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Town Guard

@townguard.bsky.social

590 followers 81 following 930 posts

I guard the town. Yes, yes, I know. You're the chosen hero of the ancient prophecy, but thou art going to be searched like any other wayfarer.

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Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 23h

We've not a cleric on our muster

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 1d

Off mine shift a little early due to owlbear bites. Quartermaster recommend I take a "long rest" to mend the wounds, as we're low on potions of health.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 1d

Owlbears :(

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 1d

Got chewed out. :(

By an owlbear, not the king.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 1d

Be it the elves who added letters unto arithmetic?

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 2d

Aye. We've heard tell of them. A novel thing, it is. But no alchemist in town had want to make the powder they so require.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

I remember the first words the Missus said to me:

"Greetings, fair guard."

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

On the watch, we always train new musters with the crossbow first. If they stay on more than a year, we begin training with a proper bow.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

All the time. Too many of the youth art quick to sell their soul to a patron for a few measly blasts of arcane energy.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

I find myself not unlike a gambler. The key be not checking every bag, but learning to read the way a traveler carries their eyes.

Slight annoyance or apprehension be a green flag. Too relax or too unwilling to make eye-contact art red flags.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

Ah! Nay. I've not had of it. Though I must try it on my next travel.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

The sign of the shop itself. Some adventurers devised an elaborate plan to lure a merchant from another town to their trap.

They didn't even need to steal the sign, they could hath just asked!

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

Waffles, then pancake. I am unfamiliar with 'french' toast, be it some regional dish?

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 3d

Nightshift tonight, ask of me anything

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 4d

Probably why disease runs rampant with some groups of adventurers.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 4d

Be not discouraged, goode jester. The battle thou fights is valiant. It be a campaign won not in a single stroke, but in consistent defiance.

Such missteps will happen. The only matter be that thou continues the walk after the stumble.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 4d

A roof and a door?? What luxury!

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 4d

Zonds! Two windows? I may not be able to afford such a luxury.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 5d

I was under the impression that's how new jesters came to be.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 5d

Apologies for mine grumpiness , Selûne was in retrograde.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 5d

I know looting be a thing that adventurers love, but I've met many who strip the very clothes off the dead to wear themselves.

That feels icky.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 5d

If I lost me head, the missus would never let me hear the end of it

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 5d

It seems like adventurers don't like to wear helmets.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 6d

I've always fancied the bill: goode, solid, and versatile. Though, the same praises can be said of the halberd, I be just more used to the common bill than it.

Though I admire the lucerne hammer a bit as well. Bit more of an armor-cracker, it is.

Town Guard @townguard.bsky.social · 6d

I think the primary attribute of a good polearm be how comfortable it is to lean against.