Jeff Despres
@tealshark.ca
Take nothing I post seriously. Do not exceed 12 caplets in a 24-hour period.
Fredericton, New Brunswick
Fredericton, New Brunswick
Pinned
Jeff Despres
@tealshark.ca
· Nov 16
My go-to security blanket shows are Community, 30 Rock, Arrested Development, Better Off Ted and Mystery Science Theater 3000.
If you understand those, you understand me.
If you understand those, you understand me.
The solution to the Fredericton bridge problem is simple:
A launcher (called the Car-a-Pult™) is installed along the river on each side. You pull your vehicle in and it is launched across the river where a giant circus net catches you. Then, a crane gently lifts you out and places you on the road.
A launcher (called the Car-a-Pult™) is installed along the river on each side. You pull your vehicle in and it is launched across the river where a giant circus net catches you. Then, a crane gently lifts you out and places you on the road.
December 16, 2025 at 7:57 PM
The solution to the Fredericton bridge problem is simple:
A launcher (called the Car-a-Pult™) is installed along the river on each side. You pull your vehicle in and it is launched across the river where a giant circus net catches you. Then, a crane gently lifts you out and places you on the road.
A launcher (called the Car-a-Pult™) is installed along the river on each side. You pull your vehicle in and it is launched across the river where a giant circus net catches you. Then, a crane gently lifts you out and places you on the road.
Was the movie A Nightmare on Elm Street just a metaphoric warning for the dangers of untreated sleep apnea?
December 15, 2025 at 9:57 PM
Was the movie A Nightmare on Elm Street just a metaphoric warning for the dangers of untreated sleep apnea?
Fun fact: There are only 1,364 humans on the planet that have not recorded a cover of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah".
December 12, 2025 at 1:03 AM
Fun fact: There are only 1,364 humans on the planet that have not recorded a cover of Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah".
Oh, I am not looking forward to all of that mess out there freezing over later today.
December 11, 2025 at 3:38 PM
Oh, I am not looking forward to all of that mess out there freezing over later today.
I’m finally getting my winter tires on tomorrow.
I’m pretty sure my current all-seasons are actively trying to kill me, Stephen King short story style. (You can have that one for free, Mr. King.)
I’m pretty sure my current all-seasons are actively trying to kill me, Stephen King short story style. (You can have that one for free, Mr. King.)
December 8, 2025 at 11:04 PM
I’m finally getting my winter tires on tomorrow.
I’m pretty sure my current all-seasons are actively trying to kill me, Stephen King short story style. (You can have that one for free, Mr. King.)
I’m pretty sure my current all-seasons are actively trying to kill me, Stephen King short story style. (You can have that one for free, Mr. King.)
Here I am, looking at my 1989 Lawn Darts World Championships Peace Prize like a schmuck.
December 5, 2025 at 10:17 PM
Here I am, looking at my 1989 Lawn Darts World Championships Peace Prize like a schmuck.
The soundtrack from the movie "Josie and the Pussycats" is easily one of my favourite albums. Those songs can really get me hyped to get something done or ready for a big meeting.
December 5, 2025 at 1:33 PM
The soundtrack from the movie "Josie and the Pussycats" is easily one of my favourite albums. Those songs can really get me hyped to get something done or ready for a big meeting.
I appreciate app creators that offer a lifetime purchase option rather than just subscription models for software that would continue to function without issue if the company were to shut down today.
December 1, 2025 at 8:16 PM
I appreciate app creators that offer a lifetime purchase option rather than just subscription models for software that would continue to function without issue if the company were to shut down today.
It’s Chipman Community Care Christmas Telethon day. We are live tonight raising money for families in need on Rogers tv Fredericton (cable 10) and online at RogersTV.com/chipman
Rogers tv - Home
The number one destination for communities to stay connected. We focus on locally produced shows made by the volunteers and local producers from your community.
RogersTV.com
November 30, 2025 at 5:00 PM
It’s Chipman Community Care Christmas Telethon day. We are live tonight raising money for families in need on Rogers tv Fredericton (cable 10) and online at RogersTV.com/chipman
Reposted by Jeff Despres
A third - and maybe a fourth - bridge for city? tj.news/fredericton-...
November 26, 2025 at 8:30 PM
A third - and maybe a fourth - bridge for city? tj.news/fredericton-...
Reposted by Jeff Despres
NEW from me...
Milestone hit.
Half a million fewer New Brunswickers have travelled to Maine since the beginning of Trump's second presidency
September and October passenger vehicle figures now available, they continue to show a dramatic decline in visits
tj.news/new-brunswic... #NB
Milestone hit.
Half a million fewer New Brunswickers have travelled to Maine since the beginning of Trump's second presidency
September and October passenger vehicle figures now available, they continue to show a dramatic decline in visits
tj.news/new-brunswic... #NB
Half a million fewer NBers have travelled to Maine since Trump presidency
The year over year milestone comes as the U.S. releases new monthly data that continues to show a dramatic decline in visits
tj.news
November 20, 2025 at 3:44 PM
NEW from me...
Milestone hit.
Half a million fewer New Brunswickers have travelled to Maine since the beginning of Trump's second presidency
September and October passenger vehicle figures now available, they continue to show a dramatic decline in visits
tj.news/new-brunswic... #NB
Milestone hit.
Half a million fewer New Brunswickers have travelled to Maine since the beginning of Trump's second presidency
September and October passenger vehicle figures now available, they continue to show a dramatic decline in visits
tj.news/new-brunswic... #NB
I was so disappointed when I clicked through and it wasn't the watermelon smashing comedian.
November 10, 2025 at 9:03 PM
I was so disappointed when I clicked through and it wasn't the watermelon smashing comedian.
I bought a pasta maker and this is either going to be the best decision I ever made, or the worst.
So far, I've made spaghetti, macaroni and rice noodles. And while it's probably much more convenient to just buy them at the store and boil, there's something magical about making them yourself.
So far, I've made spaghetti, macaroni and rice noodles. And while it's probably much more convenient to just buy them at the store and boil, there's something magical about making them yourself.
November 7, 2025 at 6:31 PM
I bought a pasta maker and this is either going to be the best decision I ever made, or the worst.
So far, I've made spaghetti, macaroni and rice noodles. And while it's probably much more convenient to just buy them at the store and boil, there's something magical about making them yourself.
So far, I've made spaghetti, macaroni and rice noodles. And while it's probably much more convenient to just buy them at the store and boil, there's something magical about making them yourself.
Reposted by Jeff Despres
"Conservative Alberta MP Matt Jeneroux announced Thursday he is resigning from the House of Commons, according to statement shared with CBC News, a decision that comes after rumours swirled this week that he was considering crossing the floor to the Liberals."
Conservative MP Matt Jeneroux announces resignation from Parliament | CBC News
Conservative Alberta MP Matt Jeneroux announced Thursday he is resigning from the House of Commons, according to statement shared with CBC News, a decision that comes after rumours swirled this week t...
www.cbc.ca
November 6, 2025 at 10:55 PM
"Conservative Alberta MP Matt Jeneroux announced Thursday he is resigning from the House of Commons, according to statement shared with CBC News, a decision that comes after rumours swirled this week that he was considering crossing the floor to the Liberals."
Reposted by Jeff Despres
🚨🚨🚨 The jury has reached a verdict. Sean Dunn, aka the DC Sandwich Guy, has been found NOT GUILTY of assault.
November 6, 2025 at 7:25 PM
🚨🚨🚨 The jury has reached a verdict. Sean Dunn, aka the DC Sandwich Guy, has been found NOT GUILTY of assault.
Reposted by Jeff Despres
Vehicle Voltron has lived rent-free in my head inexplicably for 40 years.
November 6, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Vehicle Voltron has lived rent-free in my head inexplicably for 40 years.
Reposted by Jeff Despres
November 3, 2025 at 5:56 PM
Reposted by Jeff Despres
I'll be writing about the budget's effect on science and universities this week, so if you're a Canadian scientist with Opinions, reach out once we know what's in it this evening. 🧪
November 4, 2025 at 12:56 PM
I'll be writing about the budget's effect on science and universities this week, so if you're a Canadian scientist with Opinions, reach out once we know what's in it this evening. 🧪
Reposted by Jeff Despres
‘It’s 2025’: N.B. plans to scrap licence plate stickers tj.news/new-brunswic...
November 5, 2025 at 11:00 PM
‘It’s 2025’: N.B. plans to scrap licence plate stickers tj.news/new-brunswic...
The budget is great news for people who've always wanted a smaller yacht that can be vomitously deployed out of the front hull of their larger yacht.
November 4, 2025 at 11:58 PM
The budget is great news for people who've always wanted a smaller yacht that can be vomitously deployed out of the front hull of their larger yacht.
Reposted by Jeff Despres
NBCC Fredericton is offering FREE classes for those 60+.
Limited seats available. First Come First Serve
Limited seats available. First Come First Serve
November 4, 2025 at 4:42 PM
NBCC Fredericton is offering FREE classes for those 60+.
Limited seats available. First Come First Serve
Limited seats available. First Come First Serve
Reposted by Jeff Despres
Still need more baseball?
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
November 3, 2025 at 7:31 PM
Still need more baseball?
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
We found a CD in our archives containing dozens of unused voice lines from MLB Slugfest 20-03 rejected by the MLB. Here's some of our favorites.
I haven’t been at the Atlantic Superstore on Smythe for a long while… what the hell did they do to that place? It feels like a government check point before a prison that somehow also stocks rigatoni.
I used to enjoy going there.
I used to enjoy going there.
November 4, 2025 at 1:12 AM
I haven’t been at the Atlantic Superstore on Smythe for a long while… what the hell did they do to that place? It feels like a government check point before a prison that somehow also stocks rigatoni.
I used to enjoy going there.
I used to enjoy going there.
Teen Vogue was one of my go-tos for reliable political journalism. With a lack of eloquence, this sucks.
I was laid off from Teen Vogue today along with multiple other staffers, and today is my last day.
certainly more to come from me when the dust has settled more, but to my knowledge, after today, there will be no politics staffers at Teen Vogue.
certainly more to come from me when the dust has settled more, but to my knowledge, after today, there will be no politics staffers at Teen Vogue.
November 3, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Teen Vogue was one of my go-tos for reliable political journalism. With a lack of eloquence, this sucks.