Scott Stein
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sstein.bsky.social
Scott Stein
@sstein.bsky.social
Latest novel: THE GREAT AMERICAN BETRAYAL "Best Comedy Books of 2022" —Vulture

English professor, novelist, satirist, editor, father, husband, dog owner, gardener

https://scottsteinonline.com
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If you're a literary/film agent or work in animation, television, streaming, comics, video games, my novels are available for adaptation. They've been compared to Douglas Adams, Twin Peaks meets Futurama, Monty Python meets Sam Spade. See reviews from Publishers Weekly (starred), Vulture, Kirkus.
The first chapter of P. G. Wodehouse's THE CODE OF THE WOOSTERS is a masterclass in setting up a novel. My MFA students study the opening scenes. The whole book is a lesson in escalation and structure. Plus, it's hilarious.
January 22, 2026 at 12:56 PM
Finished rereading THE TRIAL for tomorrow’s class. Didn’t have a happy ending this time either.
January 21, 2026 at 10:34 PM
Just spent an hour at my MIL's looking through papers, trying and failing to find a social security document the housing people say is needed for certification, whatever that is. Anyway, back to reading Kafka's The Trial for tomorrow's class.
January 21, 2026 at 7:39 PM
Current mood: reading the final 50 pages of THE TRIAL
January 21, 2026 at 3:13 PM
My recently updated and reformatted CV is on my author website.

scottsteinonline.com/wp-content/u...
scottsteinonline.com
January 21, 2026 at 12:46 PM
Reposted by Scott Stein
People with "No DMs" in their profile are admitting that their D&D campaigns are anarchy.
January 20, 2026 at 12:50 PM
It's appropriate that Chuck Schumer is talking about a bucket list since the country is about to kick one.
January 20, 2026 at 3:27 PM
Some people thought they were electing Henry, found out he was Vecna, and liked that even better.
January 20, 2026 at 3:23 PM
Greenland shouldn't be wearing that short skirt.
Scott Bessent said to our allies, vis Greenland:

“Sit back, take a deep breath, do not retaliate."

Surprised he didn't add "you'll enjoy this" or "come on you know you want it."
January 20, 2026 at 2:59 PM
A couple of SEPTA train lines are not running so I’m teaching on zoom from home. Of course, by the time I heard the announcement, I’d already gone to the station, paid for parking, and scanned my card to pay for the train. Appropriate, I guess, for my Kafka class today.
January 20, 2026 at 2:48 PM
People with "No DMs" in their profile are admitting that their D&D campaigns are anarchy.
January 20, 2026 at 12:50 PM
Shoveled snow. Read 50 pages of The Trial to prepare for tomorrow’s class. Now cheering on the Hurricanes. I contain multitudes.
January 20, 2026 at 12:54 AM
Collapse of society will have to wait a few hours. Go Canes!
January 19, 2026 at 11:59 PM
To the terrible human being who stole my 84-yo MIL’s debit card number and fraudulently spent nearly $4,000, mostly on Uber Eats: I wish you incurable hiccups, and everlasting anal itching in an unreachable spot, and probably something more violent that I should not describe in detail.
January 18, 2026 at 11:59 PM
Since people are talking about First Amendment zones for protestors...
My 2022 novel The Great American Betrayal has a protest scene. The police (GAS) keep order while protecting free speech (pages 97-101). Maybe it's funnier than the real world.

“Consistently dances on the edge of absurdity; it’s a great and witty time.” —Vulture.com “The Best Comedy Books of 2022”
January 18, 2026 at 5:22 PM
The First Amendment is not alternate side street parking
BRENNAN: Noem called on your to set up a safe zone where protest would be contained. Is that something you're looking at?

JACOB FREY: First Amendment speech is not limited to one park or one section of the city. You're allowed to protest so long as you're doing it peacefully
January 18, 2026 at 4:40 PM
Remember that Bessent's military expertise is the same as mine minus having read any books ever.
January 18, 2026 at 3:13 PM
The United States will win the next world war as long as it's a wet T-shirt contest
Ending NATO because we're so hot, how is this a thing
Bessent on Greenland: "Peace through strength. Make it part of the US and there will not be a conflict because the US right now, we're the hottest country in the world, we're the strongest country in the world. Europeans project weakness. The US projects strength."
January 18, 2026 at 3:08 PM
"You should see the United States in a bikini. Would blow your mind!"
"We're the hottest country in the world."

Can you even hear yourself, man? Do you not have any self-respect left at this point?
Bessent on Greenland: "Peace through strength. Make it part of the US and there will not be a conflict because the US right now, we're the hottest country in the world, we're the strongest country in the world. Europeans project weakness. The US projects strength."
January 18, 2026 at 2:42 PM
No new pictures. Where are you at mentally?
January 18, 2026 at 2:36 PM
Salary disclosure in the academic job market.
January 18, 2026 at 2:10 PM
Reposted by Scott Stein
Making a bumper sticker for my fellow fiction writers:

I DIG PLOT HOLES

(Also good for cemetery workers)
January 16, 2026 at 10:59 PM
Making a bumper sticker for my fellow fiction writers:

I DIG PLOT HOLES

(Also good for cemetery workers)
January 16, 2026 at 10:59 PM
Treaded States of America
“Yeah, it’s don’t tread on *me*, I’m very happy to tread on you”
So, if I'm following all this correctly, a bunch of internet shitposters who spent years screaming "don't tread on me" and warning about federal agents stomping out people's rights... have been hired as ICE agents to go around breaking into people's homes, kidnapping & shooting them
January 16, 2026 at 1:35 AM
Trivia night at local Bucks County, PA brewery.
January 16, 2026 at 1:28 AM