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BlueShiftNZ

@blueshiftnz.bsky.social

840 followers 1.3K following 8.1K posts

Kiwi Kirikiriroa, Hamiltron Dogs, dad-jokes, lefty Avery T. Deacon-Harry was a handle Jeremy is my actual name Hi!

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 7h

Precisely the image in my mind...

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 8h

Or listen to any standup by Billy Connolly - a 30 second setup & punchline takes a good 30 minutes to tell.

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 8h

Tourists will mispronounce somewhere like Te Kauwhata very differently from how the locals mispronounce Teekawatta.

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 8h

On the power bill, Foxy, its right there in the headline. You'd think she'd be keener on getting some solar panels on the Beehive or something...

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 8h

And some where you can tell exactly when they got famous enough to override their editor...

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 10h

Hi @flibbertyshop.bsky.social! Nice to see you out there having fun 🦄

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 11h

Paraparaumu
Te Kauwhata
Whanganui
Palmerston North
Waikikamukau

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 12h

Someone is having a very awkward meeting with their manager this morning. Probably with their manager's manager's manager involved... Generally speaking...

Reposted by BlueShiftNZ

f*male b*tch 🇵🇸 @ahhmandah.bsky.social · 23h

this is VERY old now but still slaps

youtu.be/7CvmzPNNlHA?...

AotearoHA: Rising Stars - The Fan Brigade

YouTube video by NZIntlComedyFestival

youtu.be

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Not weird, this stuff is fascinating!

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Fer sher. If I'm witchin' I'm witchin' in the woods in a cabin with chicken legs.

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Less FIGJAM and more FOWDLY (Fuck Off We Don't Like You)

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

"What I would say to you is, I didn't take this job seeking honours, blah, blah" Then when its announced "This is so unexpected, but it would be unseemly of me to decline the wishes of my peers, etc, etc,"

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Come on now, Matt, they've shoehorned it into Excel and its right nearly 58% of the time! I see no issues here.

a girl in a red shirt is writing on a white board with numbers

Alt: a girl in a red shirt is writing on a white board with numbers, she is adding 248 and 208 to make 4416.

media.tenor.com

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

"And required reading this term: Tequila Mockingbird, The Grapes of Wrath, The Mojito Coast, and A Cask of Amontillado."

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Wouldn't want to belong to any coven that would have someone like me as a member!

a black and white photo of two men standing next to each other holding a piece of paper .

Alt: Groucho Marx in conversation with Zeppo.

media.tenor.com

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Yeah, If you're not writing to get the voices in your head out, how even does that work?

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BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

Pretty sure they'd like Swarbrick to call off everyone talking about that too.

BlueShiftNZ @blueshiftnz.bsky.social · 1d

I'm also aphantasiac, but I can art. I know what the thing I'm making/drawing should look like, even though I don't have an actual "picture" of it in my head.
I can't imagine writing without my inner monologue though, but I imagine its a similar thing.