Benito's reaction in video form

big day for herpetology on the skyline 💚 you love to see it

There's still good info and good memes. It's just better to get those things directly or close to directly from the source, and a mindless scroll is not conducive to that.

this might sound trite and may be belaboring the point but i believe what i've been describing isn't just two different approaches to a single art form but rather two distinct (and non-mutually-exclusive) art forms

that was a lot of words and i don't think i even have any specific advice. i just wanted to share my dance with perfectionism in my playing and how it is connected to my listening habits. and i guess to say that just because someone embraces imperfection doesn't mean they don't appreciate perfection

now it's just been a year or so & i'm in a totally changed place from where i'd been for most of my 25+ years trying my hands at music. i'm embracing the unexpected & seeking to see "mistakes" as the gifts they can be when allowed if i can detach from expectation to seek something new (and find it!)

second, i made the connection to concepts i learned from modular synthesis regarding the use of noise as a source of modulation. a unique source of noise is a lovely thing, and wouldn't you know it i've got one of those inside of me

something that crept into my awareness, during the last year or two before my breakthrough, is that i've had Dyspraxia my whole life w/o knowing. that sparked two light bulbs for me: first all that frustration trying and failing to attain classical standards of performance, melted into understanding

that all changed one day. there may or may not have been psychedelics involved. i suddenly found myself feeling totally free of self-conscious anxiety. so, i sat down at the piano, and i went at it. i just really *let it happen* for the first time in my life and it was the best thing i'd ever played

i kept at this here & there for a few years, and made progress. even released a few recordings which was Terrifying for me, particularly the part where the red light comes on and i have to play while knowing everything is on the record. but still felt incapable of fluency (oops language trauma)

my unguided practice consisted of letting my hands do some talking while listening with the intention of loving whatever sound i make. it was an intermittently frustrating and encouraging process for me

skip to my late 20s and i've given up on both composition and classical training after pursuing for most of 15 years. i find Becca Stevens and Bill Laurance and start to appreciate a wider range of harmony as well as the ever-phasing rhythms of Becca's vocal melodies. i start practicing improv

the thing is, barring a few exceptions i found myself having trouble enjoying his music. i found elements grating and didn't often go back for a second listen, but i kept myself tuned into his new releases, always listening at least once to hear what he was up to

his words both surprised and resonated with me, and i just wanted to absorb as much of that perspective as i could so as to find that appreciation for myself in a tangible way