Ash MoF
@ashmof.bsky.social
Recovery, TTRPG’s, queer and coming of rage
Me, a well-adjusted mother with normal hobbies: search for videos of "Thanksgiving parade balloons"
YouTube, knowing my annual search history: Did you mean,
"Thanksgiving parade balloon disasters"?
YouTube, knowing my annual search history: Did you mean,
"Thanksgiving parade balloon disasters"?
November 11, 2025 at 6:49 PM
Me, a well-adjusted mother with normal hobbies: search for videos of "Thanksgiving parade balloons"
YouTube, knowing my annual search history: Did you mean,
"Thanksgiving parade balloon disasters"?
YouTube, knowing my annual search history: Did you mean,
"Thanksgiving parade balloon disasters"?
Traveling with family: “anyone who needs more than a backpack for a weekend is a princess and a sissy”
Traveling with bestie: “Hmm which suitcase can fit both the fluffy robes and the emotional support board games”
Traveling with bestie: “Hmm which suitcase can fit both the fluffy robes and the emotional support board games”
October 10, 2025 at 3:08 PM
Traveling with family: “anyone who needs more than a backpack for a weekend is a princess and a sissy”
Traveling with bestie: “Hmm which suitcase can fit both the fluffy robes and the emotional support board games”
Traveling with bestie: “Hmm which suitcase can fit both the fluffy robes and the emotional support board games”
“Can we go to a murder mystery? Also, does anyone actually die??”
- an alarming order for my kid to ask those questions in
- an alarming order for my kid to ask those questions in
October 9, 2025 at 8:46 PM
“Can we go to a murder mystery? Also, does anyone actually die??”
- an alarming order for my kid to ask those questions in
- an alarming order for my kid to ask those questions in
Fucked around (didn’t buy tasty snackies to eat) and found out 😢 (have no tasty snackies to eat)
October 8, 2025 at 3:36 PM
Fucked around (didn’t buy tasty snackies to eat) and found out 😢 (have no tasty snackies to eat)
What kind of sick fuck leaves an edible arrangement on a grave
The strawberries taste sour now
What an idiot
The strawberries taste sour now
What an idiot
October 6, 2025 at 7:43 PM
What kind of sick fuck leaves an edible arrangement on a grave
The strawberries taste sour now
What an idiot
The strawberries taste sour now
What an idiot
Male gaze this, female gaze that. Normalize wearing slutty goth tops because you’re excited to see your best friend
September 27, 2025 at 8:35 PM
Male gaze this, female gaze that. Normalize wearing slutty goth tops because you’re excited to see your best friend
“No, it’s movie magic. They didn’t actually give Ray Charles a gun.”
- The 200th question my kid had upon watching The Blues Brothers for the first time
- The 200th question my kid had upon watching The Blues Brothers for the first time
September 13, 2025 at 6:57 PM
“No, it’s movie magic. They didn’t actually give Ray Charles a gun.”
- The 200th question my kid had upon watching The Blues Brothers for the first time
- The 200th question my kid had upon watching The Blues Brothers for the first time
I can’t do the 6th step, those are my emotional support character defects
September 12, 2025 at 4:20 PM
I can’t do the 6th step, those are my emotional support character defects
Husband: (describes the terrible day he’s having)
Me: Well, at least your mentally ill wife is back on her bullshit.
Husband: (with adoration) … Was she ever off her bullshit?
Me: Well, at least your mentally ill wife is back on her bullshit.
Husband: (with adoration) … Was she ever off her bullshit?
September 4, 2025 at 9:53 PM
Husband: (describes the terrible day he’s having)
Me: Well, at least your mentally ill wife is back on her bullshit.
Husband: (with adoration) … Was she ever off her bullshit?
Me: Well, at least your mentally ill wife is back on her bullshit.
Husband: (with adoration) … Was she ever off her bullshit?
Kid: You say This too shall pass, but not everything does. Not death.
Me: Ok, well what is implied isn’t that death isn’t a permanent state, so much as the acute pain we experience in the immediacy of grief becomes something we can eventually adapt to and heal around
Kid:
Taco Bell cashier:
Me: Ok, well what is implied isn’t that death isn’t a permanent state, so much as the acute pain we experience in the immediacy of grief becomes something we can eventually adapt to and heal around
Kid:
Taco Bell cashier:
August 28, 2025 at 10:04 PM
Kid: You say This too shall pass, but not everything does. Not death.
Me: Ok, well what is implied isn’t that death isn’t a permanent state, so much as the acute pain we experience in the immediacy of grief becomes something we can eventually adapt to and heal around
Kid:
Taco Bell cashier:
Me: Ok, well what is implied isn’t that death isn’t a permanent state, so much as the acute pain we experience in the immediacy of grief becomes something we can eventually adapt to and heal around
Kid:
Taco Bell cashier:
Kid: “I miss when I was little. My mom would be like, ‘Good morning! What do you want to do today! We can do anything because I don’t have depression yet. 🥰’”
Me: “… I don’t remember ever saying that.”
Kid: “You did. It was awesome.”
Me: “… I don’t remember ever saying that.”
Kid: “You did. It was awesome.”
August 19, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Kid: “I miss when I was little. My mom would be like, ‘Good morning! What do you want to do today! We can do anything because I don’t have depression yet. 🥰’”
Me: “… I don’t remember ever saying that.”
Kid: “You did. It was awesome.”
Me: “… I don’t remember ever saying that.”
Kid: “You did. It was awesome.”
1) maintain eye contact
2) use teeth aggressively
3) eat that cucumber sideways
Follow me for more tips on keeping him 🌶️ horny and afraid 🔥
2) use teeth aggressively
3) eat that cucumber sideways
Follow me for more tips on keeping him 🌶️ horny and afraid 🔥
August 11, 2025 at 10:50 PM
1) maintain eye contact
2) use teeth aggressively
3) eat that cucumber sideways
Follow me for more tips on keeping him 🌶️ horny and afraid 🔥
2) use teeth aggressively
3) eat that cucumber sideways
Follow me for more tips on keeping him 🌶️ horny and afraid 🔥
Reposted by Ash MoF
fucked up my first three hauntings now they got me answering ouija boards
August 9, 2025 at 10:43 AM
fucked up my first three hauntings now they got me answering ouija boards
Me: I’m so glad menopause hasn’t changed my demeanor or made me grouchier
Also me: Where the FUCK are all the SPOONS
Also me: Where the FUCK are all the SPOONS
August 8, 2025 at 3:52 PM
Me: I’m so glad menopause hasn’t changed my demeanor or made me grouchier
Also me: Where the FUCK are all the SPOONS
Also me: Where the FUCK are all the SPOONS
My therapist: “About ‘winning therapy’. You were the first one to use that phrase with me, but I’ve heard it a lot since.”
Me: “Aw, I thought you were going to say I was the first one to win.”
Therapist: (sighs deeply)
Me: “Aw, I thought you were going to say I was the first one to win.”
Therapist: (sighs deeply)
August 1, 2025 at 1:13 AM
My therapist: “About ‘winning therapy’. You were the first one to use that phrase with me, but I’ve heard it a lot since.”
Me: “Aw, I thought you were going to say I was the first one to win.”
Therapist: (sighs deeply)
Me: “Aw, I thought you were going to say I was the first one to win.”
Therapist: (sighs deeply)
Girl I went to high school with: “OMG you haven’t changed a bit in 20 years! You’re even wearing a Modest Mouse shirt!”
Me, nervously: “Ha ha! Yeah! It is definitely not… the same… one”
Me, nervously: “Ha ha! Yeah! It is definitely not… the same… one”
July 25, 2025 at 2:16 PM
Girl I went to high school with: “OMG you haven’t changed a bit in 20 years! You’re even wearing a Modest Mouse shirt!”
Me, nervously: “Ha ha! Yeah! It is definitely not… the same… one”
Me, nervously: “Ha ha! Yeah! It is definitely not… the same… one”
Slipping a 6 foot stuffed Jesus into someone's bed like a severed horse head to let them know they fucked up but you're not mad just disappointed
July 24, 2025 at 4:14 PM
Slipping a 6 foot stuffed Jesus into someone's bed like a severed horse head to let them know they fucked up but you're not mad just disappointed
“your internet connection is unstable” girl you and me both
July 24, 2025 at 1:03 PM
“your internet connection is unstable” girl you and me both
Emptying a container of rainbow sprinkles onto the floor in front of the robot vacuum to establish dominance
July 7, 2025 at 6:35 PM
Emptying a container of rainbow sprinkles onto the floor in front of the robot vacuum to establish dominance
What if my perimenopause brain fog isn’t that bad and I genuinely am just stupid now
June 30, 2025 at 6:01 PM
What if my perimenopause brain fog isn’t that bad and I genuinely am just stupid now
Me: “Do you think it’s appropriate to wear my ‘Bi AF’ Converse to this?”
Husband: “I don’t think they say anything that (gestures vaguely) the rest of your general appearance isn’t already saying.”
Husband: “I don’t think they say anything that (gestures vaguely) the rest of your general appearance isn’t already saying.”
April 25, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Me: “Do you think it’s appropriate to wear my ‘Bi AF’ Converse to this?”
Husband: “I don’t think they say anything that (gestures vaguely) the rest of your general appearance isn’t already saying.”
Husband: “I don’t think they say anything that (gestures vaguely) the rest of your general appearance isn’t already saying.”
Me: “You know what Sim would be a great sugar daddy?”
Me & my best friend at the exact same time: “… Santa.”
Me & my best friend at the exact same time: “… Santa.”
April 12, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Me: “You know what Sim would be a great sugar daddy?”
Me & my best friend at the exact same time: “… Santa.”
Me & my best friend at the exact same time: “… Santa.”