I've reached a new low(high?).

Microwave break and bake cookies for 30 seconds. Eat them with a fork.

Thank me later.

Forever confused by the people who seem to think they're entitled to park in the fire lane at Walmart

Dear @pizzahut.bsky.social , can you make a breadstick
That's just your stuffed crust?

Please and thank you.

In today's day and age, you're a jerk if you continue to use your shitty broken debit card.

I shouldn't have to stand on my head to get your chip to work.

I'm just here to find the other gaylors. 😂

They announced Danny as 5th. My favorite person won. NOT Danny. #dwts

How do I get in contact with the PBA? I have an idea for a tournament. Cosmic bowling on weekend burn. After a birthday party.

Separate the heroes from the whiners.

The airport breakfast of champions

Sometimes I wonder why I eat anything but blocks of cheese. Then I remember the lactose intolerance. Happiness is pain🤷🏻‍♀️.

Man, I wonder how my top 8 would compare. RIP MySpace.

My first post probably should be something momentous.