Jonathan Edward Durham
@thisone0verhere.bsky.social
Writer. Reader. Sometimes funny. Generalized anxiety Wunderkind. Author of “Winterset Hollow.” https://jonathanedwarddurham.substack.com
http://Patreon.com/jonathanedwarddurham
https://jonathanedwarddurham.com
http://Patreon.com/jonathanedwarddurham
https://jonathanedwarddurham.com
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Hey folks! Do you hate the Sunday scaries but love and/or tolerate my humor? Well you’re in luck, because I’m writing a weekly humor column! (screaming crying throwing up etc) It’s called “Know Worries” and the first issue is up now on my substack and Patreon! And it’s free! Links below and in bio!
I wanna hear your best holiday disaster stories. The one everyone still talks about. Allll the details please.
November 25, 2025 at 8:00 PM
I wanna hear your best holiday disaster stories. The one everyone still talks about. Allll the details please.
And on top of everything else now I have a twitchy eye
November 25, 2025 at 6:09 PM
And on top of everything else now I have a twitchy eye
Okay guys I’ve got my frozen turkey, I’ve filled this pot of scalding hot oil all the way to the brim, I’ve gathered the family around to watch and I’m about to hit record, oh man this is gonna be legendary
November 25, 2025 at 5:20 PM
Okay guys I’ve got my frozen turkey, I’ve filled this pot of scalding hot oil all the way to the brim, I’ve gathered the family around to watch and I’m about to hit record, oh man this is gonna be legendary
1) melatonin
2) breathing exercises
3) white noise machine
4) fan on
5) pajamas
6) special pillow
7) 90 minutes of screen time
2) breathing exercises
3) white noise machine
4) fan on
5) pajamas
6) special pillow
7) 90 minutes of screen time
November 25, 2025 at 4:12 PM
1) melatonin
2) breathing exercises
3) white noise machine
4) fan on
5) pajamas
6) special pillow
7) 90 minutes of screen time
2) breathing exercises
3) white noise machine
4) fan on
5) pajamas
6) special pillow
7) 90 minutes of screen time
Roses are red, violets are blue
November 24, 2025 at 11:42 PM
Roses are red, violets are blue
I think my big problem is that I have absolutely no issue whatsoever agreeing to things that are more than six weeks away because that’s so far in the future that it doesn’t even exist to me
November 24, 2025 at 4:37 PM
I think my big problem is that I have absolutely no issue whatsoever agreeing to things that are more than six weeks away because that’s so far in the future that it doesn’t even exist to me
I wonder if this is how the ancient Greeks felt just watching their lives get absolutely rag-dolled time and time again by their assigned cast of useless idiot gods
November 24, 2025 at 4:20 PM
I wonder if this is how the ancient Greeks felt just watching their lives get absolutely rag-dolled time and time again by their assigned cast of useless idiot gods
I can’t imagine how hard it is to raise a barn in this world
November 24, 2025 at 3:45 PM
I can’t imagine how hard it is to raise a barn in this world
ME: why does everybody keep asking if im okay?
ALSO ME (all day long with my stupid face):
ALSO ME (all day long with my stupid face):
November 24, 2025 at 3:37 PM
ME: why does everybody keep asking if im okay?
ALSO ME (all day long with my stupid face):
ALSO ME (all day long with my stupid face):
My cat has a very specific (there’s a spider that’s too high for me to kill) alert and I appreciate the shit outta him for it
November 23, 2025 at 7:30 PM
My cat has a very specific (there’s a spider that’s too high for me to kill) alert and I appreciate the shit outta him for it
Oh yall think I’m not taking this Thanksgiving dinner thing seriously? Behold, my cheese board
November 23, 2025 at 5:02 PM
Oh yall think I’m not taking this Thanksgiving dinner thing seriously? Behold, my cheese board
Well it's Sunday. And you know what happens on Sunday? Show-and-tell happens on Sunday! So show us something you made or found, somewhere you've been, something you're proud of, family, pets... anything neat, really! Go on! Show us!
November 23, 2025 at 4:46 PM
Well it's Sunday. And you know what happens on Sunday? Show-and-tell happens on Sunday! So show us something you made or found, somewhere you've been, something you're proud of, family, pets... anything neat, really! Go on! Show us!
No no…we’re listening
November 23, 2025 at 4:27 PM
No no…we’re listening
Listen if you don’t constantly rotate while you sleep you will be unevenly cooked
November 23, 2025 at 4:16 PM
Listen if you don’t constantly rotate while you sleep you will be unevenly cooked
Every year it is somehow darker and colder earlier than I was expecting
November 23, 2025 at 4:15 PM
Every year it is somehow darker and colder earlier than I was expecting
Friendly reminder that the weekend before Thanksgiving is officially the beginning of holiday stress season which means it’s alllll mashed potatoes and anxiety meds from here on out baby so lock in
November 23, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Friendly reminder that the weekend before Thanksgiving is officially the beginning of holiday stress season which means it’s alllll mashed potatoes and anxiety meds from here on out baby so lock in
Reject modernity, embrace tradition
November 23, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Reject modernity, embrace tradition
A masterclass in headline writing
November 23, 2025 at 3:55 PM
A masterclass in headline writing
My interior design aesthetic is what I call ‘ancient Egyptian burial chamber’ and that’s where the purpose of every single room in my house is to surround me with enough of my favorite things to last me through the afterlife
November 23, 2025 at 3:38 PM
My interior design aesthetic is what I call ‘ancient Egyptian burial chamber’ and that’s where the purpose of every single room in my house is to surround me with enough of my favorite things to last me through the afterlife
In my day cell phones had only one button, if you wanted to text somebody “hiya” you had to press that button 8 times for H and then 9 times for Y and then 25 times for…
November 23, 2025 at 3:27 PM
In my day cell phones had only one button, if you wanted to text somebody “hiya” you had to press that button 8 times for H and then 9 times for Y and then 25 times for…
Hardest royal fit of all time
November 23, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Hardest royal fit of all time
I don’t need an HDTV I need an ADHDTV that knows when I break eye contact to play on my phone and has a button that skips my show right back to that point
November 22, 2025 at 8:51 PM
I don’t need an HDTV I need an ADHDTV that knows when I break eye contact to play on my phone and has a button that skips my show right back to that point
A bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch is a top tier dopamine delivery mechanism
November 22, 2025 at 5:20 PM
A bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch is a top tier dopamine delivery mechanism
Thinking about the time my friends and I skipped school to go see the phantom menace when it premiered and somehow our principal figured it out and called us into his office but didn’t punish us because he also saw it and decided we’d been through enough
November 22, 2025 at 5:15 PM
Thinking about the time my friends and I skipped school to go see the phantom menace when it premiered and somehow our principal figured it out and called us into his office but didn’t punish us because he also saw it and decided we’d been through enough