Totally Offside
@totallyoffside.bsky.social
author of this bio
Tripling the amount of children I have has really had a wild impact on the amount of shit posting I have time for and, I must say, I could not have picked a better time for this given the state of both the Leafs and the earth.
January 22, 2026 at 2:48 PM
Tripling the amount of children I have has really had a wild impact on the amount of shit posting I have time for and, I must say, I could not have picked a better time for this given the state of both the Leafs and the earth.
Not exactly breaking news. It has been broken for like 3 years.
X has stopped working
X has stopped working
www.independent.co.uk
January 16, 2026 at 3:37 PM
Not exactly breaking news. It has been broken for like 3 years.
Re: that Marner article, I don't hold any ill will toward the guy but also, I don't need to hear about how hard done by he is anymore if that makes sense.
January 16, 2026 at 2:00 AM
Re: that Marner article, I don't hold any ill will toward the guy but also, I don't need to hear about how hard done by he is anymore if that makes sense.
Marner only has 10 goals? How?
January 15, 2026 at 1:45 AM
Marner only has 10 goals? How?
Kuper and bourne do an absolute elite mini segment on Ivan Ivan.
January 14, 2026 at 12:46 AM
Kuper and bourne do an absolute elite mini segment on Ivan Ivan.
Me: "Nice. I actually managed to get both babies to nap at the same time! I think I'll put my feet up and relax for 5 minutes."
My oldest son:
My oldest son:
January 10, 2026 at 8:07 PM
Me: "Nice. I actually managed to get both babies to nap at the same time! I think I'll put my feet up and relax for 5 minutes."
My oldest son:
My oldest son:
Do you think you could survive a 100 foot fall into a pool filled with loosely packed, grocery store quality croissants?
January 10, 2026 at 7:34 PM
Do you think you could survive a 100 foot fall into a pool filled with loosely packed, grocery store quality croissants?
Even if the Leafs claw their way back in the mix here, I feel like you gotta just hold. They are so light on assets and I have no idea what they even are at this point. Feels like a year where you win with the guys that brought you or not at all.
January 10, 2026 at 3:01 PM
Even if the Leafs claw their way back in the mix here, I feel like you gotta just hold. They are so light on assets and I have no idea what they even are at this point. Feels like a year where you win with the guys that brought you or not at all.
I am on record thinking Sheldon Keefe is an average coach at best but I don't think he's killing NJD TBH. I think that team is just very overrated.
January 10, 2026 at 12:42 AM
I am on record thinking Sheldon Keefe is an average coach at best but I don't think he's killing NJD TBH. I think that team is just very overrated.
I think people are underselling the degree to which Canada needs to walk a finer line than Europe when it comes to commentary on US policy but, even acknowledging that, Carney's pushback is preeeeetty soft.
January 6, 2026 at 4:11 PM
I think people are underselling the degree to which Canada needs to walk a finer line than Europe when it comes to commentary on US policy but, even acknowledging that, Carney's pushback is preeeeetty soft.
Kind of shocking how mediocre the Eastern Conference is this year. Worst Leafs season in a decade. Second last in the conference.... 2 points out of a playoff spot.
December 29, 2025 at 3:34 PM
Kind of shocking how mediocre the Eastern Conference is this year. Worst Leafs season in a decade. Second last in the conference.... 2 points out of a playoff spot.
I've not yet reached my ultimate dad form where I get to start dressing like Peter McCallister but I'm working on it. It's a lifelong aspiration that I can and will achieve.
December 26, 2025 at 3:06 PM
I've not yet reached my ultimate dad form where I get to start dressing like Peter McCallister but I'm working on it. It's a lifelong aspiration that I can and will achieve.
My son got a full set of hockey gear and also a hundred pokemon cards for Christmas. Don't let anybody tell you I'm not letting him choose his own interests!
December 25, 2025 at 8:45 PM
My son got a full set of hockey gear and also a hundred pokemon cards for Christmas. Don't let anybody tell you I'm not letting him choose his own interests!
I don't know who invented town hall meetings at large companies but there's an argument you could make that they should be in jail.
December 18, 2025 at 5:00 PM
I don't know who invented town hall meetings at large companies but there's an argument you could make that they should be in jail.
Jarry is fine tbh. That's a reasonable bet by Edmonton, albeit kind of pricey.
December 12, 2025 at 3:49 PM
Jarry is fine tbh. That's a reasonable bet by Edmonton, albeit kind of pricey.
Nothing friendly had ever followed the phrase "Just a friendly reminder..."
December 12, 2025 at 3:31 PM
Nothing friendly had ever followed the phrase "Just a friendly reminder..."
Kinda surprised people are complaining about McMann getting a hearing. You actually aren't allowed to try to slap somebody in the chops with your stick, if you can believe it!
December 9, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Kinda surprised people are complaining about McMann getting a hearing. You actually aren't allowed to try to slap somebody in the chops with your stick, if you can believe it!
Football would be better without field goals tbh
December 7, 2025 at 7:48 PM
Football would be better without field goals tbh
Feeling pretty tired today. Didn't get much sleep. In related news, I had twins in October.
December 3, 2025 at 6:14 PM
Feeling pretty tired today. Didn't get much sleep. In related news, I had twins in October.
My son asked me to draw a charizard so he could trace it and, I mean... we can acknowledge I nailed, it, right?
November 29, 2025 at 3:14 PM
My son asked me to draw a charizard so he could trace it and, I mean... we can acknowledge I nailed, it, right?
Is Berube legit gonna get canned?
November 29, 2025 at 12:35 AM
Is Berube legit gonna get canned?
Heading to the Marlies game tonight. Haven't been paying anywhere close to my usual amount of attention to the Leafs this year. Not even sure who plays for the Marlies at this point tbh.
November 26, 2025 at 4:02 PM
Heading to the Marlies game tonight. Haven't been paying anywhere close to my usual amount of attention to the Leafs this year. Not even sure who plays for the Marlies at this point tbh.
My son has started calling chicken cold cuts "chicken bologna". And like, yeah, that's better.
November 25, 2025 at 5:01 PM
My son has started calling chicken cold cuts "chicken bologna". And like, yeah, that's better.
The great thing about having children is that you realize you have so much other stuff to occupy your time if the Leafs are poo. I'm young enough to feel confident I can wait the bums out but old enough to have other shit to do!
November 23, 2025 at 10:59 PM
The great thing about having children is that you realize you have so much other stuff to occupy your time if the Leafs are poo. I'm young enough to feel confident I can wait the bums out but old enough to have other shit to do!