Tim Yocum
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tky.io
Tim Yocum
@tky.io
I get paid to press buttons on the Internet. Literally and quite often figuratively.

✶ ✶ ✶ ✶, Urbs in Horto, etc.
I sure do love a good documentary and “jo nesbo’s detective hole” sounds mysterious and saucy.
These fraught times call for a show with what is either an intentionally or unintentionally hilarious title, and which I will be talking about for the rest of the year
January 29, 2026 at 3:00 AM
Reposted by Tim Yocum
"I'd be enjoying this a lot more if your husband was dead."
Something you can say during sex and at the Melania movie.
January 28, 2026 at 5:41 PM
El Centro, CA residents: get your whistles ready for your shortest resident’s homecoming.
January 27, 2026 at 1:56 AM
This machine kills fascists
January 25, 2026 at 11:57 PM
Reposted by Tim Yocum
A number of people from out-of-state have been opening tabs at small businesses—coffee shops where people on patrol can grab a drink and warm up, bars where people can be in community, etc. It’s been a deeply appreciated form of solidarity and helps the businesses closing tomorrow.
how (if at all) can we support the minnesota general strike on friday from afar?
January 23, 2026 at 4:27 AM
post a car picture you took
January 19, 2026 at 5:28 AM
FYI if this kind of thing makes you mad, you should know that you can call up a school and pay off these asinine lunch debts.
We have unlimited money for paramilitary forces that kidnap people off the streets but also have something called "school lunch debt" what are we doing here
January 18, 2026 at 4:41 AM
Reposted by Tim Yocum
Everybody thinks 'https://' stands for 'hypertext transfer protocol secure' but it actually stands for 'head to this place, sucka' followed by a colon and two laser sounds
January 13, 2026 at 8:17 PM
A zillion hot takes already had but I find this video absolutely stunning. The Fed won’t fart in public for fear of influencing the Depends market. They debate every word they write and say.

I haven’t translated his blinks to Morse code but this is a hostage video plea for help. Grim.
January 12, 2026 at 1:57 AM
Shout out to my high school bullies, library nerd ain’t a bad play now, IS IT
If conservatives ever went to libraries, they would know to omit that comma
January 6, 2026 at 3:52 AM
A reminder that the US has kidnapped a head of state and spouse in a live-fire military invasion for “drugs” while the Sackler family walks free.
January 3, 2026 at 12:03 PM
is there a labeler that can help me filter out x screenshots posted here? it's unnecessary rage bait that should stay inside the electric hate fence.
January 3, 2026 at 1:10 AM
I have bronchitis *and* flu-a, and my four year old just informed us that she would like to begin living alone due to terrible parenting (e.g, bedtime)

“Wait until you hear from Fritz Kaegi” was the retort. Instead of “no” we’re just going to get her a young start hating property valuation & tax.
January 2, 2026 at 4:56 AM
~60 pounds ago, I was buying a t-shirt at the Apple store and ran into Tim Cook. He was very kind; his assistant was extremely antsy because they were running late to a meeting or something. Cook didn't care. He chatted and graciously posed for a selfie. Good thing I hadn't showered or shaved yet...
December 30, 2025 at 6:23 PM
Mid-20s: lights come on at the bar; sudden realization everyone else is gone

Mid-40s: lights dim at Costco; sudden realization they’d like you to leave
December 29, 2025 at 1:24 AM
Having a child whose clothing size is “6-7” might be the trigger that gets me into a non-consensual straitjacket.
December 28, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Not sure I agree. I have the flattest of flat asses and oh did you know the F40PH locomotive can generate 2.4 MW? Also that picture frame is absolutely crooked.

(Alt text provided for accessibility and clarity.)
December 28, 2025 at 2:45 AM
Vibe coding lifecycle in 5 seconds
another robot highlight for 2025: man wearing humanoid mocap suit kicks himself in the balls
December 27, 2025 at 7:00 PM
I missed one and I’m not telling which because it’s embarrassing and I knew right after I tapped.

Confirmation that I’m both plugged in perhaps too much and occasionally illiterate.
✶✶ How closely did you follow Chicago local news in 2025? ✶✶

Take the quiz to find out!

📰 🏙️ 🤓

lauriemerrell.com/chicago-news...
Chicago Local News Quiz 2025
Chicago local news quiz 2025
lauriemerrell.com
December 26, 2025 at 7:53 PM
Yes, people do use @theonion.com’s wrapping paper inserts in case you were wondering. Also, passersby were amazed by the unusually large amounts of blood
December 24, 2025 at 11:15 PM
Been a 🏴‍☠️ through the 90s (ask your parents about IRC & FTP) and now I’m torrenting… 60 Minutes? We were supposed to be scared of the RIAA over our MP3 stash, not CBS over the news.

Anyway, honor remains true and I’m seeding 10:1.
December 23, 2025 at 3:13 AM
Day made: behold the many fashions of cook county treasurer Maria Pappas, who will see me through each month of 2026 with a fresh look
December 22, 2025 at 8:40 PM
Update on the day: as a pre-dentist treat I prepared to dig into a slice of red velvet cake from a local bakery.

They forgot to put sugar in the frosting, my favorite part. I did not enjoy a mouthful of whipped butter.

Off to the dentist; maybe they’ll amputate something in error.
tky.io Tim Yocum @tky.io · Dec 22
When I'm not busy breaking syrup bottles and then stepping on glass (both feet! never half-ass an avoidable injury!) my kid's secretly drinking her beloved Bachan's miso sauce straight from the bottle.

Anyway, I'm here to catch up on all the normal, happy things going on elsewhere today... 🌈
December 22, 2025 at 8:22 PM
When I'm not busy breaking syrup bottles and then stepping on glass (both feet! never half-ass an avoidable injury!) my kid's secretly drinking her beloved Bachan's miso sauce straight from the bottle.

Anyway, I'm here to catch up on all the normal, happy things going on elsewhere today... 🌈
December 22, 2025 at 6:35 PM