The MCU (eugh) makes him out to be a fanboy of the avengers. Fuck that noise. Pete does little-people level work 'cause it matters. The avengers don't and peter would be pissed off at that.

In the same breath they wax on and on about how 'uncle ben died in his arms, poor kid' and then say he's naive and takes a childish approach to everything.

Peter Parker getting into the world of crime fighting should send shivers down the spines of goons everywhere

This fanfiction is 2,000,000 words long and written like an IKEA instruction manual

It's also like, 90% banter porn. Disgusting, that's not what real human conversation looks like.

Nobody water cools their creatures anymore. Dinosaurs used to be so fucking cool they had to have radiators sticking out their backs. This is because of woke, presumably