House of 1000 Fionas
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cogentanalysis.bsky.social
House of 1000 Fionas
@cogentanalysis.bsky.social
4.4K followers 230 following 220 posts
oh god, it's come to this
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cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Here's a good example that came up at work today

Yeah, all H-4 dependent children, make your Facebook profile public, the perverts need to vet you "lol"
Screenshot of title and 1st paragraph of https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/News/visas-news/announcement-of-expanded-screening-and-vetting-for-h-1b-and-dependent-h-4-visa-applicants.html Announcement of Expanded Screening and Vetting for H-1B and Dependent H-4 Visa Applicants Updated: December 3, 2025 As of December 15, the Department will expand the requirement that an online presence review be conducted for all H-1B applicants and their dependents, in addition to the students and exchange visitors already subject to this review. [I highlighted the following sentence for emphasis] To facilitate this vetting, all applicants for H-1B and their dependents (H-4), F, M, and J nonimmigrant visas are instructed to adjust the privacy settings on all of their social media profiles to “public.”
December 4, 2025 at 12:47 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
My main hobbies
Wikipedia article "See also" section with links to: - Screaming (in music) - Screaming (in general)
October 22, 2025 at 4:35 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Method: Fifty-four participants were randomly assigned to reactivation+Tetris (visuospatial), reactivation+Word games (verbal), or reactivation-only (no task). They watched an aversive film (day 0) and recorded intrusive memories of the film in diary A. On day 4, memory was reactivated, after which participants played Tetris, Word games, or had no task for 10 minutes. They then kept a second diary (B). Informative hypotheses were evaluated using Bayes factors. Results: Reactivation+Tetris and reactivation+Word games resulted in relatively fewer intrusions from the last day of diary A to the first day of diary B than reactivation-only (objective 1 and 2). Thus, both tasks were effective even when applied days after analogue trauma. Reactivation-only was not effective.
September 11, 2025 at 6:43 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
It's funny because it's true
Weird Al at the end of the "Living with a Hernia" video, dressed like James Brown, yelling "I feel BAD!" right before he falls over
June 12, 2025 at 1:00 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Finally unlocked the "Japanese for Bitches" unit in Duolingo
A screenshot of a Japanese listening exercise in Duolingo, and the English translation of the sentence is "Isn't your makeup a bit overdone?"
June 9, 2025 at 3:03 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
I uploaded a gif, goddamnit, if I knew it wouldn't work I woulda picked this single frame where all of his fingers are all bloody
Homer Simpson playing the knife game at his kitchen table, and each of his fingers have a bloody red spot where he's stabbed each of them, and the knife is in his index finger (he is saying "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.")
March 17, 2025 at 2:30 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
This is what getting up and going to work every day feels like
Homer Simpson sitting at the kitchen table playing the knife game with a stiletto blade but the knife never touches the table and he just keeps stabbing his fingers (he is saying "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow")
March 17, 2025 at 2:21 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Here are my thoughts on the Super Bowl
Text messages I sent to my boyfriend, reading "They should do the moral thing and change their logo to a fire helmet, and be the Chiefs in the sense of firefighters" and "Much like I feel The Reds and The Browns should change everything to potatoes"
February 10, 2025 at 2:41 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Getting ready to wear this shirt every day for the next several years
A black tee shirt laid flat to show off the white line illustration of a guillotine on a raised wooden platform, with the caption "A PLATFORM FOR FASCISTS" (from ScienTees on etsy)
January 22, 2025 at 4:39 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
The only way I can imagine getting through the next year is to go to as many events as possible where I can wear this Lorna Shore shirt that's the Pieta except Jesus has been decapitated (this was Last Podcast live)
A public venue bathroom mirror selfie of me where I'm wearing glasses, a mask, a black jacket over a black hoodie, and the Lorna Shore Pieta shirt where Mary is cradling Jesus's decapitated body, and there is blood all over his chest and shoulders and Mary's clothes, and his severed head is resting on the ground next to his own hip, but the face has a somewhat blank but serene expression. The kinda vibe I'm tryna cultivate for 2025. Don't tell my Grandpa about this shirt.
December 30, 2024 at 5:54 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
(Tim-Robinson-wearing-a-hot-dog-costume voice)

Yeah right, you piece of dog shit, YOU'RE FUCKING DOG SHIT!!!!!!
screenshot from my Suggested Accounts tab on bluesky, where The Democrats is the top suggested account. Their profile summary is "We're fighting for a better, fairer, and brighter future for every American." You sure bout that? You sure bout that that's why??
December 4, 2024 at 10:41 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Great news, Bluesky just rolled out this feature!!
Screenshot of @cogentanalyis tweet posted 14-Nov-2022 reading "But if Twitter stops existing, how will men be able to explain my own jokes back to me??"
November 19, 2024 at 5:14 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Here's a video where you can more clearly see the be-banana-costumed fellow kickin' ase
October 28, 2024 at 4:03 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Cognitively cacophonous experience to watch them setting up for Lorna Shore while the lite fm filler music plays "Heaven is a Place on Earth"
October 28, 2024 at 1:16 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
You know it's gonna be a good night when right off the bat there's a banana in the circle pit
October 28, 2024 at 12:24 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
All me, baybee!!
Screenshot of this, one of my greatest joke achievements, as originally tweeted in November 2014
October 17, 2024 at 3:13 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
"He's beginning to think outside the bun."
Trinity asks Morpheus "What is he doing?" Morpheus with a look of growing triumphant wonder
March 1, 2024 at 6:08 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Can't wait to enjoy some delicious (squints) hoogs
A hot dog cart on a corner in NYC. The double panel sliding window is partly open so that the "Nathan's HOT DOGS" decal across both panes overlaps to read "HOOGS" (also a very truncated cartoon hotdog)
December 29, 2023 at 4:33 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Oh, Henry Kissinger is dead?
Immediately after The Ramones finish playing the birthday song, CJ Ramone telling Mr. Burns "Go to hell, you old bastard"
November 30, 2023 at 2:14 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
This is some fuckin bullshit
Spelling Bee puzzle saying that "lepton" isn't in the word list
October 18, 2023 at 3:04 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
You drive like a dick, Big Tina
Back of a black Mercedes with a New York state "War on Terror Veteran" vanity plate that reads BIGTNA
September 29, 2023 at 2:51 AM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
JEsus FuCking CHRIIIIIIIST
Bumble profile "About me" section that just says "I have a lot of respect for women because I know the important role they play in our lives either as a wife or mother"
September 17, 2023 at 9:06 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Judge Reinhold looking shocked
September 4, 2023 at 8:14 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
Oh my god, all the Bumble dudes saying they're "calm cool and collective" have nothing on this bio I just saw holy shit
Bumble profile "About me" section that just says "A very non-judge mental person"
September 4, 2023 at 8:06 PM
cogentanalysis.bsky.social
lol lol lol is that like blue balls
Google search overview of "Giardia" which has the subheader "Also called: beaver fever"
September 4, 2023 at 2:56 AM