Thoughtbarf
@thoughtbarf.bsky.social
Stop by for some absurdity, stay for the laughs.
Done with adulting.
I want to be a croissant in Paris
I want to be a croissant in Paris
December 6, 2025 at 3:02 PM
Done with adulting.
I want to be a croissant in Paris
I want to be a croissant in Paris
Watch the reels I sent you.
December 6, 2025 at 3:02 PM
Watch the reels I sent you.
Just paid rent.
Now i have a place to starve in.
Now i have a place to starve in.
December 5, 2025 at 1:33 PM
Just paid rent.
Now i have a place to starve in.
Now i have a place to starve in.
Them: "always stay positive."
Me: *Falls down the stairs*
Me: "wow I got downstairs so fast!"
Me: *Falls down the stairs*
Me: "wow I got downstairs so fast!"
December 4, 2025 at 7:15 AM
Them: "always stay positive."
Me: *Falls down the stairs*
Me: "wow I got downstairs so fast!"
Me: *Falls down the stairs*
Me: "wow I got downstairs so fast!"
*me to myself* Is she bothering you?
December 4, 2025 at 7:14 AM
*me to myself* Is she bothering you?
Do beavers know what they're doing or just see water going down a river and go, "absolutely not"
December 4, 2025 at 7:13 AM
Do beavers know what they're doing or just see water going down a river and go, "absolutely not"
Just gave your address to a mosquito
December 3, 2025 at 8:34 AM
Just gave your address to a mosquito
Poke your finger in someone's mouth when they're yawning to establish dominance
December 3, 2025 at 8:34 AM
Poke your finger in someone's mouth when they're yawning to establish dominance
Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread, and put it back in the bag.
December 3, 2025 at 8:33 AM
Gonna break into your house, toast all your bread, and put it back in the bag.
Me: "I'm still young, I can do this."
My body: "The fuck you are."
My body: "The fuck you are."
December 3, 2025 at 8:32 AM
Me: "I'm still young, I can do this."
My body: "The fuck you are."
My body: "The fuck you are."
Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look what you've done.
December 1, 2025 at 7:46 PM
Stop avoiding your banking app. Go look what you've done.
Cows are very calm considering the whole floor is food
December 1, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Cows are very calm considering the whole floor is food
*Me stumbling out of bed:* "Deloris, hold all my calls for today."
Deloris, a house plant:
Deloris, a house plant:
December 1, 2025 at 5:33 PM
*Me stumbling out of bed:* "Deloris, hold all my calls for today."
Deloris, a house plant:
Deloris, a house plant:
Time for bed.
But first let me figure everything out
But first let me figure everything out
December 1, 2025 at 5:32 PM
Time for bed.
But first let me figure everything out
But first let me figure everything out
Sorry I can't go out tonight. I'm at home sitting down.
December 1, 2025 at 8:22 AM
Sorry I can't go out tonight. I'm at home sitting down.
Your anxiety is a lying little hoe
December 1, 2025 at 8:22 AM
Your anxiety is a lying little hoe
Thank you for contacting the abyss. Your scream is very important to us.
December 1, 2025 at 8:22 AM
Thank you for contacting the abyss. Your scream is very important to us.
Today I'm choosing kindness...
But we'll see... it's still early...
But we'll see... it's still early...
November 25, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Today I'm choosing kindness...
But we'll see... it's still early...
But we'll see... it's still early...
I'm sorry for being annoying.
It will happen again.
It will happen again.
November 25, 2025 at 4:12 PM
I'm sorry for being annoying.
It will happen again.
It will happen again.
One day I'll shut up.
Not today though.
Not today though.
November 25, 2025 at 4:11 PM
One day I'll shut up.
Not today though.
Not today though.
Adulting is soup and I am a fork
November 24, 2025 at 7:23 AM
Adulting is soup and I am a fork
Why did you text me in that tone
November 24, 2025 at 7:23 AM
Why did you text me in that tone
I'm sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt
November 24, 2025 at 7:22 AM
I'm sorry I roasted you, I was trying to flirt
Anyone know what time it is?
November 23, 2025 at 9:00 AM
Anyone know what time it is?