing cards explode around my face)
GAMBIT: Watch y' tone, cher. Dat man pregnant wit my own petit bébé.
*news anchor being handed a piece of paper from offscreen*
and, i’m being told just now that greg bovino is currently being put in “the device”
and, i’m being told just now that greg bovino is currently being put in “the device”
January 27, 2026 at 6:39 AM
*news anchor being handed a piece of paper from offscreen*
and, i’m being told just now that greg bovino is currently being put in “the device”
and, i’m being told just now that greg bovino is currently being put in “the device”
last episode of MHA was sweet, good finale :)
January 14, 2026 at 6:05 PM
last episode of MHA was sweet, good finale :)
the leafs have whatever the opposite of the clutch gene is
January 4, 2026 at 2:42 AM
the leafs have whatever the opposite of the clutch gene is
hitting the ultimate woke: “happy holidays to all those who celebrate 😊”
December 25, 2025 at 3:58 PM
hitting the ultimate woke: “happy holidays to all those who celebrate 😊”
Wordle 1,644 3/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟨⬜⬜🟩🟨
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
yeah i’m fucking goated
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟨⬜⬜🟩🟨
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
yeah i’m fucking goated
December 19, 2025 at 7:23 PM
Wordle 1,644 3/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟨⬜⬜🟩🟨
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
yeah i’m fucking goated
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
🟨⬜⬜🟩🟨
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
yeah i’m fucking goated
the lion doesn’t concern himself with that pain radiating down his left arm
December 13, 2025 at 1:43 AM
the lion doesn’t concern himself with that pain radiating down his left arm
saw some discourse floating around on twitter, so i just have to say:
Carrie and Lowell is one of the greatest albums of all time. period. it is hauntingly, heartachingly, teeth-kickingly beautiful, and i would do anything to hear this album for the first time again.
that is all on the matter 👍
Carrie and Lowell is one of the greatest albums of all time. period. it is hauntingly, heartachingly, teeth-kickingly beautiful, and i would do anything to hear this album for the first time again.
that is all on the matter 👍
December 12, 2025 at 6:41 AM
saw some discourse floating around on twitter, so i just have to say:
Carrie and Lowell is one of the greatest albums of all time. period. it is hauntingly, heartachingly, teeth-kickingly beautiful, and i would do anything to hear this album for the first time again.
that is all on the matter 👍
Carrie and Lowell is one of the greatest albums of all time. period. it is hauntingly, heartachingly, teeth-kickingly beautiful, and i would do anything to hear this album for the first time again.
that is all on the matter 👍
might rewatch Barry
December 11, 2025 at 6:47 AM
might rewatch Barry
Reposted by slurm king 👑
Just finished a delicious thanksgiving meal of collard greens and oxtail, shout out gam gam!
November 30, 2024 at 2:02 AM
Just finished a delicious thanksgiving meal of collard greens and oxtail, shout out gam gam!
writing an open letter to the mouse in my apartment
November 18, 2025 at 1:04 AM
writing an open letter to the mouse in my apartment
can’t wait for the 100 neolib think pieces to come out next week attributing this win to anything and everything except for the fact that he ran on (popular) socialist policy
November 5, 2025 at 3:49 AM
can’t wait for the 100 neolib think pieces to come out next week attributing this win to anything and everything except for the fact that he ran on (popular) socialist policy
put it in the louvre
October 30, 2025 at 3:46 AM
put it in the louvre
bro doesn’t know macduff was from his mother’s womb untimely ripped 🤣🤣😂😂 🫵😂
October 29, 2025 at 4:20 AM
bro doesn’t know macduff was from his mother’s womb untimely ripped 🤣🤣😂😂 🫵😂
eric lauer’s arm tomorrow
a tray of food on a table with tito 's vodka in the background
ALT: a tray of food on a table with tito 's vodka in the background
media.tenor.com
October 28, 2025 at 5:55 AM
eric lauer’s arm tomorrow
let’s fucking do this jays. let’s fucking do this
October 25, 2025 at 12:12 AM
let’s fucking do this jays. let’s fucking do this
You’ve got a diamond 💎 You’ve got nine men 🍁 You’ve got a hat 🧢 a bat 🦇 and that’s not all 🍁 You’ve got the bleachers 🏟️ Got ‘Em from spring till fall 🌸 You got a dog 🌭 and a drink 🥃 And the umpires call 👨🦯 Waddaya want? Let’s play ball ⚾️! Okay (Okay) Blue Jays (Blue Jays) 🍁 Let’s play ball ⚾️!
October 21, 2025 at 3:44 AM
You’ve got a diamond 💎 You’ve got nine men 🍁 You’ve got a hat 🧢 a bat 🦇 and that’s not all 🍁 You’ve got the bleachers 🏟️ Got ‘Em from spring till fall 🌸 You got a dog 🌭 and a drink 🥃 And the umpires call 👨🦯 Waddaya want? Let’s play ball ⚾️! Okay (Okay) Blue Jays (Blue Jays) 🍁 Let’s play ball ⚾️!
I LOVE THE JAYS SO MUCH
holy shit i’m shaking, i’m about to throw up
October 21, 2025 at 3:10 AM
I LOVE THE JAYS SO MUCH