If you overfill the fuel upon returning a rental car/uhaul, you should be entitled to reimbursement at their same bullshit price per gallon. Please @secretarypete while there’s still time. Please act fast Pete. Please

I’m sick of this boil water advisory. Shit is so fuckin hot

ME: I got SULMAR, CHOMOS and ZANKQI? That doesn’t make any sense
[three ancient mystical warriors appear in my living room, preparing to kill me with axes]
ME: ugh here we go again

Pat just said this without a hint of irony.

How does one go about cheering for an Auburn?

“Go Freezus, Go Jesus,

Lapsed but still Baptist,

Bourbon, Rye, Saint Pat Dye

Spreading out across the nation

It’s an ongoing investigation”

God, I love college football so much