Alex Pilkington
@alxpilk.bsky.social
Writer // Blogger | Historian Highwaymen TNT |📍Arlington/DC | Socials at GayPHX | | I touch grass. | 999
Threads - trashy, tasteful, and timely below. The good stuff is posted to Substack (@alxpilk), the rest ends up at alxpilk.me.
Be Kind. Be Human.
Threads - trashy, tasteful, and timely below. The good stuff is posted to Substack (@alxpilk), the rest ends up at alxpilk.me.
Be Kind. Be Human.
Oliver Kornetzke blocked me on substack for criticizing his myopic take on masculinity a few months ago - he's a clown.
November 30, 2025 at 12:15 AM
Oliver Kornetzke blocked me on substack for criticizing his myopic take on masculinity a few months ago - he's a clown.
11/ Transmutation
The energy of limerence is powerful. It’s trapped vitality. Don’t repress it, transmute it.
Take that intense capacity for feeling and pour it into art, into community, into your own life so you don’t need to outsource your aliveness. /End
alxpilk.me/the-agony-an...
The energy of limerence is powerful. It’s trapped vitality. Don’t repress it, transmute it.
Take that intense capacity for feeling and pour it into art, into community, into your own life so you don’t need to outsource your aliveness. /End
alxpilk.me/the-agony-an...
The Agony and Ecstasy of Limerence | AlxPilk
I’ve been grappling lately with a specific form of human suffering that goes largely unnamed in our culture. It isn’t quite love, not quite addiction, and not quite obsession—though it shares the DNA ...
alxpilk.me
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
11/ Transmutation
The energy of limerence is powerful. It’s trapped vitality. Don’t repress it, transmute it.
Take that intense capacity for feeling and pour it into art, into community, into your own life so you don’t need to outsource your aliveness. /End
alxpilk.me/the-agony-an...
The energy of limerence is powerful. It’s trapped vitality. Don’t repress it, transmute it.
Take that intense capacity for feeling and pour it into art, into community, into your own life so you don’t need to outsource your aliveness. /End
alxpilk.me/the-agony-an...
10/ The Cure: Radical Honesty.
We must distinguish between observation (what a camera sees) and interpretation (the story we tell).
Stop relating to the movie in your head. Start relating to the messy, imperfect human in the room. Ground yourself in the body, not the mind.
We must distinguish between observation (what a camera sees) and interpretation (the story we tell).
Stop relating to the movie in your head. Start relating to the messy, imperfect human in the room. Ground yourself in the body, not the mind.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
10/ The Cure: Radical Honesty.
We must distinguish between observation (what a camera sees) and interpretation (the story we tell).
Stop relating to the movie in your head. Start relating to the messy, imperfect human in the room. Ground yourself in the body, not the mind.
We must distinguish between observation (what a camera sees) and interpretation (the story we tell).
Stop relating to the movie in your head. Start relating to the messy, imperfect human in the room. Ground yourself in the body, not the mind.
9/ The Ethical Cost.
There is a hidden narcissism in limerence. We are using the other person as a prop to regulate our own emotions or validate our worth.
To love a fantasy is, in a profound way, to fail to see or respect the humanity of the real person standing before you.
There is a hidden narcissism in limerence. We are using the other person as a prop to regulate our own emotions or validate our worth.
To love a fantasy is, in a profound way, to fail to see or respect the humanity of the real person standing before you.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
9/ The Ethical Cost.
There is a hidden narcissism in limerence. We are using the other person as a prop to regulate our own emotions or validate our worth.
To love a fantasy is, in a profound way, to fail to see or respect the humanity of the real person standing before you.
There is a hidden narcissism in limerence. We are using the other person as a prop to regulate our own emotions or validate our worth.
To love a fantasy is, in a profound way, to fail to see or respect the humanity of the real person standing before you.
8/ The Paradox of Proximity.
Real relationships are analog, messy, and finite. Limerence requires distance to survive.
This is why the "glimmer" often fades when you actually date the person. Proximity kills the fantasy because reality is the antibiotic to projection.
Real relationships are analog, messy, and finite. Limerence requires distance to survive.
This is why the "glimmer" often fades when you actually date the person. Proximity kills the fantasy because reality is the antibiotic to projection.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
8/ The Paradox of Proximity.
Real relationships are analog, messy, and finite. Limerence requires distance to survive.
This is why the "glimmer" often fades when you actually date the person. Proximity kills the fantasy because reality is the antibiotic to projection.
Real relationships are analog, messy, and finite. Limerence requires distance to survive.
This is why the "glimmer" often fades when you actually date the person. Proximity kills the fantasy because reality is the antibiotic to projection.
7/ The Digital Accelerant.
Limerence loves a vacuum. Texting and social media provide just enough data to spark interest, and just enough silence for us to project our fantasies into the gaps.
We fall in love with a simulacrum on a screen, not a soul.
Limerence loves a vacuum. Texting and social media provide just enough data to spark interest, and just enough silence for us to project our fantasies into the gaps.
We fall in love with a simulacrum on a screen, not a soul.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
7/ The Digital Accelerant.
Limerence loves a vacuum. Texting and social media provide just enough data to spark interest, and just enough silence for us to project our fantasies into the gaps.
We fall in love with a simulacrum on a screen, not a soul.
Limerence loves a vacuum. Texting and social media provide just enough data to spark interest, and just enough silence for us to project our fantasies into the gaps.
We fall in love with a simulacrum on a screen, not a soul.
6/ The Defense Against Nihilism.
Why do we choose this suffering? Because modern life can be unbearably flat. Limerence offers a high-stakes narrative. It provides a mission.
We often choose the torture of obsession over the numbness of boredom. It is the "Will to Limerence."
Why do we choose this suffering? Because modern life can be unbearably flat. Limerence offers a high-stakes narrative. It provides a mission.
We often choose the torture of obsession over the numbness of boredom. It is the "Will to Limerence."
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
6/ The Defense Against Nihilism.
Why do we choose this suffering? Because modern life can be unbearably flat. Limerence offers a high-stakes narrative. It provides a mission.
We often choose the torture of obsession over the numbness of boredom. It is the "Will to Limerence."
Why do we choose this suffering? Because modern life can be unbearably flat. Limerence offers a high-stakes narrative. It provides a mission.
We often choose the torture of obsession over the numbness of boredom. It is the "Will to Limerence."
5/ The "Limmer Beast."
This isn't just "having a crush." It shares DNA with OCD and addiction. Intrusive thoughts invade consciousness unbidden. It’s a siege.
Physiologically, it’s not love; it’s anxiety. It’s a fight-or-flight response masquerading as passion.
This isn't just "having a crush." It shares DNA with OCD and addiction. Intrusive thoughts invade consciousness unbidden. It’s a siege.
Physiologically, it’s not love; it’s anxiety. It’s a fight-or-flight response masquerading as passion.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
5/ The "Limmer Beast."
This isn't just "having a crush." It shares DNA with OCD and addiction. Intrusive thoughts invade consciousness unbidden. It’s a siege.
Physiologically, it’s not love; it’s anxiety. It’s a fight-or-flight response masquerading as passion.
This isn't just "having a crush." It shares DNA with OCD and addiction. Intrusive thoughts invade consciousness unbidden. It’s a siege.
Physiologically, it’s not love; it’s anxiety. It’s a fight-or-flight response masquerading as passion.
4/ The Origin: The Swooper
For the anxious attached, safety was often inconsistent. The brain learned that relief comes from a distant, perfect stranger who swoops in to save the day.
As adults, we hunt for this figure: someone distant enough to remain perfect, but close enough to promise rescue.
For the anxious attached, safety was often inconsistent. The brain learned that relief comes from a distant, perfect stranger who swoops in to save the day.
As adults, we hunt for this figure: someone distant enough to remain perfect, but close enough to promise rescue.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
4/ The Origin: The Swooper
For the anxious attached, safety was often inconsistent. The brain learned that relief comes from a distant, perfect stranger who swoops in to save the day.
As adults, we hunt for this figure: someone distant enough to remain perfect, but close enough to promise rescue.
For the anxious attached, safety was often inconsistent. The brain learned that relief comes from a distant, perfect stranger who swoops in to save the day.
As adults, we hunt for this figure: someone distant enough to remain perfect, but close enough to promise rescue.
3/ The Engine is Uncertainty.
Limerence thrives on "Intermittent Reinforcement." Like a gambler at a slot machine, we aren't addicted to the win; we are addicted to the maybe.
If they loved us back fully, the fantasy would collapse into mundane reality. We crave the dopamine of doubt.
Limerence thrives on "Intermittent Reinforcement." Like a gambler at a slot machine, we aren't addicted to the win; we are addicted to the maybe.
If they loved us back fully, the fantasy would collapse into mundane reality. We crave the dopamine of doubt.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
3/ The Engine is Uncertainty.
Limerence thrives on "Intermittent Reinforcement." Like a gambler at a slot machine, we aren't addicted to the win; we are addicted to the maybe.
If they loved us back fully, the fantasy would collapse into mundane reality. We crave the dopamine of doubt.
Limerence thrives on "Intermittent Reinforcement." Like a gambler at a slot machine, we aren't addicted to the win; we are addicted to the maybe.
If they loved us back fully, the fantasy would collapse into mundane reality. We crave the dopamine of doubt.
2/ Stendhal called this process "Crystallization."
We take an ordinary person—flawed, mundane, complex—and coat them in the crystals of our own projection.
We edit out the red flags and magnify the crumbs of attention. They stop being a person and become an Archetype: The Savior, The Muse.
We take an ordinary person—flawed, mundane, complex—and coat them in the crystals of our own projection.
We edit out the red flags and magnify the crumbs of attention. They stop being a person and become an Archetype: The Savior, The Muse.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
2/ Stendhal called this process "Crystallization."
We take an ordinary person—flawed, mundane, complex—and coat them in the crystals of our own projection.
We edit out the red flags and magnify the crumbs of attention. They stop being a person and become an Archetype: The Savior, The Muse.
We take an ordinary person—flawed, mundane, complex—and coat them in the crystals of our own projection.
We edit out the red flags and magnify the crumbs of attention. They stop being a person and become an Archetype: The Savior, The Muse.
1/ Limerence is a category error.
Love is a relationship between two human beings rooted in reality. Limerence is a relationship between a person and their own imagination.
It is the fundamental prioritization of a fantasy projection over the analog reality of the person in front of you.
Love is a relationship between two human beings rooted in reality. Limerence is a relationship between a person and their own imagination.
It is the fundamental prioritization of a fantasy projection over the analog reality of the person in front of you.
November 29, 2025 at 2:53 PM
1/ Limerence is a category error.
Love is a relationship between two human beings rooted in reality. Limerence is a relationship between a person and their own imagination.
It is the fundamental prioritization of a fantasy projection over the analog reality of the person in front of you.
Love is a relationship between two human beings rooted in reality. Limerence is a relationship between a person and their own imagination.
It is the fundamental prioritization of a fantasy projection over the analog reality of the person in front of you.
Reposted by Alex Pilkington
They really all are the same song.
November 21, 2025 at 8:00 PM
They really all are the same song.
12/ Three maps for the same hell:
Juice fought it.
Peep exposed it.
X became it.
They are gone, lost to the very darkness they tried to navigate. But they left behind a map. In a world that feels like a deadly crash, they didn't just give us songs; they gave us the language to survive the impact.
Juice fought it.
Peep exposed it.
X became it.
They are gone, lost to the very darkness they tried to navigate. But they left behind a map. In a world that feels like a deadly crash, they didn't just give us songs; they gave us the language to survive the impact.
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
12/ Three maps for the same hell:
Juice fought it.
Peep exposed it.
X became it.
They are gone, lost to the very darkness they tried to navigate. But they left behind a map. In a world that feels like a deadly crash, they didn't just give us songs; they gave us the language to survive the impact.
Juice fought it.
Peep exposed it.
X became it.
They are gone, lost to the very darkness they tried to navigate. But they left behind a map. In a world that feels like a deadly crash, they didn't just give us songs; they gave us the language to survive the impact.
11/ The literary twist is devastating.
The devil refuses the deal because X already has "fangs." The tragedy isn't that he sold his soul; it's that his pain had already transformed him into the very darkness he was trying to escape. "Anima vestra" was already taken.
alxpilk.me/the-boy-with...
The devil refuses the deal because X already has "fangs." The tragedy isn't that he sold his soul; it's that his pain had already transformed him into the very darkness he was trying to escape. "Anima vestra" was already taken.
alxpilk.me/the-boy-with...
The Boy with the Fangs: XXXTentacion’s Faustian Confession | AlxPilk
An analysis of
alxpilk.me
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
11/ The literary twist is devastating.
The devil refuses the deal because X already has "fangs." The tragedy isn't that he sold his soul; it's that his pain had already transformed him into the very darkness he was trying to escape. "Anima vestra" was already taken.
alxpilk.me/the-boy-with...
The devil refuses the deal because X already has "fangs." The tragedy isn't that he sold his soul; it's that his pain had already transformed him into the very darkness he was trying to escape. "Anima vestra" was already taken.
alxpilk.me/the-boy-with...
10/ The transaction is heartbreaking.
X enters the garden to trade his soul, not for power, but for silence. He describes a purgatory where "ten for the wolf and three for the shepherd" is the only math that matters.
X enters the garden to trade his soul, not for power, but for silence. He describes a purgatory where "ten for the wolf and three for the shepherd" is the only math that matters.
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
10/ The transaction is heartbreaking.
X enters the garden to trade his soul, not for power, but for silence. He describes a purgatory where "ten for the wolf and three for the shepherd" is the only math that matters.
X enters the garden to trade his soul, not for power, but for silence. He describes a purgatory where "ten for the wolf and three for the shepherd" is the only math that matters.
9/ XXXTentacion was The Vessel.
If Juice fought the abyss and Peep watched it, X let it consume him. His spirituality was chaotic and abrasive. "I Spoke to the Devil in Miami" is a modern Faustian bargain—not for fame, but for relief.
If Juice fought the abyss and Peep watched it, X let it consume him. His spirituality was chaotic and abrasive. "I Spoke to the Devil in Miami" is a modern Faustian bargain—not for fame, but for relief.
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
9/ XXXTentacion was The Vessel.
If Juice fought the abyss and Peep watched it, X let it consume him. His spirituality was chaotic and abrasive. "I Spoke to the Devil in Miami" is a modern Faustian bargain—not for fame, but for relief.
If Juice fought the abyss and Peep watched it, X let it consume him. His spirituality was chaotic and abrasive. "I Spoke to the Devil in Miami" is a modern Faustian bargain—not for fame, but for relief.
8/ The irony collapses into accusation.
"Welcome to America, that type of shit is typical." Peep realized that the "beauty" was a lie told to keep the oppressed in line. He didn't offer a solution; he just held up a mirror to the ugly truth.
alxpilk.me/life-is-beau...
"Welcome to America, that type of shit is typical." Peep realized that the "beauty" was a lie told to keep the oppressed in line. He didn't offer a solution; he just held up a mirror to the ugly truth.
alxpilk.me/life-is-beau...
'Life is Beautiful': A Song Analysis | AlxPilk
Lil Peep’s “Life is Beautiful” is irony at its most brutal—a posthumous track that systematically destroys its own title. From bleeding cuticles to terminal diagnoses to police violence, Peep forces l...
alxpilk.me
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
8/ The irony collapses into accusation.
"Welcome to America, that type of shit is typical." Peep realized that the "beauty" was a lie told to keep the oppressed in line. He didn't offer a solution; he just held up a mirror to the ugly truth.
alxpilk.me/life-is-beau...
"Welcome to America, that type of shit is typical." Peep realized that the "beauty" was a lie told to keep the oppressed in line. He didn't offer a solution; he just held up a mirror to the ugly truth.
alxpilk.me/life-is-beau...
7/ Peep’s genius was highlighting the mundane horror.
He lists the quiet tragedies we ignore: bleeding cuticles at work, awkward funerals, terminal diagnoses. He forces us to look at the "cubicle" and the "hospital" while sarcastically asking, "Isn't life beautiful?"
He lists the quiet tragedies we ignore: bleeding cuticles at work, awkward funerals, terminal diagnoses. He forces us to look at the "cubicle" and the "hospital" while sarcastically asking, "Isn't life beautiful?"
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
7/ Peep’s genius was highlighting the mundane horror.
He lists the quiet tragedies we ignore: bleeding cuticles at work, awkward funerals, terminal diagnoses. He forces us to look at the "cubicle" and the "hospital" while sarcastically asking, "Isn't life beautiful?"
He lists the quiet tragedies we ignore: bleeding cuticles at work, awkward funerals, terminal diagnoses. He forces us to look at the "cubicle" and the "hospital" while sarcastically asking, "Isn't life beautiful?"
6/ Lil Peep was The Observer.
He didn't fight the void; he styled it. He wore his vulnerability like a uniform. His track "Life is Beautiful" is a masterpiece of tragic irony, a hollow mantra repeated until it disintegrates.
He didn't fight the void; he styled it. He wore his vulnerability like a uniform. His track "Life is Beautiful" is a masterpiece of tragic irony, a hollow mantra repeated until it disintegrates.
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
6/ Lil Peep was The Observer.
He didn't fight the void; he styled it. He wore his vulnerability like a uniform. His track "Life is Beautiful" is a masterpiece of tragic irony, a hollow mantra repeated until it disintegrates.
He didn't fight the void; he styled it. He wore his vulnerability like a uniform. His track "Life is Beautiful" is a masterpiece of tragic irony, a hollow mantra repeated until it disintegrates.
5/ But the fight has a cost.
"Pop a perc, let it control me." In Juice’s theology, you sometimes have to kill the self to survive the war. He becomes "antisocial," trapped in a tactical nihilism just to keep the "phony" world at bay.
"Pop a perc, let it control me." In Juice’s theology, you sometimes have to kill the self to survive the war. He becomes "antisocial," trapped in a tactical nihilism just to keep the "phony" world at bay.
November 21, 2025 at 2:29 PM
5/ But the fight has a cost.
"Pop a perc, let it control me." In Juice’s theology, you sometimes have to kill the self to survive the war. He becomes "antisocial," trapped in a tactical nihilism just to keep the "phony" world at bay.
"Pop a perc, let it control me." In Juice’s theology, you sometimes have to kill the self to survive the war. He becomes "antisocial," trapped in a tactical nihilism just to keep the "phony" world at bay.