Sepia-toned memory: there was an older guy in our neighborhood who said he’d been a boxer. His yard was “beef central” because he’d hand us gloves and tell us to settle our differences the right way. I’d love to say I’m going pop the trunk and hand them some gloves lol

“I’m not gambling, I’m just placing monetary bets on the outcomes of future events” FOH.

Lmao the way I read this and instantly heard “aye bruh lemme get wunna them up off yah big dog”

Seriously atp just get an official condom sponsor and prepare to ship a couple pallets for the summer games

Gac is an appropriate name as it’s the same noise I made when they opened it.

The allure of AI is they get to be modern day Thomas Jefferson’s with the conveniences of their personal Monticello’s powered by labor they don’t have to see or care about.

Wut in the HR Giger is the name of this fruit? It looks pre-chamoy’d

Airport layovers will never be the same 🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

I will admit that this regime is responsible for me duct taping my imposter syndrome’s mouth shut cuz if these are the people in charge, I can’t possibly be that bad at my job.

Give me paper towels, even if it’s the lowest grade paper allowed before I’ll use the community booty air blower